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Body Language read of Will and Jada Smith




Will Smith and Jada Pinkett Smith brought the ice to the Vanity Fair Oscar party in March, according to Patti "the tightness of Jada's neck, head and mouth shows that she is angry."  Will exudes warmth - toward the camera but not her,
Their affections heated up when they hit the beach on June 9.  "Jada is pushing her heart up to him and Will's belly is pressed against her and his whole face is pointing toward her.  They have a sensual and a spiritual connection , observes Patti.

Patti gives this couple in March a 2 on the True Love Rating scale for Life & Style

Patti gives this couple in June a 5 on the True Love Rating scale for Life & Style


Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com. Also check out Patti's YouTube channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.

Johnny & Amber - Chill in the Air


Engagements are meant to be blissful, but Johnny Depp, 50, and Amber Heard, 28, didn't get the memo.  At a May 6 event, Johnny forced a smile and put his arm around Amber, but Patti observes that Amber is not giving herself fully.  The way she holds her arm over her pelvis shows she has been harmed by infidelity.  The ice barely thawed as Amber visited Johnny on set June 2, notice how Amber has crossed her arms in front as he kisses her.  As if she does not want to be kissed!

Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com. Also check out Patti's YouTube channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.

Magic Phrases


When you get nonverbal signals such as comfort cues around a particular topic there are magic phrases that you can use to get the person to tell you the truth about what's going on. 

What can I do to make you feel comfortable talking about this? 

I know you'll feel so much better if we can talk about what's going on.

I know you'll feel so much better and the tension you're feeling will ease as soon as you share what's going on. 

  
When giving coaching or criticism or asking for a change in behavior you want the person you're giving the coaching to to feel comfortable listening to you fully and assure them that the working relationship is important. 
Especially for supporters and influencers on the disc personality assessment who are people that are focused and they need to know you will still like them after you criticize them.  You need to make them know you value them as team members

I value our working relationship 

I want you to know as I share a way to take your game to a new level this is about your game not about you. 

Let's talk about a way you can play even better for the team.

I value you as a team member.

  
After you've given somebody an assignment you can ask some of these questions.

What's the best way to make this happen quickly? 

Is this the best way to make this happen easily?

What would be a barrier to making this happen?

What would keep this from being able to happen quickly and easily?

What are your concerns going forward with this?

What are your top three concerns going forward with it?

What are two thoughts you have about this project? 

I don't know if I've been clear with this assignment or not can you pretend like you're sending me an email to do it and tell me what you'd say in the email? 

What are the questions that you have about what I expect from you on this?

What would make this easy to do or what would make this easier to do? 

What would be the challenges to making this? 

What would be the first thing that you would need to do to make this happen?

What would be the first to make this happen?

When you get back to your desk what will you need to make this happen?

What can I do to make you feel comfortable talking about this?



Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com. Also check out Patti's YouTube channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.

Walking Styles of Men and What They Reveal

Patti was interviewed by Men's Health on the walking style of men.  Check the link below to read her insights.

http://www.menshealth.com/best-life/walking-style

Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com. Also check out Patti's YouTube channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.

Looks Can Deceive



Nuzzling Casper Smart, 27, at an Oscars afterparty in 2012, Jennifer Lopez, 44, looks like she is focused on her beau. Not so, observes Patti.  "She's posing for the camera.  Her heart is centered on the camera.  And her eyes are not on him."

By contrast, at this year's Billboard Music Awards, J. Lo wasn't as tuned-out as she appears.  "Her body is more turned toward him and she has a playful energy.  It tells Patti that there is some playfulness in their relationship.

Patti gives this couple in 2012 a 3 on the Life & Style True Love Rating scale.

Patti gives this couple in May of 2014 a 4 1/2 on the Life & Style True Love Rating scale.

Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com. Also check out Patti's YouTube channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.

How to Read Your Date's Body Language - Clue #5

Body-language clue #5: The Stance
Compatibility clues are even located in an area that’s ordinarily overlooked: The feet. “Where the feet go, the heart follows,” says Wood. “The lower portion of the body is under the least control, and the feet are the most telling of how someone feels.” So if your date is thinking, “Hey, I really like this person,” his feet will move towards you—say, he’ll stretch his legs out under the table at dinner. That’s a very clear declaration of “Let’s get closer.” - See more at: http://www.match.com/magazine/article/13075/Read-Your-Dates-Body-Language/D#sthash.FLOIn7dP.dpuf


Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com. Also check out Patti's YouTube channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.

How to Read Your Date's Body Language - Clue #4

Body-language clue #4: The Distance Part of body language is not just what you do with your body, but how close you position it to the person you’re dating. “If someone’s not interested in you,” says Wood, “they’ll leave a lot of space between your body and theirs... two feet or so. But if a person sits or stands right next to you, or even 16 inches away, that reveals physical intimacy—and real romantic interest.” - See more at: http://www.match.com/magazine/article/13075/Read-Your-Dates-Body-Language/D#sthash.FLOIn7dP.dpuf



Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com. Also check out Patti's YouTube channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.

How to Read Your Date's Body Language - Clue #3

Body-language clue #3: The Blink
While some people give you full-on eye contact when they’re interested, here’s another little-known sign that your date is way 


into you: Frequent blinking. “When you’re highly attracted to someone,” says Wood, “one of the natural responses is to get nervous and blink a lot.” So if that cutie across the table seems a little flustered and is batting his or her lashes a lot, congratulations—someone’s interested in you.
- See more at: http://www.match.com/magazine/article/13075/Read-Your-Dates-Body-Language/D#sthash.FLOIn7dP.dpuf



Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com. Also check out Patti's YouTube channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.

Read Your Date's Body Language - Clue #2

Body-language clue #2: The Mimic
Another sign of interest involves the hands and then some—it’s something called “matching and mirroring.” What’s that? It’s when your date mimics your gestures, voice inflections and patterns of communication. And it’s a good thing. “Their voice will speed up if yours does, or slow down with yours,” says Wood. “It happens subconsciously—when we’re attracted, we tend to merge into one another in this way.” If you’re noticing that this happens on the first date — your date is shrugging the way you do when sharing a story, or places his complicated dinner order in the same joking way you do — well, chances are there will be a second date.
- See more at: http://www.match.com/magazine/article/13075/Read-Your-Dates-Body-Language/D#sthash.FLOIn7dP.dpuf


Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com. Also check out Patti's YouTube channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.

How to Read Your Date's Body Language - Clue #1

Body-language clue #1: The Reachhttp://images.match.com/match/s.gif
The first universal sign of interest is something called symbolic reaching: “It’s when your hand is subtly reaching toward the other person,” says Wood. An example of this, on a dinner date, is resting one’s arm and hand on the table, rather than close to the body, with fingers pointing to the other person—as though you’re ready to reach out and touch them. (And if your date does reach out and touch, so much the better: That’s an iron-clad sign of affection.) On the other hand, if someone sits on their hands or conceals them, that indicates a lack of interest.

http://www.match.com/magazine/article/13075/Read-Your-Dates-Body-Language/D

Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com. Also check out Patti's YouTube channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.

Patti in Prevention Magazine - The Dark Side of a Man's Smile



http://m.prevention.com/mind-body/emotional-health/mens-smiles-make-women-subordinate-study


Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com. Also check out Patti's YouTube channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.

How to Decode Your Kid's Body Language


Little ones use a lot of silent signals to communicate, but we've got ways to read their body language.  Click the link below to read Patti's insights she shared with Parents Magazine.

http://www.parents.com/toddlers-preschoolers/development/behavioral/how-to-decode-your-kids-body-language/?page=1


Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com. Also check out Patti's YouTube channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.


Patti is Quoted in Body Language Exposed - Find Out How Your Body Can Betray You


Link to Book


Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com. Also check out Patti's YouTube channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.

Patti is Quoted in "How to Date Like a Grownup"

Tip #17: Be Fluent in Body Language
The key to using body language to attract the opposite sex is in making yourself
as approachable as possible.
Basically, you want to send the guy a message that he won’t get shot down
immediately if he tries to spark a conversation with you. Otherwise, he may never get the
nerve up to try.
First, avoid folding your arms, and don’t chew on gum, ice, or your fingernails.
Body-language experts say that the chewing indicates anxiety, frustration, or general
unrest—none of which are very attractive emotions.
According to body-language expert Patti Wood, you want to make yourself a
“safe” (read “approachable”) target. How do you accomplish that?
Don’t take up a lot of space (which, in body-language terms, is a sign of power
and superiority). So keep your stance feminine (feet less than six inches apart, toes turned
slightly inward) and your posture relaxed. According to Wood, “We are strong women,
but remember, we’re trying to get a man to come over and talk to us.” She explains, “You
have to show you have room for someone else in your life.”

Link to Book

Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com. Also check out Patti's YouTube channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.

What is the New Definition of a Hero? Who do we need to save us?

We have changed how we define a hero.  We use to talk about a hero being a strong, brave person who swoops in to save the day or a leader of men who fights the bad guy but now we are looking for a different kind of person. A person who seems just as rare and magical as Superman, in his red cape, flying through the sky. We are looking for an honest person, a credible human being, a person of integrity and a person we can call our True North.

I say this hero is rare because in my programs and book, SNAP, I ask people to think of someone in their life that embodies these characteristics and some people can’t think of one person with integrity they have known in their lives. It seems we are living in a time when so many people are screaming out lies we think everyone is dishonest.

In the exercise in my program, I ask everyone to remember an honest person from their lives and recall how they felt or feel in their presence. I ask them to do this so that they recognize when they are with someone new they can do a sense recall and see if the new person they meet makes them feel the same way, safe and good. We need to recognize a hero’s energy, the way a hero speaks and moves. A person of integrity is fully present with you, they make contact with you, and they lean forward and truly listen. We need our hero and we need to know what safe and good feels like. Then we can draw the good guys into our lives and we can model their goodness.

We also need to know what it feels like to be with a good guy or gal to protect ourselves. If we know how good it feels to be with a person of goodness and integrity then when we are with the opposite, (someone that makes us feel stressed, uncomfortable, wary and less than,) we know this is not how we are supposed to feel.  Just like the good guys contrast with the bad guys in super hero movies, we need heroes in our lives so we can recognize the bad guys.

 Last night I watched a special on PBS about Mr. Rodgers. A journalist, Tim Madigan, wrote a book about his friendship with that extraordinary hero. He said Mr. Rodgers made him feel safe and accepted. Sounds like a hero to me. I think we have a new hero for our time.  A hero who is confident, with no hidden agendas, with new super powers, speaking softly and honestly, someone who wants to be in the moment listening to our fears and dreams and wearing a soft red sweater not a red cape.

The full exercise and the definition and behaviors of a True North Hero from my book, “SNAP Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma.” follow.  

Your True North

How do we know what credibility is and whether the person we’re meeting is credible? How can we know he’s credible within seconds of meeting him?

I do an interesting exercise with my audiences. I say, “I’d like you to think about person in your life who you think is the most credible person you know. There is something about them makes you feel absolutely safe in their presence. You can believe them. What is it about them makes you feel that way? What kind of behavior do they demonstrate? What do they say? Are there things they do with their hands, their body that makes you tell yourself ‘This person has integrity”?

As they share stories and describe this honest true person in their lives, whether it is their first boss, their mother, their high school teacher I notice  their voices grow warm and pause with wonder , their bodies unfold as they describe them. I call this person your “True North.”

Take a moment now to think of a person who is a True North in your life. Someone you trust to be honest, who is authentic and true think how you feel in their presence.  If you have someone like this in your life, you can recognize what it’s like to be in the presence of someone who truly demonstrates credibility.  If you have a “True North,” You can compare each person you meet for the first time against this person and see if it feels as comfortable and trusting.

“True North” is a benchmark. Once you know it, you should be able calibrate within split seconds that “this feels good” or “something is just not right there.” When somebody has that credibility factor in first impressions, it typically feels very safe and comfortable to be with them. There’s an authenticity you don’t get with most people.

The Definition of Credibility is Universal

Some people think credibility is something you learn about a person over time but it’s not true. When somebody is their authentic self, exactly who they are with no façade, you have a visceral feeling in their presence. This is who they are. Call them credible, authentic or real, you believe them from their facial expressions to their actions. And here’s something even more interesting: If somebody is credible, they’re credible to everybody. Other people see them the same way you do. It is consistent.

It really comes down to evolution. We are hard-wired to pick up on credibility. The first impression in the basic survival instinct asks, “Can I trust this person?  Can I feel safe in their presence? Are they going to pull a knife out? No, I can believe what I’m seeing as the real thing.” Credibility is vital and primary.

Long before I realized that there were four first impression factors, I used to ask my audiences and my class participants, “What is the first thing you notice when you meet somebody?” They would partner with each other and share their answers. Remarkably, class after class, year after year, would share the same answers: trustworthy, credible, authentic, honest, integrity. All of these traits make up credibility. These were the first things they noticed. Years later, I found the research that says the
first thing we look for is credibility. I didn’t need the research to tell me.

When somebody is “True North,” you know they’re going to be this way every single time. When you find somebody who is credible, you don’t have to go through the “fight or flight” response. Your body can say, “Okay, I’m safe.”



Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert.
For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net.
Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First
Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com.
check out Patti's YouTube channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.



Job Interview Body Language Top Tips and What NOT to do - Essence Magazine Interviews Patti Wood

Essence Magazine asked me to give three tips for interview body language that may surprise you.

  1. Don’t keep your hands in your lap. Keep hands in view, ideally open showing the palms of the hands to show openness and confidence and approachability.
  2. Don’t always make eye contact. While you should maintain eye contact with the interviewer when they are speaking,  it's ok if you look away as you are talking and forming your thoughts. In fact, it may be necessary to look away.   
  3. Don’t ever cross your arms.  It's not as horrible as you might think to cross your arms. It’s not the ideal posture but, you may need a brief arm cross to comfort yourself like a little self-hug during an interview. But only do it once or twice and make it very brief. Because research shows that if you do you retain 38% percent less information, have higher levels of stress and a more negative view of whoever is speaking. 
Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com. Also check out Patti's YouTube channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.

Baffled by body language? How to decode the silent signals.



Match.com article


By Stephen F. Milioti 

ords are nice, and who doesn’t love flowers? But, that said, if you really, really want to know how someone feels about you, the answer lies in body language. That’s right: Learning how to read someone’s body language is one of the best ways to sniff out a ripe romantic match.

For a turbo-charged tutorial on the subject, we asked the expert: Patti Wood (pattiwood.net), who’s analyzed the body language of everyone from the most 

You can send up to 10,000 body language cues in less than a minute.
recent presidential candidates to on-the-rocks celeb couples. “You can send up to 10,000 body language cues in less than a minute,” says Wood. “And there’s no way to control all of them—even if you’re sly.” While some factors will influence body language (for instance, if a person is super-shy), there are some sure signs of attraction to look for. We offer up the top five for you here:

Body-language clue #1: The Reach
The first universal sign of interest is something called symbolic reaching: “It’s when your hand is subtly reaching toward the other person,” says Wood. An example of this, on a dinner date, is resting one’s arm and hand on the table, rather than close to the body, with fingers pointing to the other person—as though you’re ready to reach out and touch them. (And if your date does reach out and touch, so much the better: That’s an iron-clad sign of affection.) On the other hand, if someone sits on their hands or conceals them, that indicates a lack of interest.

Body-language clue #2: The Mimic
Another sign of interest involves the hands and then some—it’s something called “matching and mirroring.” What’s that? It’s when your date mimics your gestures, voice inflections and patterns of communication. And it’s a good thing. “Their voice will speed up if yours does, or slow down with yours,” says Wood. “It happens subconsciously—when we’re attracted, we tend to merge into one another in this way.” If you’re noticing that this happens on the first date — your date is shrugging the way you do when sharing a story, or places his complicated dinner order in the same joking way you do — well, chances are there will be a second date.

Body-language clue #3: The Blink
While some people give you full-on eye contact when they’re interested, here’s another little-known sign that your date is way 

The first universal sign of interest is something called symbolic reaching.
into you: Frequent blinking. “When you’re highly attracted to someone,” says Wood, “one of the natural responses is to get nervous and blink a lot.” So if that cutie across the table seems a little flustered and is batting his or her lashes a lot, congratulations—someone’s interested in you.

Body-language clue #4: The Distance
Part of body language is not just what you do with your body, but how close you position it to the person you’re dating. “If someone’s not interested in you,” says Wood, “they’ll leave a lot of space between your body and theirs... two feet or so. But if a person sits or stands right next to you, or even 16 inches away, that reveals physical intimacy—and real romantic interest.”

Body-language clue #5: The Stance
Compatibility clues are even located in an area that’s ordinarily overlooked: The feet. “Where the feet go, the heart follows,” says Wood. “The lower portion of the body is under the least control, and the feet are the most telling of how someone feels.” So if your date is thinking, “Hey, I really like this person,” his feet will move towards you—say, he’ll stretch his legs out under the table at dinner. That’s a very clear declaration of “Let’s get closer.” 


Stephen F. Milioti is a New York-based writer and editor. When he’s interested in a date, he’ll let that be known by playing footsie under the table. - See more at: http://www.match.com/magazine/article/13075/Read-Your-Dates-Body-Language/D#sthash.tAB5kwhh.dpuf

Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com. Also check out Patti's YouTube channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.

I AM QUOTED IN COLLINS DICTIONARY


http://www.collinsdictionary.com/dictionary/english/body-language

Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com. Also check out Patti's YouTube channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.

Three Classic Techniques of Body Language

At the link below are insights on three classic techniques of body language:  body language of attraction, body language of status and body language of deception/dishonesty.

http://www.sciences360.com/index.php/three-classic-techniques-of-body-language-5505/

Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com. Also check out Patti's YouTube channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.