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Refusing to shake hands in sports

What does refusing a handshake mean?
I got a call yesterday from the UK publication The Independent on Sunday. The reporter shared that one famous soccer player had refused to shake hands with another. The soccer players involved are John Terry and Wayne Bridge.

LONDON, Feb 27 (Reuters) - Wayne Bridge refused to shake the hand of former team mate John Terry during the pre-match greeting between opposing teams before Manchester City’s Premier League match kicked off at Chelsea on Saturday.

Bridge, who has made himself unavailable to be selected for England rather than be in the same squad as Terry, ignored the Chelsea defender as the Manchester City players walked down the line of home players.

The two men have been the centre of newspapers headlines for weeks following allegations that Terry, his former close friend, had an extra-marital affair with Bridge’s former girlfriend.

After shaking hands with the officials, Bridge then came to Terry, glanced and ignored him then continued to shake hands with the rest of the Chelsea side, many of whom are his former team mates.

I discussed with the reporter what that refusal meant.
Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional
The Body Language Expert
Web- http://www.PattiWood.net
I have a new quiz on my YouTubestation. Check it out!
YouTube- YouTube - bodylanguageexpert's Channel

First Impression, What you do makes a differance.

What does your first impression say about you?
Clients come to me to improve their first impression and create more effective first encounters. Sometimes people are uncomfortable and they develop little nonverbal behaviors that effect their first impression and once they become aware of those habits and there effect magic happens.
A year ago I was working with a coaching client on her first impression. My client is happily married and in her 50's she wants to feel more comfortable interacting with strangers. She had noticed that when she was out with a particular girlfriend that strangers approached her girlfriend before her and would stand facing toward her friend and engage with her friend before her. She wanted full unedited feedback from me about her first impression. The first thing I shared with her was how her very silhouette could be off putting. She is very attractive but because she has very broad shoulders and a broad upper chest while the rest of her torso comes in it creates a v silhouette. You have heard me speak about how silhouette's are read by on of the brains in the eye. That silhouette looks like a big man. Just viewing that silhouette can activate the danger response and make people less likely to approach and more likely to be on guard if they do interact.
Then we looked at her head. As she stands and sits her head juts forward slightly.A head just can show intent listening or vocal emphasis depending on the timing but if you jut it forward as you approach and hold it there with out other body language cues or facial cues to soften it it can make you look aggressive. My client soften it somewhat by tilting her head to the side a beautiful softening cue, but then added to the mix a mouth cues. She pressed her lips together in a modified pucker. Though her eyes were beautiful she stared without blinking the combination I shared could make her look a bit assertive and judgmental.

Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional
The Body Language Expert
Web- http://www.PattiWood.net
I have a new quiz on my YouTubestation. Check it out!
YouTube- YouTube - bodylanguageexpert's Channel

Link between Human Capital and Investement and Corporate Deal Success, How Training Leaders Effects Your Bottom Line

Invest in training your people. Study by Hewitt Finds Link between Human Capital Investment and Corporate Deal Success.Training your people makes a difference.

The following article was written by Rebecca Moore
Here is the link http://www.plansponsor.com/Hewitt_Finds_Link_between_Human_Capital_Investment_and_Corporate_Deal_Success.aspx

Retirement Resource
February 22, 2010 (PLANSPONSOR.com) – A new global survey by Hewitt Associates indicates that effectively addressing human capital issues can be a critical tipping point in the success of an organization’s deal.


According to a news release, Hewitt compared the survey responses of companies that exceeded deal objectives (Overachievers) versus those organizations that did not achieve their deal objectives (Underachievers), and found a clear link between deal success and investment in leadership and key talent issues. Overachievers and Underachievers both say leadership and talent strategies are important to the success of a deal (69% versus 62%, respectively), but less than a third (32%) of Underachievers report their leadership and key talent strategy in transactions as being effective, compared with 70% of Overachievers.

In addition, the news release said, Overachievers are twice as likely to effectively identify and retain leaders (81% versus 42%) and assess critical talent (73% versus 35%).

A separate Hewitt analysis shows that the loss of critical employees can have a devastating impact on corporate transactions. Based on a sample of 96 companies representing more than $568 billion in total deal value over a two-year period, the analysis found that more than $54 billion - or 10% - of a deal’s value depends on the rate at which critical employees separate during or immediately after corporate transactions.

Hewitt’s quarterly M&A pulse survey of 278 organizations around the world shows that 72% expect to increase their deal activity over the next two years.

Nearly half (47%) said their past transactions did not achieve their intended financial and strategic objectives. While almost two-thirds (65%) of companies indicate that leadership and key talent retention are critical to the success of a deal, 49% of these organizations report they have lost critical employees at the same rate or at an even higher rate than non-critical employees.

"Human capital is one of the top three intangible assets of any organization, yet many companies fail to execute a rigorous and sustained leadership and key talent approach, permitting key leaders and talent to walk out the door," said Elizabeth Fealy, global leader of Hewitt’s Corporate Transaction and Transformation practice, in the news release. "As companies prepare for 2010 and beyond, there is a real opportunity to shift the dial. Having a formal strategy and game plan for leadership and key talent and effectively executing on it is critical for achieving better deal success."


Rebecca Moore
editors@plansponsor.com
Retirement Resource Center


Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional
The Body Language Expert
Web- http://www.PattiWood.net
I have a new quiz on my YouTubestation. Check it out!
YouTube- YouTube - bodylanguageexpert's Channel

How Vera Wang Got Her Start

I just finished reading a fascinating article in Departures magazine on Bridal Dress Designer Vera Wang. She and now a fashioning low cost designs for Khols.
I was stunned to learn the influence of her demanding father on Vera's career. After she studied drams and art history at Sarah Lawrence College and spent her Junior year at he Sorbonne in Paris she wished to attend design school, but her father refused to pay for it, saying "If you are such a hot shot, get a job," She got one at Vogue and then went on to Ralph Lauren she spent two decades in the magazine business and went back to her dad who said, "You may know magazines but you don't know the fashion business." He backed her on the condition she open a bridal business." She did, even though her favorite "color" is black. Her new line has a long black wedding dress.

Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional
The Body Language Expert
Web- http://www.PattiWood.net
I have a new quiz on my YouTubestation. Check it out!
YouTube- YouTube - bodylanguageexpert's Channel

Shopafrolic.com for Dress, Make up, Shopping and Alwasy Looking Young

I found a fun website for girly girls who like to shop. I would this site to women who want to always look young. It is called Shopafrolic.com
They have great makeup recommendations and clothing and jewelry recommendations. I have a post with all my makeup recommendations so you can search here for my tips too. This is a first for this post, but I have been emailing friends these recommendations and decided every women needs to know about these little treasures.

Knee Length Legging, $66
iambeyond.com
Liz: Just like I don't wear tights I also don't wear ankle-length workout pants. Jane turned me on to this pant and I am a convert. I am all about fit and fabric - These are made from Supplex and Tactel which have amazing stretch, retains shape and color even with continuous washings.
Jane: My friend Jodi, who started Beyond Yoga, sent me these and when I say I haven't taken them off since I got them I mean literally! It's over used but the material is like butter. It holds you in and hides little puckers but doesn't feel like Spanx. Do as I do and wear them to the gym, then pull on your over-the-knee boots and go to the office. No one is the wiser.

Nixon Vega Watch - Women's, $59.95
www.backcountry.com
Liz: Confession: I am a watch snob. But I do love a watch that is not trying to be something it is not. This watch has such a great retro feel. It also doubles as a big bracelet. Guilt free shopping: Nixon donates proceeds to Breast Cancer.
Jane: This watch reminds me of the Gucci Bubble Watch our mother had back in the 1970's where she could switch out the faces in different colors. I kind of want one of these in every color to match my outfit everyday. It is also great for working out but unfortunately not waterproof. Fashion before function!

Physicians Formula Concealer Twins Correct & Cover Cream Concealer, $6.95
www.drugstore.com
Liz: Confession: We all have our issues but skin just isn't mine. That said, I like the light color for under/inner eye brightening. And I always love a two in one item. I use the darker when I am tan and/or I mix them. Go Jane...
Jane: Yes, my sister was blessed with perfect skin while I suffer with fair, thin, aging skin. Robin Cosio, most amazing makeup artist and eyebrow fixer, introduced me to this product. The green is magic for covering red blemishes (confession: I am a picker). The light color is great for lightly evening out anything else. Unlike most concealers, this formula is not crepe-y and leaves no residue. Last selling point - hypoallergenic and fragrance free. Last last selling point - $6.95!!!!

They even have a cupon for Intamacy on the site.

email

Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional
The Body Language Expert
Web- http://www.PattiWood.net
I have a new quiz on my YouTubestation. Check it out!
YouTube- YouTube - bodylanguageexpert's Channel

The link to the Mark Schack Murder trial with body language and lying analysis.

Murder trial with body language and lying analysis.The interview is on http://insession.blogs.cnn.com/



Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional
The Body Language Expert
Web- http://www.PattiWood.net
I have a new quiz on my YouTubestation. Check it out!
YouTube- YouTube - bodylanguageexpert's Channel

Deciphering Mark Shack's Body Language

I ananalyed the body language or Murder Suspect Mark Schack on TruTV(formerly Court Television. Last Friday the link to my TV interivew on CNN/Tru Tv is below. If you ahve trouble using the link go to CNN.com and type in my name.

http://www.cnn.com/video/#/video/crime/2010/02/19/wood.body.language.insession?iref=allsearch




using www.bit.yl
Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional
The Body Language Expert
Web- http://www.PattiWood.net
I have a new quiz on my YouTubestation. Check it out!
YouTube- YouTube - bodylanguageexpert's Channel

Bachelor-Reunion-Rozlyn-Pappas

The article on AOL

http://www.popeater.com/2010/02/23/bachelor-reunion-rozlyn-pappas/?ncid=webmaildl2

Actions speak louder than words, Rozlyn! Disgraced 'Bachelor' contestant Rozlyn Papa, who was booted from the show mid-season for having an inappropriate relationship with a producer, still has something to hide, according to our body language experts. When host Chris Harrison confronted her on the 'Bachelor: Women Tell All' special on Monday night, Roz was not being entirely truthful.

Our experts say declaratory statements often indicate deception, so Rozlyn probably wasn't telling the whole truth when she declared, "On my child's life, that never happened!"

The tone of her voice was also a giveaway that the blonde beauty wasn't being entirely honest.

"When denying the accusations, the pitch of her voice was considerably higher, this is indicative of stress," explains body language expert Vincent Harris. "When we are being deceptive or lying, we become more stressed."

Her stance also indicated fear. "She moved her hands to interlock around her crossed legs at the front of her shin in a log cabin guard. This low log cabin shows she is very fearful. She is still protecting herself. Even though her back is up and she is nodding her head, her lower body is showing she is scared of what Chris will say next," explains body language expert Patti Wood.

The other bachelorettes expressed their mortification at Rozlyn's actions through self-satisfied smirks while they watched her squirm in the hot seat. The camera continually panned to Ashley, who wasn't delighting as much as everyone else. Ashley was pissed!

"We see Ashley lips tightly pressed downward and her angry eyes. Ashley is dying to yell something," Wood explains.

As Harrison repeatedly asked Rozlyn whether anything inappropriate occurred in the house, her brow furrowed, another sign of anxiety and stress.

When Ella started to get judgey about Rozlyn's actions, if you watch closely you can see Rozlyn's top lip start to curl.

"This is a sign of her underlying anger; anger that she is working to suppress, but that is leaking out anyway. These small 'leaks' are all but impossible to conceal, hide or prevent, and give us a sneak peek at what emotion she is really feeling," Harris says.

But she isn't just lying about her relationship with the producer. Rozlyn seems to be lying about everything. At one point, she tells the other ladies that she never said anything bad about them after she left the show. Probably not true.

"She shoulder shrugs when she says she never said anything but nice things about the other women," says Janine Driver, author of 'YOU SAY MORE THAN YOU THINK: A 7-Day Plan For Using the New Body Language to Get What You Want!' "Which means it's deception. A shoulder shrug cancels out the verbal message so we know she has talked negatively about these women in the past."

And what's Chris Harrison trying to hide? When Roz bit back at Chris, claiming he hit on her producer friend's wife in New Zealand, Chris got a little cagey.

"Chris broke eye contact, looked down and appeared to struggle with making direct eye contact with Rozlyn again. Chris can clearly be seen swallowing -- a clear sign of anxiety and nervousness when read in context. My hunch is that there is probably more to the New Zealand story than Harrison would like to discuss," Harris explains.

Oh what a tangled web we weave when we appear on reality television.


Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional
The Body Language Expert
Web- http://www.PattiWood.net
I have a new quiz on my YouTubestation. Check it out!
YouTube- YouTube - bodylanguageexpert's Channel

The Bachlor, Rozlyn's Body Language in Interview

The Bachelor, Rozlyn's body language. Here are my rough notes for a story I did today. As she comes down the hallway in the back of the studio, she her shoulders are back her head is forward there is a nervous yet expectant smile on her face. Her lavender dress is flowing soft in ruffled tiers away from her body. She has chosen to dress in a very feminine dress not something tight and bold but at the same time short and exposing one shoulder completely and the other partially. She knows she looks good. When she comes into the studio, she faces the hate wall of the bachelorettes most with pressed down lips frowns and other more fierce facial expressions. If you screen grab on the way she sits down you will note how unusual it is. Under neath her crossed legs she clasps her hands under her thigh. It looks like she is hiding the view of her underwear. Symbolically she is hiding her “femininity. “From attack. As the host says, he bears him, no ill will she bounces in a mock bow/strike to him with her upper body. Still protecting her lower body saying, “I thought we would get into a cage match.”
As she comes back, she moves her hands to interlock around her crossed legs at the front of her shin. In a log cabin guard. This low log cabin shows she is very fearful. She is still protecting her sel. Even though her her back is up and she is nodding her head her lower body is showing she e is scared of what he will say next.
When she discusses meeting the producer her gestures, voice, and words are in sync, and flow musically together she is telling the truth. As she gestures toward Ashley Omar, we see Ashlee’s tightly pressed downward turned lips and angry eyes. Ashley is dying to yell something.

As the host says “so you didn’t have a physical relationship Rozlyn presses her lips together. Her hands have gone back to log cabin position. She is trying hard not to show how she feels or interrupt him as he speaks.
Her voice gets raised tense and angry as she defends herself saying she thought it was about the phone, “You wouldn’t let me talk to my son, …saying we don’t have a camera crew available to capture it.” She is miffed about this.

The host again comes back to “Did anything physical happen in the house. She says the same thing no absolutely not….he asks again and she says’ ….Nothing.” again begins to lick and bite her lips with anxiety. She draws her crossed legs in closer to her body.

As the other women begin to speak one discusses her little rear end in the air incident where one of the women says Rozlyn” want to be put to bed by the producer”

As they start taking touching thigh, putting to be, sleeping.


Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional
The Body Language Expert
Web- http://www.PattiWood.net
I have a new quiz on my YouTubestation. Check it out!
YouTube- YouTube - bodylanguageexpert's Channel

Parent Magazine, Baby body language

I just did an interview with Parent Magazine about baby body language. We talked about what a small child's arm cross means and what parents can do when their child is presented with something new, such as a rocking horse and crossed their arms. We talked about how there are over sixty seven different motivations for someone crossing their arms. I suggested that the parent know the baseline of their child's normal behavior and then if they find their child crossing their arms, if they don't usually cross their arms they know it is that event that is causing the arm cross. Since the rocking horse could be new a scary. I suggested that the parent could tell the child how the horse moves and how it sounds at it moves then the parent can use there hands to make the rocking horse move.


Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional
The Body Language Expert
Web- http://www.PattiWood.net
I have a new quiz on my YouTubestation. Check it out!
YouTube- YouTube - bodylanguageexpert's Channel

Tiger Woods' mom Kultida was furious, heartbroken during his apology, say body language experts

Tiger Woods' mom Kultida was furious, heartbroken during his apology, say body language expert. Article in New York Daily News
barely controlled her rage as she watched her son apologize Friday for his cheating ways, body language experts said.

A famously guarded woman who reportedly dealt with infidelity in her own marriage, Kultida crossed her arms and glowered at the floor as she listened to Tiger admit his "foolish" philandering.

"She was extraordinarily tense. I'd say it was anger," said Patti Wood, an Atlanta-based body language specialist. "Her mouth was downward and pursed very tight, like she was holding back very negative emotions."

At the end of Tiger's remarks, Kultida eventually cracked a smile and hugged and kissed her son before defending him to reporters.

"You know what? I'm so proud to be his mother," she said at the heavily scripted event in Florida.

"People don't understand that Tiger has a very good heart and soul."

Still, she couldn't hide her personal pain as the camera rolled.


Kultida said her son would learn from his mistakes and that his return to Buddhism would "make him a much better person."

ndillon@nydailynews.com



Read more: http://www.nydailynews.com/gossip/2010/02/20/2010-02-20_mom_was_boilin_mad_tried_to_hold_it_inside_say_pros.html#ixzz0gUegBiOS

Read more: http://www.nydailynews.com/gossip/2010/02/20/2010-02-20_mom_was_boilin_mad_tried_to_hold_it_inside_say_pros.html#ixzz0gUePt4NA
New York Daily News
http://www.nydailynews.com/gossip/2010/02/20/2010-02-20_mom_was_boilin_mad_tried_to_hold_it_inside_say_pros.html




Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional
The Body Language Expert
Web- http://www.PattiWood.net
I have a new quiz on my YouTubestation. Check it out!
YouTube- YouTube - bodylanguageexpert's Channel

Celebrity feet, What the language of the feet say.

The secret language of the feet. Today I will be reading the body language of celebrity photos for First for Women magazine focussing on the feet and what they "say" This will be out in next's months issue.

FIRST for Women Magazine



Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional
The Body Language Expert
Web- http://www.PattiWood.net
I have a new quiz on my YouTubestation. Check it out!
YouTube- YouTube - bodylanguageexpert's Channel

Body Language, Rozlyn on The Bachelor,

My Body language analysis of Rozlyn, Chrid Harrison and the bachlorett's on The Bachelor will be on AOL tonight at 8:00. Specifically I talk about Rozlyn's body language as she responds to questions about her alleged affair. I also discuss Chris Harrison and the Bachelorett's body language. Here is the clip. My rough notes are in the previous blog.

http://www.popeater.com/2010/02/23/rozlyn-papa-returns-to-bachelor-to-deny-affair-and-slam-host/




Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional
The Body Language Expert
Web- http://www.PattiWood.net
I have a new quiz on my YouTubestation. Check it out!
YouTube- YouTube - bodylanguageexpert's Channel

Rozlyn Papa's body language, Bachelor

My rough noes on Rozyn Papa from the Bachelor's body language as she is interviewed about her friendship with the now fired producer. The link to the video is below.
As she comes down the hallway in the back of the studio, she her shoulders are back her head is forward there is a nervous yet expectant smile on her face. Her lavender dress is flowing soft in ruffled tiers away from her body. She has chosen to dress in a very feminine dress not something tight and bold but at the same time short and exposing one shoulder completely and the other partially. She knows she looks good. When she comes into the studio, she faces the hate wall of the bachelorettes most with pressed down lips frowns and other more fierce facial expressions. If you screen grab on the way she sits down you will note how unusual it is. Under Neath her crossed legs she clasps her hands under her thigh. It looks like she is hiding the view of her underwear. Symbolically she is hiding her “femininity. “From attack. As the host says, he bears him, no ill will she bounces in a mock bow/strike to him with her upper body. Still protecting her lower body saying, “I thought we would get into a cage match.”
As she comes back, she moves her hands to interlock around her crossed legs at the front of her shin. in a log cabin guard. This low log cabin shows she is very fearful. She is still protecting her self. Even though her her back is up and she is nodding her head her lower body is showing she e is scared of what he will say next.
When she discusses meeting the producer her gestures and voice and words are in sync, and flow musically together she is telling the truth. As she gestures toward Ashley Omar we see Ashlee's tightly pressed downward turned lips and Angry eyes. Ashely is dying to yell something.

As the host says “so you didn’t have a physical relationship Rozlyn presses her lips together. Her hands have gone back to log cabin position. She is trying hard to not show how she feels or interrupt him as he speaks.
Her voice gets raised tense and angry as she defends herself saying she thought it was about the phone, “You wouldn’t let me talk to my son, …saying we don’t have a camera crew available to capture it.” She is really miffed about this.

The host again comes back to “Did anything physical happen in the house. She says the same thing no absolutely not….he asks again and she says’ ….Nothing.” again begins to lick and bite her lips with anxiety. She draws her crossed legs in closer to her body.


As the other women begin to speak one discusses her little rear end in the air incident where one of the women says Rozlyn” want to be put to bed by the producer”
The way she kept saying, “We are friends” was odd her voices tenses her chin comes up her eyes shut in an eye block her body occasionally tightens up all in a defensive manner. If she is comfortable with the friendship it should have been easy and lyrical as it came out of her mouth. Not desperate and angry.


As they start taking touching thigh, putting to be, sleeping. She sits up straighter. She attacks them she does not say to the other women I didn’t do that, she says why would I do that. She says she thinks they are beautiful. She tried again and again to take the discussion to some other topic, the cameras, the girls. These are all tactics of someone who is guilty. She would have looked incocent if she had come out and said. I am have been accused of this I didn’t do it. I was accused of this I didn’t do it. I was accused of this I didn’t do it.
The host asks her if she is and she says no. Her voice gets strident as she




http://www.popeater.com/2010/02/23/rozlyn-papa-returns-to-bachelor-to-deny-affair-and-slam-host/
Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional
The Body Language Expert
Web- http://www.PattiWood.net
I have a new quiz on my YouTubestation. Check it out!
YouTube- YouTube - bodylanguageexpert's Channel

Interrogation, analysis Patti on TruTV formally Court TV

Subject line - Patti Wood on TruTV Friday.

Patti Wood will be on TruTV formally Court TV Friday February 19th between 1:30 and 2:00.

Patti will be analyzing the body language or Mark Schack as he listens to his original interrogation recording’during court
room testimony. This week Mark Schack was convicted of murdering his girlfriend in Florida.
You may know that Patti taught Interviews and Interrogation Techniques to all branches of Law Enforcement and conducts
workshops and speeches on Credibility and Deception Detection.

Patti will also be analyzing Tiger Wood’s televised apology on Friday for several news outlets and will be posting
Her notes on her blog http://www.bodylanguagelady.blogspot.com/





Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional
The Body Language Expert
Web- http://www.PattiWood.net
I have a new quiz on my YouTubestation. Check it out!
YouTube- YouTube - bodylanguageexpert's Channel

Your dog your pal. Dog and Pet Owner body language

Have you ever communicated with your dog without saying a word? Has your dog every noticed your mood or comforted you? Do you like to hang and just chill with your dog? I would love to see a photo of you sharring a look, hanging out on the couch, walking with your dog or of your dog greeting you happily when you come home. Send it to me in a jpeg at Patti@PattiWood.net


Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional
The Body Language Expert
Web- http://www.PattiWood.net
I have a new quiz on my YouTubestation. Check it out!
YouTube- YouTube - bodylanguageexpert's Channel

Ways to say, "I love you." through greetings and goodbyes.

Quoted in the Toronto sun today.
http://www.torontosun.com/life/2010/02/09/12807046.html

Love signals

Say hello to love.

Celebrity body language expert Patti Wood says warm, caring greetings are extremely important love signals for keeping the love alive.

“Always make a loving ritual of hellos and goodbyes,” stresses Wood.

No matter where you are in the house, drop whatever you’re doing, and greet your spouse with a kiss and or a hug hello when they come home. “Go to them immediately, even if you are on the phone, cooking or online.” This communicates that he or she is the most important thing to you.

“You are saying nonverbally, ‘You come first,’” says Wood, adding that no warm welcome actually increases the chance of arguing later on.

Goodbye hugs and kisses have a big impact too. These gestures say “I leave you with love,” says Wood. “With a touch goodbye, you anchor to your mate.”

 She also recommends creating a “secret” – a non-verbal love signal shared just between the two of you. “The look can mean, ‘I love you,’ ‘I want you right now’ or ‘You look great to me’,” suggests Wood, a savvy motivational speaker.

Your secret love signal could be as simple as a sly smile, or your lips puckered up, or maybe a quick wrinkling up of the nose. It could be as simple as a tilt to the head to indicate you’d like to rest your head on his shoulder as a gesture of warmth and respect, says Wood, of pattiwood.net.

Words are not needed, she adds. “The secret love signal can recreate the love each time it is given.”

She also suggests focusing on care-taking signals to strengthen relationships, like bringing someone a glass of water or making them a cup of tea. Picking up their dry cleaning for them or even packing them a healthy snack for work.

Wood adds that standing close to one another, making eye contact and showing sincere interest by leaning in when you’re speaking to one another also contribute to a great connection.

It’s touch or go - and never too late to re-ignite that loving feeling


Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional
The Body Language Expert
Web- http://www.PattiWood.net
I have a new quiz on my YouTubestation. Check it out!
YouTube- YouTube - bodylanguageexpert's Channel

Can Dogs Understand Us When We are Mad?

Sparky, get off the couch!”
Sparky freezes his body on the couch.
I can’t believe you are on the couch." "Sparky bad boy.”
Sparky looks down and away but still doesn't get off the sofa.
“We have company be good and get down.” You say motioning
from the couch to the floor.
Sparky gets off the couch his head and haunches down.
"Good boy for getting off the couch." you say sweetly and kindly.
Sparky approaches you wagging his tale in submission and friendliness.

Your dog is not responding to your words nor does he feel guilty or know that he has done wrong. Though dogs can understand some words. Typicaly he is responding to your nonverbal communication. Your voice and your behaviors. Dogs may look guilty, but they are typically responding to their powerful humans. Dogs have the human mind equivalent of a 2 to 2 and ½ year old. They don’t feel guilt. Guilt doesn’t typically develop in humans until age four. If you ever raised a teenager or dated a jerk or jerkess you now a sense of right and wrong may not develop even in an adult. What dogs do understand is your tone of voice, your facial expressions, your gestures and posture. Dogs have been bred for generations to be astute readers of human body language. They have learned to associate mad Pet Mommy or Pet Daddy with certain behaviors and respond accordingly.

Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional
The Body Language Expert
Web- http://www.PattiWood.net
I have a new quiz on my YouTubestation. Check it out!
YouTube- YouTube - bodylanguageexpert's Channel

Body Language Methods to Avoid a Bore or Stop Talking and End a Conversation.

Avoiding a bore. Tips to stopping or ending a conversation.

Yesterday morning I did a BBC radio program on how to avoid a boring co-worker. One of the producers on the show had called the Host of the show and pretended he was having a conversation with him in order to avoid talking to a borring co-worker that was walking towards his desk. That is one technique here are other tips for avoiding or ending a conversation. Excerpts from my book.

There are things you do subconsciously to shut down conversation that you can do consciously to close down a conversation with someone.

You can close the window of your eyes, by closing both your eyes for just a brief moment longer than you do for an ordinary blink.

You can do a head bow and bring your down the head avoiding or breaking eye contact as the person approaches or less dramatically and more quickly if you are already in conversation.

You can turn shut your mouth tightly so help avoid giving facial feedback to the boring co-worker as feedback increases the likelihood they will continue talking.

You can turn your heart away and you can turn your toes away.


Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional
The Body Language Expert
Web- http://www.PattiWood.net
I have a new quiz on my YouTubestation. Check it out!
YouTube- YouTube - bodylanguageexpert's Channel

Work Out, Gym Body Language, First Impressions

Quoted in Working Women.

WEIGHT LIFTING FOR WOMEN
A Quick Strength Training Guide For Women
Tackle daunting machines and dumbbells with this guide--and burn more fat
Jen Ator; Additional reporting by Alex Kish

Lifting weights has some seriously cool benefits: It increases lean muscle mass, which boosts metabolism and helps torch calories and shed stubborn fat. It also improves the quality of your sleep, wards off back pain, and protects you from disease.

Despite all this, many women dodge the dumbbells at the gym—in fact, only 21 percent strength-train two or three times a week. It may be that the rest are misguided, feel intimidated, or are just plain avoiding it!

Well, the excuses end here. We enlisted top trainers to create this easy-to-follow weight-room cheat sheet. The payoff of pumping more iron will be a leaner, sexier you.

1. Have a Plan
When you enter an unfamiliar situation (say, the free-weight zone), your body will naturally freeze for a moment and only your eyes will move, says body-language expert Patti Wood, author of Success Signals: Body Language in Business. It's an obvious physical sign that you're confused. Decide beforehand what you'll do as soon as you go into the room. For example, make a beeline for the dumbbells. But which ones? Lifting too much too soon can hurt your form and put you at risk for injury, but grabbing two-pounders won't get you results. New York City personal trainer Dan Ownes gives a head-to-toe exercise barometer of just-right weights for beginners:

If you're doing...lateral raises
Start with...2.5 to 5 pounds in each hand

If you're doing...biceps curls
Start with...5 to 8 pounds in each hand

If you're doing...flat-bench dumbbell rows
Start with...12 to 20 pounds

If you're doing...chest presses
Start with...12 pounds (body bar) to 45 pounds

If you're doing...squats
Start with...zero (body weight) to 45 pounds


2. Stay Steady
The occasional slam of a weight stack is par for the course when you're using resistance equipment like the cable machine or seated leg press, but causing a storm of noise is a classic newbie doh! And it's more than just bad manners. "Lowering the weight without control can result in injury," says Brad Schoenfeld, owner of the Personal Training Center for Women in Scarsdale, New York, and author of Women's Home Workout Bible. "It can also prevent you from getting the tone you're after, because you don't work through the full range of motion." Lower the weights slowly enough that you can perform every rep of the exercise with good form (and less clanking!).


3. Breathe Easy
Even seasoned lifters sometimes forget to breathe during a tough move. But it's counterproductive. "You starve the body of oxygen, which forces your heart to work a lot harder," says certified strength and conditioning specialist Josh Kernen, owner of Bridgetown Physical Therapy & Training Studio in Portland, Oregon. Exhale during the major exertion in each move, and inhale while returning to the starting position.


4. Break a Sweat
Go full-steam, or you might as well go home. A good way to gauge your effort: Monitor how hard you feel like your body is working. It's called your rating of perceived exertion (RPE), and it's usually measured on a scale of one to 10, with one being very little exertion (like lounging in bed) and 10 being the max (running away from an angry dog). To build and tone muscle, aim for an RPE of at least seven or eight during workouts, says Kernen. "Even if you're happy with your tone, you still have to hit six or seven to maintain muscle mass."


5. Think Total Body
Your muffin top may be the only thing that's motivating you to hit the gym, but it's a mistake to attack just your least-favorite assets. "Spot-reducing exercises simply don't work," says Schoenfeld. Full-body workouts torch fat more efficiently because they build more lean muscle mass, which in turn burns more calories per day. And think about it: Wouldn't you rather eradicate all your jiggle?





Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional
The Body Language Expert
Web- http://www.PattiWood.net
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Body Language at Work, First Impressions

Reading body language in your co-workers so you can tell what they really think about you.


What Your Colleagues Really Think of You
Wondering about your workplace relationships? How to tell what your colleagues really think of you
Jennifer Barrett; Additional reporting by Alex Kish

You don't have to wait for someone to get tipsy at the holiday party to find out how you're viewed at work. "We get nonverbal messages from the people around us every day—often, we're just not paying enough attention," says Sherron Bienvenu, Ph. D., a communications professor emerita at Emory University's Goizueta Business School and author of Business Communications. Following is a crash course in ferreting out whether your workplace colleagues think you're smart, likable, or neither!

Your Coworkers Like You If...

They initiate conversations
Coffee klatches have gone the way of cigarette breaks—they're all but extinct. Nowadays most people communicate by e-mail, IM, or phone. "So if your colleagues are chatting you up in the hallway, they're taking time to break routine to speak to you," says Patti Wood, an Atlanta-based body language expert. If they avert their eyes or sneak glances at their watches during a conversation, they may not be so into you.

They offer feedback
During a one-on-one, does your coworker nod thoughtfully and lean into your conversation? Do the corners of her eyes crinkle when she smiles in response to funny comments you make? "The more animated a person's face, the more emotionally invested they are in the conversation," says Tonya Reiman, a New York City-based body language expert and the author of The Power of Body Language.

They're smooth talkers
"People deviate from their normal speech patterns when they're nervous or uncomfortable," says Maryann Karinch, a body language expert based outside Denver and a coauthor of How to Spot a Liar. Someone who normally speaks at a leisurely pace might become a speed talker, while a person who usually talks quickly might pause for long moments. If they enjoy your company, you won't notice a change in their vocal stride.

WORK RELATIONSHIPS: DECODE YOUR COWORKERS
What Your Colleagues Really Think of You
Wondering about your workplace relationships? How to tell what your colleagues really think of you
Jennifer Barrett; Additional reporting by Alex Kish

Your Coworkers Respect You If...

They keep quiet
Asking for your opinion—that's a no-brainer. But letting you take control of a conversation is a less obvious way to show how much they care about what you have to say. "You can see the degree to which other people respect you by observing how often they look to you for a reaction or a cue," says psychologist Ann Demarais, Ph. D., a coauthor of First Impressions: What You Don't Know About How Others See You. "And when a problem arises, they turn to face you."

They make room for you
"When you sit down at a meeting, see if your neighbors move their stuff closer to themselves and out of your way, or push their chair back a bit to give you more room," Demarais says. "That shows respect."

They copy you
What they say about imitation and flattery is true: "Subconsciously, we try to mirror people we like and respect," Reiman says. So if you notice your coworker mimicking your movements—for example, picking up her pen or cupping her chin with her hand when you do—she probably admires you.
What Your Colleagues Really Think of You
Wondering about your workplace relationships? How to tell what your colleagues really think of you
Jennifer Barrett; Additional reporting by Alex Kish

A Coworker Has A Crush On You If...

He goes the extra mile
He spends an hour trying to fix your frozen computer, gives up his chair at a crowded conference room table, or offers to pick you up a latte during his afternoon coffee run. Maybe he's just an incredibly nice guy—but more likely, he's into you.

He drops your name
Saying things like "Hi, Jane," or "How are you doing, Jane?" may seem like common courtesy, but it's actually an intimate gesture. Consider it the verbal equivalent of a touch on the arm—a way to get more personal.

He's a stand-up guy
In the civilized world as in the wild, strong, physically imposing alpha males have the best shot at mating. So men instinctively want to make themselves seem bigger and badder around women they're interested in, Reiman says. If he suddenly stops slouching and puffs out his chest when he's around you (the old "I'm just stretching my arms" routine), take note— he may have a crush.


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Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional
The Body Language Expert
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Top Ten Favorite Books

I am a voracious reader. I devour at least one novel a week. In fact, since junior high I have averaged about two books a week. If you are going to have an addiction, a "Jones" for books is not a bad one. As a body language expert, I am often taken with the talent of certain authors to detail a facial expression, gesture or tone of voice. In my friend John and I's Evening and Emory Class called the Meeting of the Minds we would ask the students to bring their favorite book on the fourth week of class. We often ended up trading Top Ten favorite book lists. My list changes a bit from year to year. The Secret Garden has been on my list since grade school. My affinity for Science fiction is no longer apparent from this list. I have taken off two books that where on the list I had in High School, "Stranger in a Strange Land" and Arthur C Clark's "Childhoods End." Though it is Junior Fiction Phillip Pullman's "The Golden Compass" was not on the list till 1998 when I found it on the search for something like the Harry Potter books. I took that wonderful book off the list this year to put on a book that still haunts me, "The Post Birthday World." While I really enjoyed, "Julie, Julia" and "Eat Pray Love", last year they did not make the list this year. In fact, I am back to old favorites. Here is the current list.

Patti's Top Ten Novels
Prince of Tides by Pat Conroy
About a Boy by Nick Hornsby
Angels Ashes by Frank McCourt
Jane Eyre by Charlotte Brontë
The Moonstone by Wilkie Collins
The Post Birthday World by Lionel Shriver
The Secret Garden by Francis Hodgson Burnett
The Mists of Avalon by Marion Zimmer Bradley
Ahab's Wife by Sena Jeter Nyasaland
The Complete Works of Sherlock Holmes by Sir Arthur Conan Doyle

In Junior High and High School I loved science fiction of all kinds, I read every Agatha Christie novel (I think there are over 87 novels) and everything I could find about King Aurthur and the Knights of the Round Table. In grad school I found the female perspective of the Aurthur legend, "The Mists of Avalon." I can still remember reading the 1,400 page novel over a spring break. Most of the reading was done while I sat in a beach chair at my mom's house in SawGrass Florida. I faced toward the ocean for seven days, but didn't get any sun on my chin, because my face was down inside the novel. The Book description on Amazon says, "Even readers who don't normally enjoy Arthurian legends will love this version, a retelling from the point of view of the women behind the throne. Morgaine (more commonly known as Morgan Le Fay) and Gwenhwyfar (a Welsh spelling of Guinevere) struggle for power, using Arthur as a way to score points and promote their respective worldviews. The Mists of Avalon's Camelot politics and intrigue take place at a time when Christianity is taking over the island-nation of Britain; Christianity vs. Faery, and God vs. Goddess are dominant themes."

Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional
The Body Language Expert
Web- http://www.PattiWood.net
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Speaking, risk.

I called my sister the night before a Live TV interview and shared with her that I was scared out of my ever loving mind. I feared being humiliated in front of a national TV audience and having it forever live on YouTube. She said, "Then why do it?" "Why put yourself through that?" "That doesn't make sense?" I said, "I do it because if I don't do it, I won't know if I can, and that would be excruciating." "If I do do it I will know I can do even more." "I have done this a million times, but if I don't keep working harder, I will not grow."





Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional
The Body Language Expert
Web- http://www.PattiWood.net
I have a new quiz on my YouTubestation. Check it out!
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Not a Timid Soul

After I finish speaking I often have audience members come up and ask how they can speak with out fear. I share with them, that I have many tools that I use that I can teach them to reduce destructive fear, use constructive fear and ride the wave of excitement to enjoy speaking. The fear is there when you care, it inspired you to work hard, to do your very best, and then risk to go beyond the hardest thing you have ever done, go beyond what you think is your very best. To take a step and even dare to leap into the void and believe that you can fly. Here is a quote to inspire you and to continually inspire me.

Roosevelt on Sweat and Timid Souls
One of my absolute favorite quotes.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly; who errs and comes short again and again; because there is not effort without error and shortcomings; but who does actually strive to do the deed; who knows the great enthusiasm, the great devotion, who spends himself in a worthy cause, who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement and who at the worst, if he fails, at least he fails while daring greatly. So that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory nor defeat."
~ Theodore Roosevelt (1858-1919)
American statesman (26th US president: 1901-09)
from "Man in the Arena" Speech given April 23, 1910

Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional
The Body Language Expert
Web- http://www.PattiWood.net
I have a new quiz on my YouTubestation. Check it out!
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Photo-retouching against the law? Attractiveness

In the UK Photo shopping could become illegal. Conservative parliamentarian Valérie Boyer, asks, When writers take a news item or real event and considerably embellish it, they are required to alert readers by calling the work fiction, a novel or a story based on dramatized facts. Why should it be any different for photographs?”
She proposes, "...doctored photos meant for public distribution to carry the warning “Photograph retouched to modify the physical appearance of a person.” and that anyone violating the rule could be fined about $55,000. For more info and the really scary before and after Ralph Lauren Adds link http://ethicalstyle.com/tag/photo-retouching/

Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional
The Body Language Expert
Web- http://www.PattiWood.net
I have a new quiz on my YouTubestation. Check it out!
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Retouched photos, beauty and attractiveness

My friend Jim is a media lighting expert. He also retouches headshots and other still photos. He takes your photo and turns you into a work of art. I told his I wish he could follow me around all day magically retouching my image. But alas, he cannot. I put his retouch of my last head shot on blog entry, but I don’t use that version in my promotional material. I fear that a client or producer who saw the unlined face in the photo might see me show up for a speech or media interview and say, “Where’s Patti?”
The desire for perfect beauty, the ideal shape, smooth unwrinkled skin, make Photo retouching is derigor in print media. Just look at what they did to Madonna, Katie Corack and Demi More in these photos. http://gone-hollywood.com/tag/madonna/
The link takes you to some starteling photo retouching before and afters.
It’s unbelievable. This constant barrage of retouched photos create a standard of beauty that can't be reached by a anyone over the age or 14. In fact, I can even see teenage girls bringing these stars retouched photos into their plastic surgeons and saying, “Make me look like this.” Hummm, if I took Jim’s retouched photo of me to a plastic surgeon...? Excuse me why I warm up my printer. Below is another link.
http://ethicalstyle.com/tag/photo-retouching/


Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional
The Body Language Expert
Web- http://www.PattiWood.net
I have a new quiz on my YouTubestation. Check it out!
YouTube- YouTube - bodylanguageexpert's Channel

Does a Wagging Tail Mean My Dog is Happy?

Does a wagging tail mean your dog is happy?

Dogs often wag their tales when they are anxious and stressed and they use a tale wag with other dogs t show they are submissive. Though most cartoon dogs wag there tail in happiness. Thinking a wagging tale on your dog always means it happy is the most common misconception you can have when reading your dog.

Just as there are many meaning for a human’ smile depending on its speed and how it’s given, there a many meanings for a dogs tail wag depending on its speed and the way it carried. There are over fifty different types of smiles in humans. We smile not only when we are happy but when we are feeling a multitude of other emotions as well. Dog’s tails also communicate many different things.
. Happy dog tail wags differ between breeds. Moreover, just as humans have different personalities and different smiles each dog has his own personality and different wags. So how do you know your dog is giving a happy tail wag?

A good first step is noticing when you dog have a reason to be happy and noticing his wag. How high it is held, the breath of its swing. Catching your dog in a happy moment will help you get what we call a "norm" for your dog. Also note breed and personalities difference first. Consider the general guidelines for reading a tail wag to see if your dog is truly happy, (I have step-by-step instructions for reading a real human smile on my website. www.Pattiwood.net

A Sincere happy smile makes you approachable. In human body language it says “I am friendly I am submissive." and "I respect you, and won’t hurt you.
A dog’s happy tail wag says, “I respect you I am submissive and know that you won’t hurt me.”
A happy sincere smile goes all the way up the face to cheeks the eyes and the brows moving like a wave
A dogs happy tail wag, involves not just the tail it typically also involves the rump that lowers and swings the hips with the tails swing.
A broad smile on a human face says I am friendly.
A broad tail wag says the same thing.
A narrow tight smile says, “Don’t bother me.”
Just as dog’s tail held high over the back with very narrow tight short side to side at high-speed tail movements say, “I'm stressed." or "Back off."

I think it is about time I go give Bo the wonder dog a little treat so I can see his truly happy wagging tail.

As the national spokesperson for Pup-Peroni, I am studying the similarities and differences between human body language and dog behavior.



Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional
The Body Language Expert
Web- http://www.PattiWood.net
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Being a Body Language Expert, Article on Patti Wood in the AJC



Feature article on Patti Wood today in the Atlanta Journal Constitution.
Expert reads signs in gestures
Nonverbal cues can speak volumes.
Electronic interaction has hidden messages, Decatur woman says.
BYLINE: Chandra R. Thomas
For the AJC
DATE: December 30, 2009
PUBLICATION: Atlanta Journal-Constitution, The (GA)
EDITION: Main; The Atlanta Journal-Constitution
SECTION: Living
PAGE: D1

It seems there aren't many downsides to being a body language expert, but if Patti Wood had to choose one, what she'd say sounds a lot like a quote from the flick "The Sixth Sense." Instead of dead people, though, she laments, "I see everything!"

Decatur-based Wood doesn't have visions of corpses dancing in her head but, known in media circles as one of the world's top nonverbal communication experts, she does live in a space where every smile, gesture, handshake and even the way one stands speaks volumes about who people are and how they're feeling. It can be challenging sometimes tuning out the subconscious messages that most of us overlook every day.

"I believe everybody has the ability to read body language and nonverbal communication, but it takes time to learn how to pick it up," she says. "My friends always joke with me about 'revving up my superpowers."

The rest of the article can be found in today's Atlanta Journal Constitution. the link to AJC.com is here. http://www.blogger.com/post-create.g?blogID=19741562
If you have any difficulty getting the article please feel free to email Patti
Patti@PattiWood.net If you like the article or want more info you can send and email to the AJC if you are in the web version of the article scroll down and put a note in the box.


Patti Wood
The Body Language Expert
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First Impressions, He seemed like such a nice person then....

How does someone appear nice to some people and then do something we bad? I was reading an article about the recent attack on the Jetliner in an article on MSMBC.com
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/34592031/ns/us_news-security#story
The suspects father warned the US Embassy about his son but he was still allowed to fly to the US. His school chum describes him as a nice guy in the article.
What we forget is that a friendly, polite people can do bad things. The thought that anyone can appear nice, but do bad is frightening. We want to believe we can gather accurate impressions of someones charachter. That we can protect ourselves from harm.

Nigerian newspaper, ThisDay, said Abdulmutallab began to show his increasingly radical views on Islam during his high school days at the British International School in Lome, Togo. His attendance at the elite college preparatory school, attended by children of diplomats and wealthy Africans, could not be confirmed by school officials on Sunday.

But Efemena Mokedi remembered Abdulmutallab from their days on the basketball team at the exclusive school as "a smart kid" and "a friendly person."

"He was a very religious person, a very honest person. He was friends with all the teachers," said Mokedi, who now lives in the United States, in an interview broadcast on the BBC. "Yes, I'm very surprised. ... This is really out of how he is as a person. This is unexpected ... He's a very good guy, a very good chap." Aides to President Barack Obama are pondering how terror watch-lists are used after the botched attack, according to officials who described the discussions Saturday on the condition of anonymity so as not to pre-empt possible official announcements.

These adjustments came after the Justice Department charged that Abdulmutallab willfully attempted to destroy or wreck an aircraft; and that he placed a destructive device in the plane.



Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional
The Body Language Expert
Web- http://www.PattiWood.net
I have a new quiz on my YouTubestation. Check it out!
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Things that Go Bump in the night, Hearing

My family calls me bat ears because I am so sensitive to noise that I need an especially quiet room to sleep. I have been teased to my sensitively every family trip and holiday and request what the family calls the best "bat cave" aka coolest, darkest farthest from teenagers, TV and breakfast noise sleeping quarters. New Research suggests that the wimpy people are more sensitive to approaching noise. Aha, I am five one and weigh... Well, let's say I am a size 2, so I fit the wimpy category so it makes sense via the biological imparative that I feel the need for a quiet place to sleep. If I sent my family the link to this post I am sure they would happily give me bar bells for Christmas> Read the research at
http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2009/04/090426094051.htmPatti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional
The Body Language Expert
Web- http://www.PattiWood.net
I have a new quiz on my YouTubestation. Check it out!
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Fear and Social Anxiety, genetic link?

Is fear genitic or a result of experience. Research in May of 2008 shows that their is a genitic link to fear and aniexty. http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2009/03/090310161503.htm

Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional
The Body Language Expert
Web- http://www.PattiWood.net
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Do men marry their mothers?

I think I need to find a man whoes mother had a masters degree. New research suggests that men with educated mothers say they think smart women make better wives. http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2008/05/080505223427.htmPatti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional
The Body Language Expert
Web- http://www.PattiWood.net
I have a new quiz on my YouTubestation. Check it out!
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Is Anger Bad for Your Health?

My dad had a temper. Not that unusual for men of his generation. After all my dad was a fighter pilot and fought in two wars. While I am sure is quick thinking and combativeness helped him in battle, my sisters and I always suspected that his anger didn't help his health. Recent research says that hostility in men does predict poor heart health in men but does not clearly predict poor heart health in women. http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2005/11/051115171537.htm.

If you wonder why it does not effect women in the same way read this research.
http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2005/11/051115171537.htm It turns out that outwardly expressed anger is the problem. Who knew that women, raised to be nice, smile and stuff anger would have a heart health benefit.
Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional
The Body Language Expert
Web- http://www.PattiWood.net
I have a new quiz on my YouTubestation. Check it out!
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Do men really have it bad?

"Women have it so good, men work hard and women outlive them.
One of the topics my Thursday night Meeting of the minds discussion group continues to return to is the discussion by some men in the group that women have all the advantages in life and men have all the disadvantages. I recently read a study showing at least one piece of research to prove that men have it bad story is more myth than fact. You may have heard that men die before women, but findings in the the Journal of Women's Health, reflect a change from previous decades medical records that when older men were at greater risk for heart disease. Instead this research shows over the last 10 years, older women are doing worse, while men are doing better.

Women's risk for heart disease is still lower than men's through middle age. But the break-even point at which women catch up to men is now at age 60, 10 years earlier than before.

Why pink is for girls and blue is for boys.

Why pink is for girls and blue is for boys.
Do you ever wonder why you know that the baby in the blue blanket is a boy and the baby in the pink blanket is a girl? Most trivia sites will tell you that in ancient Rome they feared that evil spirits might steal the souls of babies while they slept. Since they believed that the color blue protected someone against soul theft and they valued boys they swaddled boy babies in blue cloth at night so that evil spirits could not get them. They did not think that the evil spirits would value girl babies any more than they did so they did not feel the need to swaddle them at all. Pink did not become known as the de rigor color for girls until the 1900 is when children curious about where babies came from where told by Victorian parents they came from cabbage patches. The children guessed that boys came from blue cabbages but wondered what color cabbages girls came in and pink is for girls came into the cultural lexicon. Sceintific research shows that men actually prefer the color blue and women prefer the redder shade of blue, pink or lavender. http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2007/08/070820120720.htm. Resaerch done by
The researchers include Anya C. Hurlbert and Yazhu Ling of Newcastle Univesity in Newcastle upon Tyne,UK. Hurlbert and Ling: "Biological components of sex differences in colour preference." Publishing in Current Biology, 21 August 2007, R623-625.

Researchers have not studied babies color preferences so they are not sure about whether nature or nurture has a hand in color preference but theorize that women’s pink preference is nature’s way of helping women chose ripe red fruit and men’s preference for blue comes from their need to determine good weather or a good water source.
Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional
The Body Language Expert
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Santa's Body Language, What is St. Nick saying with his nonverbal cues in the poem, "The Night Before Christmas."

Santa's Body Language, What is St. Nick saying with his nonverbal cues in the poem, "The Night before Christmas."

What is Santa saying with his body language?
A nonverbal analysis of Santa’s nonverbal cues in the poem, The Night before Christmas.

On Christmas Eve, when I was a little girl my mother would get out a very special tall storybook covered with snowy glitter and read, the poem "The Night Before Christmas."
Clement Clarke Moore composed "A Visit from St. Nicholas" on December 24, 1822 and though there were other nonverbal descriptions of St, Nick, the iconic image of Santa in this poem is stuck firmly into our consciousness like leftover Christmas cookie dough.

Let’s have some fun and look at nonverbal cues St Nick shows in this famous Christmas poem. The poem opens on Christmas Eve on a house top roof with Santa described as a "little old driver, so lively and quick. His advanced age, makes us think of him as comforting and fatherly but the nonverbal description of his behavior makes us also see him youthful, vital and full of energy as well. He is, "...lively and quick." Therefore, we know he has enough energy to defy the boundaries of time and space and deliver toys to every boy and girl in one night!
Next, Santa is heard whistling, shouting, and calling his reindeer by name. If he were described as shouting, we probably would see Santa as a rather grouchy, aggressive guy. After all, you really shouldn’t yell at animals. However, because he is knows and says every reindeer’s names we have a perception of him as a warm and caring guy who loves his reindeer and shouting becomes something he does because he excited and needs to make sure each name is heard over the din of the sleigh bells. Whistling is also a revealing nonverbal activity. The combination of the shouting and whistling tell us Santa is filled with joy and gusto as he calls his beloved reindeer to action. The powerful paralanguage acts of shouting, whistling also assures the little boys, and girls hearing the poem that Santa will get will get to our houses in time for us to get our presents Christmas morning.
Then St. Nick comes down the chimney, “with a bound.” I love that nonverbal behavior. The action, "bounding" makes me see this red and white decked man bouncing from house to house as if the fireplace was a trampoline. This nonverbal cue also lets us know that he is fun guy having a good time at work. He is as a daredevil. He rides through the air in a sleigh and then jumps down a chimney without a parachute. Yes, Santa lives on the edge. Each and every time he jumps he risks landing in a fire! In fact, these nonverbal cues are evidence that Santa is a truly bearded superhero.

Though he is not wearing the typical super hero outfit, instead, “He was dressed all in fur, from his head to his foot.” OK, I will admit there are mythic superheroes in the fur and leather set; Shera, Thor, Grey skull and my all-time fav, Tarzan. The fur gives him some primal superpowers. Visualizing Santa in shear spandex and tights would not illicit a fatherly figure... Santa is not described as wearing red and white is this poem, even though I gave him those super hero colors two paragraphs ago. Red and White were the colors set into our Santa conscious through artists’ depictions in the 1920’s, most notably by an artist at Harper's. For trivia buffs this was long before Coca Cola created its string of ads picturing the red and white Clause. Though trivia websites often quote Coke soft drink company as the creators of his candy cane colored suit, Coca Cola give us a larger man sized Santa rather than the little elf fellow of this poem.
Red and white make a good dashing through the snow costume. Red is nonverbally a traditional power color. The color red is associated with strength, force, power, control and leadership, stimulation, warmth, excitement, good health, physical energy, and love. In addition, white is associated with protection, purity, truth and sincerity. However, the purity from the white was in his heart not on his sleeve, because; the poem says, “his clothes were all tarnished with ashes and soot.” Don’t you just love that detail? It makes us see him as a playful guy who is willing to get dirty.
In that same line, you read that the bundle of toys is, “flung” on his back. He doesn’t carry the bundle like a burden, but instead it is flung with joy, the same way a kid would carry his baseball gear to a game or her camping stuff on an outdoor adventure.

As an expert on smiling, I love the next description. “His eyes -- how they twinkled! His dimples how merry!
His cheeks were like roses, his nose like a cherry! His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow.”
I especially like this description. As a child as I heard each facial feature I would touch my own eyes, cheeks, nose and mouth along with all the other listeners and we would laugh. Who knows, this may have been the beginning of my love for body language!
If you read my nonverbal articles on eyes and smiling on my website or read the chapter on eyes and or smiling in my body language book you know that twinkling implies that the eyes are pulled up at the side and there are little smile wrinkles around the eye. These facial cues indicate real happiness. The mouth drawn up like a bow puts St. Nick’s mouth in smiling kiss position. We also have the wonderful description of his broad face. In face reading, also known also known as “Personaligy” a broad face (the height and width of the face are similar measurements) indicates someone with a confident nature, someone who has a big full picture of life, loves adventure, and has strong influencing abilities. The perfect guy to manage toy production and keep the elves motivated at the North Pole. He is also the person to see the good girls and boys deliver their toys all over the world without GPS. The smile combined with an open face that shows friendliness.
Let us skip the stump of pipe and smoke, realizing that Something Santa did before the surgeon general put out the tobacco memo. Instead, let’s skip down to the next part of the poem the description of St. Nick’s tummy, “A little round belly that shook when he laughed like a bowl full of jelly.” This combined with his description as, “chubby and plump, a right jolly old elf,” Actually conjures up images of cute a cuddly laughing baby. We cannot help but smile. Santa is full of satisfaction and happy. He is not starving on the Adkins diet, craving bread.
Santa then gives traditional nonverbal cues to show he is harmless and not going to attack with, “A wink of his eye and a twist of his head.” Winking is a way of softening what could be threatening continuous eye contact. That is why I recommend it in my chapter on flirting in my new first impressions book. The head tilt is softening cue showing “I’m harmless.” Together these body language cues let the narrator of the story who just saw a stranger who just bounded into his living room carrying a sack is charming interloper, not a dangerous intruder planning to abscond with the silver.
Santa does not speak but gets right to work putting out the toys. Anyone who has read the latest research on the costs of multitasking knows this makes Santa not only a hard worker but a wise man as well. Santa is "Driver" type on the DISC personality inventory, manly man who gets the job done quickly.
Then he shows his super powers again by, “laying his finger aside of his nose and giving a nod” and rising up the chimney. When I was in first grade and saw the movie about the first Super Nanny Mary Poppins, I watched her go up in the air by laughing as everyone sang, “I love to laugh.” I thought Santa must have taught her the laugh to levitate trick.
And isn’t interesting that he touches his nose before he rises, just like the 60’s housewife witch Samantha wiggled her nose On the TV show Bewitched. The nose has its own nonverbal symbolism so,”... putting his finger aside of his nose.” indicates that Santa is doing something special and secretive.
Then St. Nick springs to his sleigh, whistles, and shouts his farewell leaving us with a final nonverbal description of his confidence and omnipotence.
I love this poem and I love the Iconic Image of Santa it invokes. It is an image I have taken to bed with me on many a Christmas Eve. It is a wonderful comforting image for all good little boys and girls around the world.
Take time to re-read this wonderful poem during this holiday season.

THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS
by Clement Clarke Moore
or Henry Livingston

'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house

Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse;

The stockings were hung by the chimney with care,

In hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be there;

The children were nestled all snug in their beds,

While visions of sugar-plums danced in their heads;

And mamma in her 'kerchief, and I in my cap,

Had just settled down for a long winter's nap,

When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,

I sprang from the bed to see what was the matter.

Away to the window I flew like a flash,

Tore open the shutters and threw up the sash.

The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow

Gave the lustre of mid-day to objects below,

When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,

But a miniature sleigh, and eight tiny reindeer,

With a little old driver, so lively and quick,

I knew in a moment it must be St. Nick.

More rapid than eagles his coursers they came,

And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name;

"Now, Dasher! now, Dancer! now, Prancer and Vixen!

On, Comet! on Cupid! on, Donner and Blitzen!

To the top of the porch! to the top of the wall!

Now dash away! dash away! dash away all!"

As dry leaves that before the wild hurricane fly,

When they meet with an obstacle, mount to the sky,

So up to the house-top the coursers they flew,

With the sleigh full of toys, and St. Nicholas too.

And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the roof

The prancing and pawing of each little hoof.

As I drew in my head, and was turning around,

Down the chimney St. Nicholas came with a bound.

He was dressed all in fur, from his head to his foot,

And his clothes were all tarnished with ashes and soot;

A bundle of toys he had flung on his back,

And he looked like a peddler just opening his pack.

His eyes -- how they twinkled! his dimples how merry!

His cheeks were like roses, his nose like a cherry!

His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow,

And the beard of his chin was as white as the snow;

The stump of a pipe he held tight in his teeth,

And the smoke it encircled his head like a wreath;

He had a broad face and a little round belly,

That shook, when he laughed like a bowlful of jelly.

He was chubby and plump, a right jolly old elf,

And I laughed when I saw him, in spite of myself;

A wink of his eye and a twist of his head,

Soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread;

He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,

And filled all the stockings; then turned with a jerk,

And laying his finger aside of his nose,

And giving a nod, up the chimney he rose;

He sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle,

And away they all flew like the down of a thistle.

But I heard him exclaim, ere he drove out of sight,

"Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good-night."



Patti Wood, MA,
The Body Language Expert
Web- http://www.PattiWood.net
I have a new quiz on my YouTubestation. Check it out!
YouTube- YouTube - bodylanguageexpert's Channel

Attention span, Grabbing your audiance, First Impression

GRAB AUDIENCE ATTENTION WITH POWERFUL OPENINGS
If adult attention spans are limited...and they are...(a study by the Navy determined the average adult attention span is 18 minutes One research study actually
suggested that the attention span of most adolescents is about 11
minutes -- roughly the time between commercials in a typical
television show.?
Studies on attention span also shed light on why students have
difficulty with the traditional lecture format. Adult learners can
keep tuned in to a lecture for no more than 15 to 20 minutes at a
time, and this at the beginning of the class. In 1976, A. H. Johnstone
and F. Percival observed students in over 90 lectures, with twelve
different lecturers, recording breaks in student attention. They
identified a general pattern: After three to five minutes of "settling
down" at the start of class, one study found that "the next lapse of
attention usually occurred some 10 to 18 minutes later, and as the
lecture proceeded the attention span became shorter and often fell to
three or four minutes towards the end of a standard lecture." Other
studies appear to confirm these findings.?
Mittendorf and Kalish note that studies on attention span indicate
that, when passively absorbing information, adult learners usually
experience mental lapses after a mere 15-20 minutes.?
), then it's critical that business presenters craft a memorable message to enhance retention. One way to be memorable is to grab your audience's attention when you begin your speech with a attention grabbing opener.

A powerful opening gives your audience a reason for listening. A bonus is that getting them engaged and interested right at the beginning will minimize any nervousness you may be feeling.



Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional
The Body Language Expert
Web- http://www.PattiWood.net
I have a new quiz on my YouTubestation. Check it out!
YouTube- YouTube - bodylanguageexpert's Channel

Bad gifts, What is message Gifts, Funny gifts for Christmas

Today a journalist from a large magazine was looking for stories of the worst gift you have ever gotten. As soon as I started thinking about it, I was laughing and transported back to Christmases past like a short blond Ebenezer Scrooge. Bad presents certainly send a nonverbal message. I have received many bad Christmas presents and certainly some, "What was she thinking" gifts. I am an expert in nonverbal communication and absolutely love to buy the perfect present for my friends each Christmas, but I am sure with my wacky sense of style and penchant for garage sales I have as well. In fact I am sure my family goes, "What crazy gift will Patti give us this year!"
Let me start by saying that thank goodness, I have a great fun filled family and good sense of humor. We spend several laughter filled hours opening our presents and making funny comments. We truly love each other and for me bad gifts just means fodder for me for a great story for my next speech. I would say the most embarrassing was given to me at my first Christmas celebrated with my future in-laws. I opened a big pink box containing a gift of a 50-dollar gift certificate to Victoria Secret, from my future in-laws!
Worse yet, my fiancé had fibbed and told them that is what I wanted! The next gift I opened that Christmas was a Victoria Secret flimsy lace nightie from him. We did not get married

Worst gifts, again so many. My 40th Christmas my mother only gift was a set of green feather dusters from Walgreen's because she said, "Your house is dusty." That same Christmas my sister gave me a wonderful set a fiesta dishes. Yes it would seem that that was an awesome presents.But, as I opened them my sister said, “We were saving them to give them to you when you got married, but it doesn’t look like that’s going to happen so we thought we better give them to you now.”
Close third for the list of worst gift ever after giving wonderful though at times eccentric presents to my cherished nieces and nephews for over 30 years my 25-year-old niece sent me a Trader Joe's grocery bag for Christmas last year. She had sent everyone else in the family homemade soaps and bath salts. I guess that meant she thought I was clean but hungry. I hope it did not mean she saw a future for me as a bag lady.

Ohhh I forgot the year my best friend gave me an ironing board and a full-length mirror. I fear that was hint to press my clothes and look in the mirror before I left the house.

I just got off the phone with my sister and we started laughing so hard as we talked about all the funny gifts our charming, but eccentric mother has given us over the years, The picked over “free gift” makeup my mother got from buying something for herself from Estee Lauder. The wine gift basket she gave my sister and brother in law for their anniversary that was dusty and still had the gift tag with her name on it that someone had given her for her birthday the year before. My sister’s biggest laugh came recalling the year she got married and mom sent her first Christmas gift to her new son in law, the two free giant troll dolls she got as a gift from the bank for opening an account. Robin said her new Husband held up to his ears and said, “Was it the close resemblance that inspired this gift?” She said the most painful gift was the skirt my mother gave my sister one Christmas that was a size 20 skirt. My sister who was in her thirties and had recently worked hard to lose baby weight was a size 12. When my sister held up the skirt my Mom said, “It was such a good buy, and you will grow into it!”

I thought of the Christmas my shy sister got a shocker present. This sister is very conservative, she likes to blend in the background so she only wears blue, white, and tan and mostly lives in T-shirts and blue jeans. She hates bright colors and prissy clothes. One year my mother gave her a huge box of Lilly Pulitzer clothes in hot pink, celandine green, purple and turquoise. The clothes were all print dresses, skirts and tops. My sister was mortified even to try them on and my mom insisted that she alter them for her over Christmas so my sister could wear them right away.
Ahh the love of Christmas.
Patti Wood, MA, CSP
The Body Language Expert
Phone-404-315-7397
Web- http://www.PattiWood.netBlog- http://www.http://www.bodylanguagelady.com
POSTED BY BODY LANGUAGE EXPERT PATTI WOOD MA CSP AT 9:51 AM 0 COMMENTS
LABELS: WORST GIFT YOU HAVE EVER RECEIVED IDEA FOR STORIES IN YOUR SPEECHES








Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional
The Body Language Expert
Web- http://www.PattiWood.net
I have a new quiz on my YouTubestation. Check it out!
YouTube- YouTube - bodylanguageexpert's Channel

Patti will be on CNN at 12:30 "Obama's Body Language durring speech on Tuesday December 01/ on Affganistan

I will be on CNN at 12:30 this afternoon or slighly later speaking about Obama's direct comments to the American public and to Afganistan's people,

Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional
The Body Language Expert
Web- http://www.PattiWood.net
I have a new quiz on my YouTubestation. Check it out!
YouTube- YouTube - bodylanguageexpert's Channel

Make up Favorites

I have been doing programs with Carrer Coach Gail Geary on How to Always Look Young for Job Interview. Many of the women in the workshops have been asking me for my personal make up regime. Here are my make up recommendations.
Make up for Woman.
Make sure you do wear make-up, but use keep it light. Some people are surprised that by aplying a moisturizer and primer first they need very little base and they end up looking more natural rather than "made up."

• Every day when I wake up in the morning let out my dog out and then wash my face and put on "Aveeno Positively Ageless Moisturizer with SPF 30. It is inexpensive and comes in a pump bottel so I can put it on quickly. I love a beauty regime that is quick and possible to do while I am talking on the cell phone or eating breakfast.
Before I put on my make up I rinse my face and but on Aveeno then I put on my fav make up secret. You must have it it is called Smash box Photo Finish Primer. It is amazing. It makes your make up go on smoothly and really helps your skin look fresh and yet it helps the makeup last all day. And I mean 6:00 in the morning till midnight all day.
• For my base make up, I love Laura Mercier tinted moisturizer. That’s what I wear every day unless I am speaking.
• I have tried every under eye concealer on the planet. I have a under eye concealer family in the bottom drawer of my vanity. I have spent a fortune trying to get rid of the dark circles. The only one that works all day I found out about when I was preparring for my first TV show on PBS. It is called Lancôme Effacernes waterproof under eye concealer.
• Three of the top makeup artists that I work with on video and photo shoots use my fav eye shadow. It is Lancôme color design. It last all day. You don't even need to take the time to use eye shadow primer.
• If you wear eye shadow, take your finger and lay it on the outside of eye and sweep any shadow up and out from your eye. Always remember UP!
• If you wear eyeliner make sure it goes UP slightly and the corner of your eye.
• Don’t wear eyeliner on your bottom lid and don’t use mascara there it pulls the eye down and makes it look tired and older.
• I love Lancôme’s mascara. It makes your lashed look huge, but you have to use powder under your eyes, as good mascaras tend to smear throughout the day.
• When you put on blush make sure to use it sparingly and make it go UP around your eyes never down.
• If I use powder blush I use my big brush and use one stroke on each cheek. If it lasts on you, I suggest a cream blush, as the new makeup style is dewy not dry and powdered. Be very careful of lipstick. I draw around the edge with a very soft Estee Lauder lipstick pencil. My favorite is Rose. I draw it on then press my lips together and blend very well so it covers my entire lip and then I put on a light clear pink gloss. If I need all day coverage for my lipstick, I use Max Factor Color Stay in a rose shade and put gloss on throughout the day.


Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional
The Body Language Expert
Web- http://www.PattiWood.net
I have a new quiz on my YouTubestation. Check it out!
YouTube- YouTube - bodylanguageexpert's Channel