Be The Person That Others Can Trust and Rely On

How we walk with the Broken speaks louder than how we sit with the Great

Angela Buttimer  says, “Great leaders, healers, and sages have demonstrated this truth for centuries. People with this ability have emotional substance, compassion, and character. They are driven by something within that is other-oriented (rather than self-obsessed). It's easy and fun to hang with people when they are on top of their game. Are you able to be there for them when they hit a wall, when they make a misstep, when they dip into the valley? And who will be there for you when you come undone? Too often people invest in others who are unable or unwilling to be there in any meaningful way. Invest in healthy, supportive, and reciprocal relationships. And be the presence others can trust and lean into during difficulties.

Patti Wood, MA - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com.
     

Be the Reason Someone Believes in the Goodness of People - Character Counts and Virtue Matters

What I see in the news today makes me want to be a better person. Instead of focusing on how people “out there” are upset with their bad behavior let’s call forth good behavior in ourselves. Let's be more compassionate and self-aware. 

Every day let's make good choices. Be grateful. Chose to let the driver who wants to pull in your lane in. Talk kindly and respectfully to and about your friends and family. Support them and notice the good things about them. Check yourself and make sure you don't criticize others or discuss what you perceive as their weaknesses behind their back, or do anything to bring down the character of a good-hearted, honest person. Whatever negative behaviors you want to say about someone, hold that behavior up and see how it reflects what you fear in yourself. Amid the negativity and dishonesty, on a grand scale, in our country's government, I suggest we be positive. As we fight corruption and selfishness, that we be fair and generous.

Patti Wood, MA - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com.
     

How Do We Become More Sympathetic and Helpful? What Creates Good Character?

How Do We Become More Sympathetic and Helpful?

What Creates Good Character?

Relationship between sympathy, helping others could provide clues to development of altruism

Recently one of my book groups read David Brooks, “The Road to Character.” It was a fascinating book though I didn't feel the people he chose to write about had character in the way I define it, they did help others through good work. This research article shares insights into how helping others can build sympathy.

Research could help inform interventions to promote positive behaviors in adolescents

Date September 29, 2015

Source: University of Missouri-Columbia

Summary: Developmental psychologists long have debated whether individuals volunteer and help others because they are sympathetic or whether they are sympathetic because they are prosocial. Now, new research helps clarify some of the confusion.

Developmental psychologists long have debated whether individuals volunteer and help others because they are sympathetic or whether they are sympathetic because they are prosocial. Now, new research from the University of Missouri helps clarify some of the confusion, which could lead to better interventions to promote positive behaviors in adolescents and clues as to what makes some individuals altruistic.

"As researchers, we've known about the link between sympathy and prosocial behavior, such as volunteering and helping others, for a long time, but we didn't have much evidence about the nature of the relationship," said Gustavo Carlo, Millsap Professor of Diversity in MU's College of Human Environmental Sciences. "We demonstrated that a reciprocal relationship existed between prosocial behaviors and sympathy for adolescents from ages 12 to 16. Sympathy predicted prosocial behaviors, but also engaging in earlier prosocial behaviors positively predicted later sympathy."
Engaging in prosocial behaviors has a self-reinforcing quality that eventually may become incorporated into how adolescents view their moral selves; this may help explain how some individuals, over time, become more likely to engage in prosocial behaviors and become more sympathetic, Carlo said.
"This research has tremendous implications for understanding those individuals who we think of as moral exemplars, individuals who commit themselves to certain causes or other forms of generosity -- people such as Mahatma Ghandi, Cesar Chavez, Martin Luther King Jr. and others," Carlo said. "We want to know which developmental processes led these individuals to eventually manifest altruistic behaviors that set them apart from other individuals. For every one of those individuals who became famous, thousands of others exist who are doing fantastic work and helping to improve our society on a day-to-day basis."
For the study, the researchers recruited 500 12-year-olds to answer questions about sympathy and prosocial behaviors. The researchers questioned the adolescents four more times, each about a year apart, to observe changes in the adolescents' behavior and sympathy over time. The researchers observed a decline in sympathy among boys in early adolescence, but a steady increase followed the dip as the boys matured. Girls had higher levels of sympathy and prosocial behaviors at all ages.
To increase prosocial behaviors among adolescents, and among boys in particular, attention should focus on changing the societal environment so it encourages boys and girls to express their prosociality, Carlo said.
"Unfortunately, in our society, the pressures for boys to act tough and to not express what's seen as a sign of weakness is suppressing prosocial behaviors," Carlo said. "We need to pay attention to adolescents' contexts and their socialization groups. Prosocial behaviors clearly are natural tendencies, and unfortunately, some cultural contexts make it difficult for adolescents to express those tendencies, which should be signs of strength and not weakness. We need to get that message across and make it easier for kids to express what's innately inside of them."

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Story Source:
The above post is reprinted from materials provided by University of Missouri-Columbia. Note: Materials may be edited for content and length

Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com. Also check out Patti's YouTube channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.