5 Ways to Be More Outgoing. Tips for Introverts for Networking and Parties.
Your invited to banquet, a networking event or party for work. What is your first thought? If your answer is, "That will be tiring and possible uncomfortable." You are not alone. I am an introvert. Recently I was invited to a banquet before a speaking event and my first thought was "I can have a good time, but it may be hard." The newest research shows that outgoing people are happier. As an introvert myself I think that may be others measure happiness. Introverts enjoy being by ourselves! It makes us happy. And we find it fun, but it can be draining to socialize, especially with people we don't know. I research and speak on first impressions to find and perfect ways to make it easier to meet greet and socialize with others. If you want use great first impression body language and make effortless small talk for easy meeting and greeting here are tips for introverts or anyone who wants easy ways to make socializing easier.
5 Ways to Be More Outgoing
A quick body language trick you can use when approaching someone you are about to meet for the first time is to briefly flash your eyebrows upward when you’re about 15 feet away. “It helps you feel more open and receptive and tells the other person that you’re friendly,” says Patti Wood, author of "." This quick facial move is especially helpful for introverts who tend to freeze in place. (Practice your open-and-friendly look in the mirror first so you don’t slip into deer-in-the-headlights territory). Next, when you’re within about six feet, extend your arm firmly with your palm open to shake hands. “Hesitation about offering a hand can make it awkward,” says Wood. Sticking it right out there for a good, firm shake preempts the stress response and helps eliminate some of the anxiety.
One thing true extroverts are great at is taking the initiative to talk to people and make new friends. If that doesn’t come naturally to you, set a goal to engage one person every week. “A new friend will give you the opportunity to learn more about yourself and grow,” Wood says. Maybe she’ll introduce you to a great book, or more: “Countless studies have shown that friendships and social support have a beneficial impact on health. They make good times better and tough times easier to manage,” says , a Denver-based behavioral scientist. “We’re all —even introverts.” Go in with a game plan: Open with meet-and-greet questions like “where are you from?” and “what do you do?” They may seem lame, but they actually serve an important purpose. “You’re searching for a commonality,” Wood says. It’s how you establish whether the person is like you. Things as simple as finding out where someone grew up and mentioning that your brother now lives there can create an instantaneous bond of shared experience. Bring up sports, movies, music or the latest Housewives drama. Even talking about the weather can work. If there’s something that perks the other person up, dig deeper. Try to get him or her talking for more than a minute. “It used to be much more natural for people to share stories, but we now have much shorter interactions that are more like e-mails or texts,” Wood says. “We need to put in the time for deeper and longer conversations.”
No, we’re not talking about instant messaging. Find the spot at work where people tend to congregate and jump into the water-cooler chitchat, recommends Wood. Set a goal that you’ll go to the break room, bench or wherever it may be on Tuesdays for five minutes. (Shooting for Tuesday rather than Monday will keep you from agonizing over the weekend.) Start small and each Tuesday do something to be more social and friendly with your co-workers. If there’s someone that you’ve found some common ground with, ask them if they want to grab lunch with you.
When you do go to lunch with a co-worker or new friend, try to skew the conversation toward positive stories as much as possible. “If you spend 15 minutes talking about your car breaking down, there will be a negative association with you,” Wood says. Instead, talk about a fabulous meal you enjoyed at a new restaurant in town, or your favorite yoga studio. It will make you seem more likeable while your friendship is still in a budding phase. “Fledgling relationships can’t handle negativity,” says Hartman. While there’s nothing wrong with a little bit of griping (bad moods happen to good people, after all), make an effort to always switch it to a positive topic toward the end of the meal. It can be as simple as, “It was great talking to you, let’s do this again.” Remember, like the sweet finish of dessert, the last thing you say will linger in the memory of the other person.
Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com. Also check out Patti's YouTube channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.