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What is the worst thing that ever happened in your life that led to one of the best things that happened in your life?

My answer to a great conversation starting question.
A media source asked me what was the best personal and business thing I learned from the worst thing I experienced in my life. Here is the answer.

Worst thing. When I was 28 I was teaching body language at Florida State, had a business as a professional speaker and working full time on my Doctorate when my best friend, my twin soul, Roy Moyer told me he was dying from AIDS. We were both devastated.
Roy who had so much to give was dying very slowly and painfully and I wanted to move from my home in Tallahassee Florida to Atlanta to be with him.
I sold almost everything I owned down to the bare walls and moved to a little fourth floor walkup and spent a little less than a year with him before he died.

It was horrible and humbling but I learned so much about love and friendship. One of the best things I learned is to try to say and show my friends and family that I care for them.

I also learned things that served me well in my business specifically about first impressions that led to me writing a book. That learning included time I spent in hospitals with Roy.  I write and speak on body language, first impressions and patient care.   I also went from owning a business to working as a temp secretary that year and learned a lot about how offices work, specifically the front desk and how unsupportive women can be to other women at lower levels which has led to my speaking on first impressions as well as women and leadership.
The best business thing that happened is that I moved to Atlanta and my business took off.

Roy was an amazing person and we had always been there for each other but when you have so little time you learn that each conversation is gift.
The best thing I learned or more correctly must continue to learn is that I need to be present with those you love.



Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com. Also check out Patti's YouTube channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.

Kate Gosselin, Loving Mother or Monster?






















Patti analyzed the body language of Kate as her daughters, Mady and Cara, were being interviewed on the Today Show on Jan. 16th by Savannah Guthrie.  Cara, when asked a question by Savannah, looked to her controlling mother for answers in the upper picture.  Notice Kate's smile has tightness and is not an honest smile.  Also, in the lower picture, when her daughters would not say what Kate wanted them to say, she snapped and stated, "This is the most wordless I've heard them all morning."  Kate was forced to do the talking for the girls.

Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com. Also check out Patti's YouTube channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.

Lady Gaga and Taylor Kinney - What does their body language say about them as a couple?


What is fascinating is how her style, specifically her clothing and shoes, are hindering her connection to Taylor. The high heels and high split in the dress keeps her from walking closer and makes him have to slow down to her speed.  The low-cut dress makes her posture pull back and makes her choose to put her arm on her hip oddly to look bold and powerful. Her dress seems a metaphor of her relationship, Split in two. You see half of her is dressed conservatively the other half is bare and bold.  Half of her is in the relationship; the other half wants to be the Diva. 

He is also split in his emotions. See how half  his bulk and weight is held back to be with her. Very interesting!

They are split, but the handhold even with the pull of the bodies in two different directions is strong and interlocking.


 I give them a 3 on the Life & Style True Love Rating Scale.

Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com. Also check out Patti's YouTube channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.

Body Language Analysis of Woody Allen in Response to Sexual Abuse of Dylan Farrow


What does a guilty person look like and what does and innocent person look like?


Dylan Farrow, adopted daughter of Mia Farrow and Woody Allen, has accused Allen of sexual abuse when she was a child.  Last night on Dr. Drew I talked about Woody Allen’s body language in his first media response to the allegation in his interview with CBS “60 Minutes” in 1992. 

Allen is a well-documented recluse and granted this rare interview in his home the first time he was accused of sexually molesting Dylan Farrow. Here is the link to the key 11 minutes in the interview that I analyzed.


Over the years I have read his books, biographies of Allen, taken a Film class on his movies and then for the first time I read about the allegations in a recent Vanity Fair piece. Here are my rough notes in preparation for the interview.  Again let me repeat these are rough notes, not an article so the writing and thoughts are rough.

Remember Woody Allen is a brilliant actor, writer and comedian. And he uses his skills in the interview that he gave in his home.

First he avoids the seriousness of the accusation calling it a “NON Event.” He does not say he didn’t do anything, that it didn’t happen nor does he say that he didn’t harm his child. That is unusual.

As he is being asked if he took his daughter into the attic and touched herm he does not look horrified at what is said, in fact,  he poses and smiles.
When asked if there was any truth to the allegations, he does not say no... he does not shake his head no... he does not give any definitive emotional limbic brain response. 
Instead he gives six anxiety cues he retreats going back, closes his eyes, and then looks down, does a seat adjustment then another retreat signal, then he puts his hand over his mouth and coughs as he says, “Be logical about this.” Again he does not look the interviewer in the eye and say, “NO I didn’t do this.”
NO, he uses humor to counteract and his communication becomes smoother less halting and makes a few anxiety cues. He actually begins to enjoy the interview as he spends most of it making Mia seem like she is crazy for being upset about his affair with Soon-Yi. He goes into a rather scripted comedy routine as he bashes her.
Notice how he does falter and have trouble with words “daughter” and explaining what he did and didn’t do with Soon-Yi.

It is very interesting how he spends his time in this long interview. People who are guilty of something want to avoid responding to the accusations and change the subject. Innocent people want to spend any time saying and showing they are innocent. Innocent people want to repeat their innocence over and over again till they feel the interviewer believes them. They don’t want the subject changed till that is clear.

 If an innocent person has been wrongfully accused they may be mad at their accuser, but they don’t have to use humor to attack them. They may be mad at their accuser, but they do not do what Woody Allen did. They are not comfortable during the interview nor do they smile and use humor to attack their accuser. 

This is also significant - Notice he does not show concern for Dylan or any of the other children for whom he acted as a father.  Innocent people whose children have been harmed are concerned with the victim. If Woody Allen is innocent would he not be concerned that his adopted daughter is as he says, “been coached” by Mia to make these accusations?

Also notice how much pleasure he gets in saying how he hired another actress to replace Mia. If you read the Vanity Fair piece you realize Mia was paid minimally for all her parts in his movies and he at this time controlled her entire income and career. To go up against him and make these accusations would have been very frightening.

This was a media interview controlled by Allen, not an interrogation. I believe he is guilty of something, perhaps concerning Soon-Yi, but he is not asked enough interrogative questions concerning the molestation charges to have a firm conclusion on that event.


Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com. Also check out Patti's YouTube channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.

How to Get Media Interviews and Press for Your Business.

Tips from My Chapter of the NSA book PAID TO SPEAK

Since 2001, I have given an average of two national media interviews a week to promote my business, interviews with everyone from Forbes, The Wall Street Journal, The Today Show, Good Morning America, CNN, Fox News and hundreds more. 
Media sources are looking for experts they want -
·        Someone who can relate his or her topic to current events, hot companies and products that are in the headlines and high in people’s Google searches.  And someone who can relate their stories to Politicians, business leaders, Fortune 500 companies, famous people, who are currently in the media spotlight.  You also need to know on any given day what other experts in your field are saying about your subject expertise.
·        Someone who responds immediately. Have a smart phone and check it often. If you get a call and I have lost big opportunities because I didn't check my emails or texts for just a few hours.
·        They need you to be ready NOW! The media are extremely hard working people, their deadlines are tremendously tight and they are under enormous pressure to find a good source quickly. Print and online media typically needs an immediate answer and broadcast media typically gives you a few hours’ notice before your interview. 
Every day people you meet will tell you what your company represents to them, potential media pitch points you can put in press releases and how to prepare for your media interviews. You just need to listen.  If you speak to someone and they ask you a question, write it down, and research the correct answer and craft your response and have it ready for the media.  If you are at a networking event and someone makes a comment about your topic, product or company that is incorrect write down their statement later and ask yourself how you could state the information correctly or put their statement in the form of a question as if a media person asked it. For example, my cousin is an expert on coal mining and is the general counsel of the coal mining industry. He often has people share with him how horrible coal mining is for the environment. He keeps notes on all the statements as well as the questions he is asked and he makes sure he and anyone else that speaks and does media for his company has the latest research findings on coal mining’s effect on the environment, what the industry does to positively affect the environment as well as how the industry effects the costs of energy and builds jobs and is specific positive economic impact.  It is clear when he talks he is the expert. He knows what he is talking about and he speaks passionately about it.


Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com. Also check out Patti's YouTube channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.

Why You Should Brag

My friend Sue and I have known each other since grad school and have always supported each other’s successes. She is a wonderful, talented author and beloved English professor and I am a body language expert and professional speaker. Sue arranged for me to speak to the student body of her University.
 
The day of my speech we went over my intro and I showed her how to turn on my 40 sec intro video with snippets of newscasters and TV show hosts introducing me on their show.  We got to the room early and I put little bios and business cards on all the seats in the auditorium. As professors and students came in I introduced myself, “Hello my name is Patti I am your speaker today.”  I gave my speech and then spent another half hour with students gathered around me asking questions. 

All these were things that I did for every speech, but my friend said, “Patti, watching you do those things changed everything I thought about my career.”  At first I thought, “Goodness, Patti is going over the top with all this bragging about herself in the intros and then I noticed how people responded to you even before you started speaking. She said I have watched 100’s of speakers in that same Venue but they were treating you with honor and respect that I have never seen given before.  During your video intro, that I had thought originally was too much, I could see them get excited and lean forward in their seats. During your speech you gave brief, specific examples of how you used your body language expertise to solve a client’s problems and used it to analyze the president for the Today Show or CNN. Each example illustrated a learning point, and gave you an increased level of credibility with the audience.  But here is the funny thing, I have had the opportunity my entire career to promote myself the way you did and I have never done it because I thought I was bragging!

I told her she was a remarkable author and speaker and should own it and start self-promoting because men do so all the time!  I shared that for years I wanted to be a successful speaker but I never bragged and was too shy. I worked hard, but I’m not in the big leagues.   I looked around and realized that the male speakers would do it. I noticed when I spoke the men would actually stand around before and after meetings  and brag about the terrific job they did on a project, the great deal that they just made or the golf game or their new car. For men it is a way of showing their colleagues what they can do so that their peers feel confident in recommending them for projects, promotions and jobs.  It is an effective way to communicate.

Sue quickly started using the same self-promotion techniques. Doing this, and her hard work, led her to earn a tenured position and the raise she had long wanted and deserved. 



Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com. Also check out Patti's YouTube channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.

Body Language Read of Bradley and Suki



















As Bradley Cooper, 39, and girlfriend, Suki Waterhouse, 22, strolled around Park City, Utah, Patti says there seems to be a slight discord between the two.  Bradley is in better spirits than Suki is.  Bradley is proudly holding up his shoulders and giving a slight smile but Suki is showing signs of tension in her face but she is holding onto Bradley's hand which shows genuine affection.
Patti gives this couple a 3 on the Life & Style True Love Scale!

Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com. Also check out Patti's YouTube channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.

A Couple in Sync!


Patti said that the excited parents-to-be Emily Blunt, 30, and John Krasinski, 34, are clearly in sync.  They both have a relaxed smile and mutual gaze and their stride is long and easygoing as they walk.  John is also already acting paternal toward their unborn baby girl.  He is protectively walking a little bit ahead of Emily.
Patti gives this couple a 5 on the Life & Style True Love Scale.

Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com. Also check out Patti's YouTube channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.

Body Language of Emma Roberts and Evan Peters

Although Emma Roberts, 22, and Evan Peters, 26, are now engaged, the couple don't always look so lovey-dovey even when they are on a sweet ice cream date. Patti observes that Emma's lips and cheeks are filled with tension and she is also not leaning into his body.  Evan is not pulling her in, he's touching Emma in a very tentative way.

Patti gives this couple a 2 on the Life & Style True Love Rating scale!

Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com. Also check out Patti's YouTube channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.

Body Language of NFL Quarterbacks Cam Newton and Robert Griffin

The body language of NFL quarterbacks Cam Newton and Robert Griffin has changed significantly in their media appearances in the last year and The Washington Post asked me to analyze the specific differences and what they reflected.  I have notes and links to two of the videos I watched on my blog ( Rough notes and links to videos) and there is a link to Washington Post article below (my quotes are at the bottom. to analyze the shifts in the confidence level  of two star NFL football quarterbacks through their nonverbal communication during media appearances. 


Patti Wood studies body language, and she was asked this past week to analyze videos from Newton’s and Griffin’s news conferences, one each from 2012 and ’13. In studying Newton’s podium sessions last season, she sees a man unsure of himself, whose expressions show sadness and defeat, whose habit of looking downward and sagging shoulders convey distrust in himself and his abilities — hardly the preferred message from a leader of men.

“He mumbles out some of the words as if they tasted bad,” says Wood, author of “SNAP: Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language & Charisma.” She also noticed changes in Griffin from December 2012 to December 2013: Gone was the joyful, energetic Redskins rookie; in his place, she says, was a man whose posture and strained voice show defeat and frustration.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Iw0a60AL7I


Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com. Also check out Patti's YouTube channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.

Neutron Dance

Fred Astaire and Steve Martin dancing to the Neutron dance in the same video.  If you’re a fan on musicals and dance numbers you will enjoy this video of dance numbers edited together so all your favorite dancers and comedians who have danced in movies groove together. I grew up watching old movies of Ginger Rodgers glide across the floor in the arms of Fred Astaire and of course with Flash dance and Footloose. There is also Jim Carey and Jack Black and other fun favs cutting a rug. See if you can name all the movies in the video.




Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com. Also check out Patti's YouTube channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.

What Your Gum Chewing Habits Say About Your Personality

My work as the spokesperson for Wrigleys spearmint gum

If you are a bubble blower who chews gum to tide you over between meals and use gum to freshen your breath or when you are bored, and when you’re not blowing bubbles your chewing style is steady and methodical then you are a helper.

If you chew gum because you enjoy the taste and you chew with gusto, snapping and cracking, in the same animated and energetic way you live your life and use it to ease your tension and reduce your stress and chewing just makes you happy you are a persuader.

If you rarely chew gum, except perhaps to stave off hunger or when you are working and or concentrating on a project and you chew silently and discretely in a reserved and conservative manner then you are an analyzer.


If you chew your gum slowly with the same forceful and conquering “I can do it“ style that you live your life, and you chew gum to freshen your breath, reduce stress in your busy schedule and keep you going when you are on overwhelm then you are a doer.



Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impression, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com. Also check out Patti's YouTube channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.

Cam Newton’s body language changes from last year to this year.

Cam Newton’s and Robert Griffin’s body language changes from last year to this year.  I was asked by the Washington Post to analyze the shifts in the confidence level  of two star NFL football quarterbacks through their nonverbal communication during media appearances. Here are my rough notes.  I will post the Washington Post article when it appears.


Cam Newton’s body language changes from last year to this year.
Notice the start. He is looking down in a way, if you turn off the sound his behavior is that of shame. His head stays down, his eye focus is down and his mouth goes down in a pout. He twists his head and  in a jerky motion tilts his head down and smirks showing his displeasure with having to make some of the statements ( We smirk holding one side of the face up while the other goes down. (a smirk shows a disconnect between the neocortex  and  the limbic brain. You reveal your true feeling on the one side of your face before the neocortex can stop it) He smirks 5 times in this interview and  He continues this full gesture cluster for most of the interview. You would swear he is giving a classic post doping apology statement. Downward motions show sadness and defeat. Look at his sometimes his right and sometimes his left shoulder actually point downward. At times he looks like Christ on the cross as if he wants to say, “Why have you forsaken me.
Then turn on the sound and listen to his voice. I notice that his volume level actually down and his voice fades out at the end and his diction is unclear and he mumbles out some of the words as if they tasted bad. Also listen he sniffs and
A year later  We had a very great team win today.  A year later. Look at his posture and bearing as he begins. His head and chest are head up. His shoulders are  held up and back and balanced.  His left shoulder goes down slightly as he talks about a bad play, but then he pops up again as he moves on.  There remarkable shift is how he holds his head Straight up and level unless he is asked a tough question.  His voice cues (paralanguage) sounds like he is a totally different man.  He bursts out at the beginning of each sentence like a horse jumping out of the gate. The consonants are crisp and explosive as if he was trained in diction into handsome male Eliza Doolittle.  He moves in an animated manner, he gestures occasionally and points showing confidence and purposefulness.  As he finishes he does this fun little up up up little dance with his shoulders. Its very subtle, but its really interesting.  Its like a little child being questioned what can of time he is having half way through trip to Disney World. He wants to go have more fun. He even moves like the flash to get off the stage.
Robert Griffin’s body language changes from last year to this year.
Last year Robert Griffin’s body language changes from last year to this year.
Robert Griffin’s body language ,- Notice his side to side rocking and stepping motion. This shows his nervousness and excitement.  Rocking  is a comfort cue but his style of step rocking as if he is dancing makes it the Snoopy happy dance. (that is an obscure reference to the Peanuts character who danced up and side to side in just that manner) That behavior comes on stronger as he says positive things about the team. Its revealing that his head and shoulders come up briefly during the side to side stepping. This shows he is feels victorious. Up Body language shoulder up edges of the mouth up in smile head up are all behaviors of winning. (sometimes you see the hands go above the head in a winning touchdown to show supreme victory  and joy.)  then up rocking,   is showing his energy
Notice how he rubs up on his nose at 2:14 when the reporter mentions teams that are doing better the and follows with “the elite group”  then he gives a stare of death to the reporter. Here he has tried to downplay the win and the reporter is pushing his buttons.
Its interesting he keeps saying, “its not something to boast and brag about, then he does.” I label that  a contrary speak. By saying that repeatedly he is bragging!
Paralanguage (defines as nuances of the voice tone, speaking rate etc.) His voice is deep and  confident. He comes down hard at the end of each phrase with gusto and his volume level stays strong and the sound actually explodes out louder at the end of some sentences. Again these are nonverbal cues of confidence. The more he talks about his fellow players and phrases he can end in “US”  the stronger and faster his paralanguage becomes.
Interesting response to “Do you get the feeling that quarterbacks are defined by how they play in games like this at (7:19) He rocks but his head goes down and his mouth closes and his tongue goes behind his bottom lip in a defiant secret tongue thrust to show his confidence was hit and he would like to stick his tongue out at the reporter then he pushes out his bottom lip in defiance.
When asked about the Cowboys and his response, (8:48)NONE what so every, and his longer response we see him smile subtly and have some fun.  
This year.
Notices his mouth as he begins.  I call the mouth the window to the truth. He actually sticks his tongue out to the side, quite obviously. The side tongue out is interesting mixture of emotions,  It shows his frustration with HIMSELF and a desire to focus and do better. I typically see it in small children who are doing hard match problems or who are drawing after they have been told they don’t draw well.
Then  he does several shirt in pants and pulling up pants comfort cue adjustments, indicating he wants to look good,  (not have pants fall down and be bear bummed and humiliated  in the press. He even does the pants pull up with BOTH hands in response to that first tough question that he might not start.
Listen to his paralanguage. His voice is horse and strains to come out.  It sounds like this is defeated as if Like he has shouted to god why and this is all the voice he has left after the shouting.

His shoulders in the yellow jersey are pointing down.  His posture looks down and defeated even in that bulky shirt with his big bad shoulders going down and he looks down. He hides his hands behind his back. We hide are our hands to hide the truth of our emotions.  He does show shades of his power as his elbows go up and he wants to hold his hands on his hips and he swings back and forth, but its not confident. His shoulders curve in so his heart points down, his shoulders are not back,  and his head dips down. 


Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com. Also check out Patti's YouTube channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.