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Articles on reading men’s body language, first impressions, reading your coworkers and goal setting

Articles on reading men’s body language, first impressions, reading your coworkers and goal setting are below. You can either link to the online article or scroll down to read the text here.
Decoding Men’s Body Language
Make a Great First Impression
What Do Your Coworkers Really Think About You
Decode His Body Language Signals (Has  Photos of Men’s Tells)
How to Reach Your Goals


Decoding His Body Language
Family & Relationships
by Chelsea-Lysette  |  on December 3rd, 2012  |  0 comment(s)


The male mind is a complicated thing to understand. Guys complain about females being a complex and difficult being to comprehend but men are just as much of a mystery as we are. Chances are you’ve come across a male in your life that basically through you for a loop. You couldn’t tell whether he liked you; or if he did it was hard to decipher if his feelings were non-committal or sincere; and your feelings about him were dependent on what he thought of you or how he felt. Now deciphering all this would be easy if women were mind readers and our only mission in life was to love and be loved. But let’s face it, neither one of those are real. We can only read what we see, which is why understanding a guy’s body language is critical to knowing whether he is interested in you and what his intentions are right from the very first introduction.
His aim: according to body language specialist Patti Wood, a man will aim his upper body at the most meaningful thing in the room to him. Even if his face is looking one way, his upper body will say it all and
The flash smile: this movement is lightning-quick so keep a close eye out. According to Tonya Reiman, author of The Power of Body Language, when a guy raises his eyebrow quickly and smiles it’s safe to assume he is genuinely attracted to you. During this movement, the guy will quickly lift his eyebrows and wrinkle his forehead. If you can catch a glimpse of it, you’ll know if he’s attracted to you.
Three Shades of Smiles: the first is the coy smile, which is one of the more sincere smiles that will tell a woman when a guy sees you more than just a bed buddy. If he puts on a mixed grin and smile then the guy is definitely interested in you but may not want to give too much away at first. He could be shy or just making an attempt at being subtle but this is definitely one of the better signs. But ladies, do not get this confused with the half-smile, which screams a ‘no-strings attached’ kind of attitude. The coy smile is more of a shy grin while the half smile is more of a sneer-like grin. Beware! The tight-lipped smile is commonly known as the ‘polite smile,’ which basically leaves you in the friend-zone—for the time being. It’s his way of saying “thanks, but no thanks.” It’s not a complete loss though, there is still time for him to eventually develop potential feelings.
The gaze: if a guy holds your gaze for more than five seconds, it most likely means he only has sex with you on his mind. Not that the gazer shouldn’t be taken seriously as being potential dating material, but there’s a possibility that he only sees you as the freak in the sheets and not a woman in the streets.
His stance: guys love to show off their greatest asset, and most of the time they think it’s their crotch. More often than not, a man will stand or sit with his legs apart. Either way, he’s making it a point to draw your attention to his groin. This movement is called the “crotch display.” Tracy Cox, author of Superflirt, says that this move shows ‘machismo’ and manhood. So look out for the thumbs on the belt loop or a ‘subtle’ touch of his family jewels; if he’s going to point them out, you might as well look!
Understanding a guy’s body language from the very first meeting is always difficult. There are so many factors to take in like setting, the kind of people you both are surrounded by, and the circumstances of the initial meeting. Stay tuned for more to learn what his body language means when your dating, when your sleeping together, and when the relationship is all said an done!



Meeting someone new? Don’t skip the formalities. Shaking hands before a social interaction makes a more positive impression than a no-handshake greeting, according to an article to be published in an upcoming issue of the Journal of Cognitive Neuroscience.
Researchers tracked the brain activity of people who watched and rated videos of non-verbal guest-host exchanges. During handshake exchanges, the results showed increased activity in the brain’s reward processing region, which the researchers say demonstrates a link between the positive impact of a handshake and social evaluation.
But a handshake is more than just part of a friendly introduction—it helps break the ice, too, says Patti Wood, body language expert and author of Snap, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma. Shaking hands began as peace offering—proof you didn’t have any weapons, Wood says. Nowadays it still has the same primal effect of breaking down the “stranger barrier,” she explains. Go without the handshake, however, and “it will take longer to feel comfortable and safe with someone,” she says.
Think your shake needs assistance? Wood says to start early when meeting someone new. “Put your hand out to prepare for a handshake at least four to six feet away from the person,” she says. That way your new acquaintance isn’t surprised by your gesture, and there’s no risk of crowding each other.
Want to avoid a weak grip or the embarrassing fingers-only fumble? “Pointing your fingers down and scooping into the palm of the other person’s hand will prevent them from grabbing too shallow or getting a wimpy handshake,” Wood says.


What Your Co-Workers Really Think
Posted on: June 26th, 2013 by Thamar Houliston






Find out what your colleagues think of you…
Your Colleagues Like You If…
They Initiate Conversations
Coffee clicks have gone the way of cigarette breaks – they’re all but extinct. Nowadays most people communicate by email, IM, or phone. “So if your colleagues are chatting you up in the hallway, they’re taking time to break routine to speak to you,” says body language expert Patti Wood. If they avert their eyes or sneak glances at their watches during a conversation, they may not be so into you.
They Offer Feedback
During a one-on-one, does your colleague nod thoughtfully and lean into your conversation? Do the corners of her eyes crinkle when she smiles in response to funny comments you make? “The more animated a person’s face, the more emotionally invested they are in the conversation,” says Tonya Reiman, author of The Power of Body Language.
They’re Smooth Talkers
“People deviate from their normal speech patterns when they’re nervous or uncomfortable,” says body language expert Maryann Karinch, co-author of How to Spot a Liar. Someone who normally speaks at a leisurely pace might become a speed talker, while a person who usually talks quickly might pause for long moments. If they enjoy your company, you won’t notice a change in their vocal stride.
Your Colleagues Respect You If…
They Keep Quiet
Asking for your opinion – that’s a no-brainer. But letting you take control of a conversation is a less obvious way to show how much they care about what you have to say. “You can see the degree to which other people respect you by observing how often they look to you for a reaction or a cue,” says psychologist Ann Demarais, co-author of First Impressions: What You Don’t Know About How Others See You. “And when a problem arises, they turn to face you.”
They Make Room For You
“When you sit down at a meeting, see if your neighbours move their stuff closer to themselves and out of your way, or push their chair back a bit to give you more room,” Demarais says. “That shows respect.”
They Copy You
What they say about imitation and flattery is true: “Subconsciously, we try to mirror people we like and respect,” Reiman says. So if you notice your colleague mimicking your movements – for example, picking up her pen or cupping her chin with her hand when you do – she probably admires you.
A Colleague Has A Crush On You If…
He Goes The Extra Mile
He spends an hour trying to fix your frozen computer, gives up his chair at a crowded conference room table, or offers to pick you up a latte during his afternoon coffee run. Maybe he’s just an incredibly nice guy – but more likely, he’s into you.
He Drops Your Name
Saying things like “Hi, Jane,” or “How are you doing, Jane?” may seem like common courtesy, but it’s actually an intimate gesture. Consider it the verbal equivalent of a touch on the arm – a way to get more personal.
He’s A Stand-Up Guy
In the civilised world as in the wild, strong, physically imposing alpha males have the best shot at mating. So men instinctively want to make themselves seem bigger and badder around women they’re interested in, Reiman says. If he suddenly stops slouching and puffs out his chest when he’s around you (the old “I’m just stretching my arms” routine), take note – he may have a crush.

http://www.womenshealthsa.co.za/sex-love/decode-him/read-his-signals/



Read His Signals
Posted on: May 1st, 2013 by Lori Cohen

















What’s he really thinking? Find out just by looking at him…

He’s Lying













The Clue: He keeps scratching his nose or ears.
When a man is afraid of being caught in a lie, his heart rate often accelerates and blood rushes to his nose, ears and forehead, creating an itchy, tingly sensation.
Your Move: To get the truth out of him, put on your friendliest face. Then frame your questions in a way that sounds like you’re being curious rather than accusatory. A fibber will rarely plot out the minutiae of his story, so if you listen long enough he may get tripped up in his convoluted tale and spill the beans.



He’s Second-Guessing Your Relationship












The Clue: He always seems to be holding something in his hands.
He may be avoiding intimacy, since keeping his paws occupied prevents him from touching you. “Creating physical distance until he’s ready to make a decision is often how men process their feelings,” says body-language expert Patti Wood.
Your Move: Call him on it. Say, “I love that we’re so open with each other, but I feel like you’re not telling me something.” If he blows you off, press him by saying, “I can handle whatever it is.” This might convince him you won’t freak out – a major fear men have about self-expression, says Dr Scott Haltzman, author of The Secrets of Happy Families. If he starts talking, great, but if he’s indecisive about the relationship, suggest finding some space until he knows where he stands.



He Has Something To Confess












The Clue: He draws his lips.
“When a man has to get something off his chest, his mouth will tense up and he’ll press his lips together as if he can’t decide whether he should open his mouth and upload the bad news,” says Wood.
Your Move: When an enquiry sounds sincere, it can calm a suspect – er, man – into making a confession. Try something like, “You look upset. Anything you want to tell me?” No matter what, remain deadpan, even if what he says upsets you. “The best way to get information from a guy is to keep a neutral expression while he speaks so he won’t change his story based on your reaction,” says Haltzman.



His Ego Is Wounded


T










The Clue: He holds one of his wrists.
“It may appear that he’s adjusting his watch, but it can be a sign that he’s feeling insecure,” says Wood. It’s like he’s protecting himself – his arm acts like a shield positioned across his body.
Your Move: Guys love to feel like superheroes, so when his boss lambastes him or you dis him (inadvertently), his confidence can plummet. “When a man’s feelings are hurt or he’s trying to sort out a particular issue, he feels powerless,” says Haltzman. “Give him some alone time to think the issue through and regain control.”



REACH YOUR GOALS
The Start-Smart Strategy for Success
Want to turn goal-setting into goal-getting? Here's how to reach your professional, financial, and personal potential–starting now!
Published: May 1, 2012  |  By Caitlin Carlson
The Start-Smart Strategy for Success Want to turn goal-setting into goal-getting? Here's how to reach your professional, financial, and personal potential–starting now!
Polka Dot/Thinkstock
Ah, unfinished tasks. Maybe it's that partially painted room in your house, a somewhat organized closet, or a folder full of research on stock options (but no stock). We all have those little reminders of good intentions gone astray. The trick to following through? Starting right. Studies show that getting off to a promising start triggers a positive chain reaction and makes it more likely you'll be successful and finish the job. "The stronger your start, the easier it will be to shift your focus to the end result and get past that tricky no-man's-land in between," says Art Markman, Ph.D., a psychology professor at the University of Texas and author of Smart Thinking: Three Essential Keys to Solve Problems, Innovate, and Get Things Done. Here, start-for-success strategies to achieve seven common goals.
The Start-Smart Strategy for Success
Want to turn goal-setting into goal-getting? Here's how to reach your professional, financial, and personal potential–starting now!
Published: May 1, 2012  |  By Caitlin Carlson













Goal 1: Create a Better First Impression
Start here: When meeting a new guy, don't freak— even if you're at your college pal's birthday party and she abruptly disappears after introducing you to one of her new colleagues. The key to a great conversation is starting off right. Make him feel at ease by stepping to his side, says Patti Wood, a communications and body language expert and author of Snap: Making the Most of First Impressions. "While women like to chat face-to-face because it makes them feel heard and understood, this direct approach can make men feel as if they're facing an opponent, which will put them on the defensive," says Wood. Before there's time for an awkward silence to set in, "jump right in with a 'best' or 'favorite' question, like 'What's your favorite band?' (if there's music playing) or 'What's the
best cocktail you've ever had?'" she suggests. Positive-charged, springboard questions like these also work well in other potentially awkward situations, like, ahem, dinner with your new boyfriend's parents.
Goal 2: Get a Job you Love
Start here: Minimize trolling the Web for job openings and sending your résumé out into the abyss, says Anita Attridge, a career and executive coach. Fifty percent of jobs are never posted online, and 80 percent are obtained through networking or direct contact, according to The Five O'Clock Club, a national career coaching and outplacement organization. Build your network by first determining the industry, position, and geographic area of interest to you. Then identify specific companies you'd like to work for, and either call the company or search using LinkedIn to track down the direct contact info of the person who is in the position to hire you (e.g., the manager of the department that interests you). On
LinkedIn.com, check to see if you have any connections to that person or know anyone else at the company who may be able to clue you in on unlisted job openings. After all, 82 percent of the Fortune 100 companies from 2011 found job candidates using LinkedIn, and more than 2 million companies are listed on it.
Once you identify the person who is in a position to hire you, send a targeted letter to introduce yourself. Keep it brief, but be sure to include two or three bulleted accomplishments in addition to your skills and qualifications, says Attridge. Sign off with a request to meet in person for a half-hour informational meeting, and follow up with a call in the early morning or late afternoon to schedule it. The average number of calls it will take to reach a person is eight, so leave a message the first time and continue calling until you speak directly to the person.
Goal 3: Save Money for Retirement
Start here: "Speak with the HR department of your company and sign up for its 401(k), if one is offered," says Erin Botsford, CEO of The Botsford Group, a wealth-management firm. Contributing to your 401(k) is by far the easiest and most beneficial way to
save for retirement. "If your company matches your contribution, this is basically the equivalent of getting free money from your company, and you won't have to pay taxes on any of it until you take it out to use it," says Botsford. Ask your benefits coordinator in HR for the specifics and whether there's a certain amount of time you'll have to work there before the company's contribution becomes yours. Use an investment calculator online (try Dinkytown.net) to figure out exactly how much you'll have when you reach the age of 65 (if you invest $675 a month and get an average annual return of 8 percent, you can rack up over a million bucks after 30 years!). Within your 401(k), you get to decide how to invest all that hard-earned cash. The further you are from retiring, the more risks you can afford to take, so it may make sense to consider investing in stock mutual funds or ETFs since they traditionally outperform most other options. As you get closer to retiring, move your money to more stable investments, like money-market accounts, bonds, and stable value accounts. If you're self-employed or don't have the option of a 401(k), you can sign up for a tax-advantaged IRA. Start right (and ASAP!) and by the time you're ready to retire, you'll be able to turn all those earnings into a condo in sunny Florida.
Goal 4: Improve Your Diet
Start here: First, think about what you can add to your diet, not what you need to take out. "Instead of depriving or restricting yourself, think about food groups you may not be getting enough of," says Shana Sporman, a registered dietitian in Boston. If you rarely eat anything green, aim to eat at least one serving of
colorful produce (of any hue!) with lunch and dinner. When eaten consistently, these high-fiber foods can make you feel fuller longer, boost your energy, and improve digestion. Your body's natural biology craves this variety and balance, which studies show also affects your mood and ability to focus. Next, think about where you're overdoing it. If you need to tame that sweet tooth, start by making small, sustainable changes instead of going cold turkey. Substitute one pack of sweetener in your coffee for two, and instead of a scoop of ice cream, have a scoop of Greek yogurt covered with berries, or mix half a cup of regular Cheerios with your usual frosted O's. By easing into a big lifestyle change, whether it's cutting back on sugar or going organic, you'll be more likely to stick to it and be successful.
Goal 5: Redecorate Your Bedroom
Start here: Begin with your bed. It's the focal point of your bedroom, and something as simple as a new bedspread or duvet cover can transform the whole room and inspire a theme or color palette for the rest of your project. "Buy a new headboard (you can pick up a freestanding upholstered headboard for around $200 at Target) or fake it with a couple of 26-inch European square pillows with matching shams propped against the wall behind your regular pillows and throw pillows," says Lauri Ward, home design expert at Redecorate.com. A tailored bed skirt in the same fabric will tie the chic look together. Don't worry–it'll make the room feel symmetrical and relaxing, not matchy-matchy. Then think balance. Even if you live alone, buy a mate for your bedside table. (Note: The tables don't necessarily have to match, but if they're wood, they should have matching finishes.) Top the pair with matching lamps. "Just like shoes, you can never have too many pairs of anything, be it pillows, frames, or lamps," says Ward.
Goal 6: Start a Blog or Twitter Account
Start here: Whether you're creating a blog or a Twitter account, start by uploading your photo. "The default Twitter egg avatar is a common identifier of spam accounts, so adding a photo (headshots work best!) encourages others to follow you," says Steve Birkett, a new-media specialist who blogs at riseabovethestatic.com. Plus, a photo shows you've put some time into crafting your profile and gives potential followers an idea of who you are. Get your first tweet out there on a Tuesday, the busiest day for Twitter, according to studies. Introduce yourself in your first tweet with something like, "Starting to tweet! I'm an accountant in NYC, passionate about all things Web and music," and include a link to your blog if you have one. Start by tweeting three or four times a day, spaced out as evenly as possible. (The number of daily tweets varies greatly from user to user, so adjust your strategy however you'd like.) Your first blog post is crucial because it sets the scene for future posts. Put it up on Monday morning–people are most active online on weekday mornings, and getting it up early in the week is your best bet, says Birkett. Build a base of four to five posts before you really start talking it up. "Your visitors will have something substantial to dig in to, and the longer they stick around, the more likely they will be to subscribe," says Birkett. Subscription options are key, so make sure it's easy for visitors to subscribe to your RSS feed or to sign up via e-mail!
Goal 7: Freshen Up Your Look
Start here: "Your eyebrows can make or break your whole look—messy brows draw attention to other imperfections, such as less-than-perfect skin or messy makeup, while a defined brow shape makes everything look more symmetrical and polished," says Emily Kate Warren, a makeup artist in San Francisco. Make sure you have good light (natural light or a lighted makeup mirror works best) and tweeze any strays that are totally out of line. Then, brush hairs upward and use a blunt-ended eyebrow pencil (like SormĂ© eyebrow pencil in soft gray for dark hair or soft blonde for lighter hair, available at Amazon.com) to draw little dashes anywhere you see skin. Already got the perfect brows? Pick up a new blush in a fun, bright color. You'll instantly
look more energized, and studies show that men are drawn to women with flushed cheeks. When females of many primate species become fertile, their estrogen levels peak, opening up their blood vessels and turning their faces bright red. This flushed complexion seems to give males the signal that it's time to make their move. The same could be true for humans. In a previous study, scientists showed that men seem to be more attracted to women clothed in red rather than in a neutral color such as white. Men interpreted the red outfit as a signal that the woman was more open to sexual advances. Keep the color concentration on the apples of your cheeks and dust a finishing swipe across your nose.




Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com. Also check out Patti's YouTube channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.