Extroverts
– Extroverts, especially extreme extroverts, love loud, fast-paced, overlapping
conversations filled with energy. Extroverts may think an introverted date is a
great listener, but it may be because they are not given a turn to talk as they
need silence to speak. So introverts can feel talked over and interrupted when
extroverts feel they are just having a great energetic conversation.
So extroverts
on dates can overwhelm introverts and may seem like a selfish, self-absorbed
show-up. So to make introverts feel comfortable, they need to ask them open-ended
questions; ask them to tell about a fun vacation or the best thing that has
happened in their life recently. Then let them go for it and be silent (TOUGH
FOR EXTROVERT.) According to research, Introverts like as much as 8 seconds of
silence after being asked a question before they have formed the perfect answer
and are ready to speak. Give introverts more eye contact even
when they are pausing. Extroverts sometimes drop eye contact when an Introvert
is talking softly or pausing. A listener should give more eye contact than the
speaker. Research suggests that if you want to have good rapport, you should
maintain eye-contact 60 to 70 percent of the time that someone speaks to you.
Females have been shown to be better at this than men and need more eye contact
from listeners to feel comfortable in the conversation
Patti Wood, MA - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com.
