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Showing posts with label kissing. Show all posts
Showing posts with label kissing. Show all posts

7 Signals That You Should Stay Together As a Couple

7 Signals That You Should Stay Together As a Couple



1.      You still sleep close together and touching in some way. One of the most important differences involved touching, with 94% of couples who spent the night in contact with one another were happy with their relationship, compared to just 68% of those that didn't touch.” with 86% of those who slept less than an inch apart from their partner being happy with their relationship, compared to only 66% of those who slept more than 30 inches apart.

2.      You still make each other laugh.

3.      You still go to them to kiss or in some way welcome them when they come home and or you kiss or embrace when you say goodbye.

4.      You still want to listen when they are sharing a bad day or rough time.


5.      You still want to fix them a snack or bring them tea or coffee, or want to do small actions of nurturing and kindness.

6.      You lean your head on their shoulder or he still kisses you on top of your head or that other special spot.

7.      You still go to bed at the same time and talk.




Patti Wood, MA - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com.
     

Research on Kissing Shows That Men Report That They Get More Intimate Kisses from Their Female Partner While Women Report Half as Many Kisses Per Day Than Men.

Research on Kissing Shows That Men Report 
That They Get More Intimate Kisses
 from Their Female Partner 
While Women Report Half as Many Kisses
 Per Day Than Men.

74% of the men reported higher intimate kiss frequencies than the women of the same couple. This resulted in a reported average of ten kisses per day from the males, twice that of the female reported average of five per day.

There are gender differences in how many kisses we think we give and receive a day.

Story Source:
The above story is based on materials provided by BioMed CentralNote: Materials may be edited for content and length.


Journal Reference:

1.     Remco Kort, Martien Caspers, Astrid van de Graaf, Wim van Egmond, Bart Keijser, Guus Roeselers. Shaping the oral microbiota through intimate kissingMicrobiome, 2014; 2 (1): 41 DOI: 10.1186/2049-2618-2-41


Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com. Also check out Patti's YouTube channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.

Kissing Can Helps Us Choose a Mate and Strengthen the Bond Between Mates


 
One of my favorite TV shows is THE GOOD WIFE, though my favorite part of the show are the courtroom scenes I have noticed that their is a lot of kissing on the show and recently the kissing has been hot and heavy for the husband and wife lead characters that makes sense as it strengthens the bond between mates.
  Last Valentines day I was on the Steve Harvey show talking about kissing and how men dose their kissing mates with testosterone that makes women a bit more amorous and recent research informs us that another purpose of kissing is vet the suitability of a potential mate.
 
Here is the article I read in The Times.
 
There are activities common to most humans that we enjoy immensely, without much thought, and as frequently as opportunity and instinct provide. On occasion, researchers feel they need to know why.
Recently, experimental psychologists at Oxford University explored the function of kissing in romantic relationships.
Surprise! It’s complicated.
After conducting an online survey with 308 men and 594 women, mostly from North America and Europe, who ranged in age from 18 to 63, the researchers have concluded that kissing may help people assess potential mates and then maintain those relationships.
“The repurposing of the behavior is very efficient,” said Rafael Wlodarski, a doctoral candidate and lead author of the study, published in Archives of Sexual Behavior.
But another hypothesis about kissing — that its function is to elevate sexual arousal and ready a couple for coitus — didn’t hold up. While that might be an outcome, researchers did not find sexual arousal to be the primary driver for kissing.
Participants in the survey were asked about their attitudes toward kissing in different phases of romantic relationships. They were then asked about their sexual history: for example, whether they had been more inclined toward casual encounters or long-term, committed relationships. They also had to define their “mate value” by assessing their own attractiveness. Later, during data analysis, the researchers looked at how individual differences affected a person’s thoughts on kissing.
Earlier research had suggested that in a new relationship, a romantic kiss serves to pull two relative strangers into each other’s space, their faces glued together, possibly transmitting pheromonal, sensory, even genetic cues to each other’s brain. This could be a kind of primal interview: Could this person be mating material?
Mr. Wlodarski’s results suggest a more nuanced dynamic.
The participants generally rated kissing in casual relationships as most important before sex, less important during sex, even less important after sex and least important “at other times.” (To clarify: researchers defined kissing as “on the lips or open-mouth (French).”)
Past research has shown that three types of people tend to be choosier in selecting mates who are genetically fit and compatible: women, those who rate themselves highly attractive, and those favoring casual sex. In this study, these people said that kissing was important mostly at the start of a relationship.
That may be because for these individuals, kissing turns out to be a quick, easy way to sample a partner’s suitability — a subconscious stop-go light. For them, “The Shoop Shoop Song (It’s in His Kiss)” might not be far off the mark.
After that first kiss, these types are much more likely than other subjects to change their minds about a potential partner, researchers found. If it’s not in his kiss, forget about him.
But other people might use different criteria to size up their mates: men, those who rate themselves as less sexually attractive, and people looking for commitment. In the grand search for a partner, these individuals screen for people who seem to have the inclination and resources for the long haul. And for them, this study showed, kissing has a lower priority at the beginning of dating.
Particularly for men and women looking for long-term relationships, kissing serves other purposes, like relationship upkeep. They would use their orbicularis oris muscle to mediate, ameliorate and sustain their connections. They rated kissing equally important before sex and at “other times not related to sex.” For these participants, kissing was least important during sex.
Among the study’s participants who said they were in exclusive relationships, frequency of kissing, rather than of sexual intercourse, was best correlated with relationship happiness.
“You would think that intercourse would be even more bonding, more intimate, but that’s not necessarily so,” Mr. Wlodarski said. “Maybe you have a happy relationship and you don’t need more intercourse.” For contented couples, he said, kissing continued to be a conveyor of emotion.
Justin R. Garcia, an evolutionary biologist at the Kinsey Institute at Indiana University and a scientific adviser to Match.com who was not involved in this research, noted that kissing was so closely associated with emotional connection that sex workers often refuse to kiss their customers, insisting that it is “too intimate.”
Kissing has been shaped by both society and biology, Mr. Wlodarski noted. “In many cultures, kissing was one of the first opportunities for individuals to get close enough to sniff each other in socially acceptable ways,” he said. The Inuit press their nostrils on the cheeks or forehead of someone for whom they feel great affection, gently inhaling their scent.
Dr. Garcia, a co-author of “Evolution and Human Sexual Behavior,” said that the Oxford study contributed to growing research into factors that promote or discourage happy romantic and sexual relationships. “We really only understand a small portion of that,” he said. “But we know that physical contact, specifically good quality touch, is really important for long-term relationships.”
And perhaps not just for humans. Some animal species approximate what humans would call kissing. Chimpanzees press their mouths together. Certain parrots tap their beaks. Elephants put the tips of their trunks in one another’s mouths and swirl them about. “It’s what we biologists call an affiliative gesture,” Dr. Garcia said.
Some in Hollywood have managed to divine some of the subtleties of kissing without the benefit of Oxford researchers.
Michelle King, who with her husband, Robert, is a co-creator of CBS’s “The Good Wife,” thinks a great deal about whether and when her sexually charged characters lock lips. “We put even more emphasis on kissing than sex,” she said. “We treat it as though it has more emotional import.”
Referring to Alicia Florrick (played by Julianna Margulies), who has a wary relationship with her husband Peter (Chris Noth), Ms. King remarked, “You see Alicia having sex with Peter more frequently and recreationally than her kissing him.”
But referring to the characters Diane Lockhart (Christine Baranski) and Kurt McVeigh (Gary Cole), older people who have just gotten married, Ms. King said, “you only see kissing with them, and a fair amount of it. There’s a soulful connection there, and the kissing is more conventionally romantic.”
Still, she understood that viewers might wonder why the couple has not yet been seen having sex. “Production difficulties got in the way,” she said.
A version of this article appears in print on 10/29/2013, on page D6 of the NewYork edition with the headline: Now, a Kiss Isn’t Just a Kiss.


Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com. Also check out Patti's YouTube channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.

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Dear Patti


After you kiss your sweetie this Valentine's Day, you may want to share with him or her how the ritual of kissing, (also known by it's scientific term Osculation) improves your health and the quality of your relationship. You can read about the "Secret Benefits of Kissing" in this month's first article.
This month I was in Chicago to do a segment on Kissing Secrets with comedian and talk show host Steve Harvey and traveled to Miami, Savannah and beautiful Cancun Mexico to speak on body language, selling and dynamic presentation skills. I hope to be in your city soon.
Here are this month's articles and TV interview links.

Video of HLN interview of the body language of suspected murderer Jodi Arias while she is on the witness stand during her trial.
Toronto Sun article about how personal items displayed at work convey messages.
This Valentine's Day you may want to catch my interview on Kissing with comedian and author, Steve Harvey on his show about kissing. It airs on NBC on Thursday at 1 pm EST.
Take Care,
Patti
PS - If you would like your team, company or association to learn to use the benefits of body language, email Dorothy@PattiWood.net

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A baby cries when he is hungry, a teenager whines when she doesn't get her way, a boss yells when he wants something done right now, a customer rants when she has to wait. When a person does not get what they want, when they want it, they can quickly turn into a difficult person. We all have needs and when those needs are not met we yell, cry, whine and in other equally annoying ways become difficult people. The number one reason we fail to deal with a difficult person is we fail to recognize their need...what made them difficult in the first place? So to prevent the crying, whining, yelling and ranting figure out what a person needs - and if you can, give it to him. Here are four basic human needs and how you can meet them and prevent conflict without losing time, energy or your own temper. Avoid Conflict by offering Comfort.
Comfort - When someone needs comforting, comfort him or her. A few years ago someone broke into my mother's retirement condominium. She got up in the morning to make her tea and toast and there was a drunken man, passed out cold on her couch. My mom was frightened and upset. Two days later, after the break-in was mentioned in the paper and was the talk of the retirement home, one of my mother's friends who she had not talked to since the break-in, called my mother and asked her out to dinner. My mother was hurt, her friend didn't talk about the break-in, nor did she mention why she hadn't checked in with my mother for two days. My mother got very upset and told her friend she did not want to have dinner with her and why which led to an argument between the two friends. What caused the argument and the rejected invitation? An unmet need. What need did the friend not meet? Comfort. My mother wanted her friend to say, "I am sorry this frightening event happened." And along with that, to visit her and give her a hug. However, her friend for whatever reason had not called her in two days and when she did she didn't mention the break-in. My mother simply wanted to be comforted and given attention and her friend did not meet that basic need.
Prevent conflict by... continue


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Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com. Also check out Patti's YouTube channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.

Patti on the Steve Harvey Show during "LOVE WEEK"

Patti will be on the Steve Harvey Show for his annual "LOVE WEEK" sharing her insights on Kissing on February 13th at 1 pm, EST.  You can view the show on NBC. If you miss the show, watch Patti's blog for a future post in which we will have the entire segment for your viewing. 

Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com. Also check out Patti's YouTube channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.

Why Kissing is Important to Sex


Why kissing is so important. The limbic system, what some researchers call the primitive brain is where our bodily functions, such as heart rate, breathing, and perspiration our controlled automatically.  The limbic system is the center for controlling our actions that insure our survival and having sex ( to insure the survival or our species.)
Kissing is important because it actually excites the limbic brain center so that that it “command central” can send the cascade of hormones that increase the libido and prepare the body to have sex.  It is up to the cerebral cortex, also called the new brain, where logic and conscious thought occurs to put the brakes on or stop us from having sex with the wrong partner or at the wrong time or to monitor the process enough to ensure we have safe sex.

Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com. Also check out Patti's YouTube channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.