Methods of dealing with Conflict learned from the echidna

Would keeping cool under stress make you live longer? Well, if you were to model the behavior of the long-beaked echidna, one of the oldest, most passive and silliest-looking mammals on the planet, you might try a little “You live your life and I live mine” philosophy to increase your longevity.
According to echidna researcher Dr. Peggy Rismiller of the University of Adleaide in a New York Times article on the ehidna www://www.nyt.com,echidnas are not only “the oldest surviving mammalian group, but individual monotremes can live 50 years or longer.”
So what specific conflict tools do they use? Well according to Take, 1952, when disturbed an echidna buries itself rapidly in the ground. Now that reminds me of men I have dated. Forget the guys going into the cave a la Grey's Mars vs. Venus to fight stress, just bury yourself in the ground when you're upset. In my workshops, I do teach that there are times to avoid conflict, but I wouldn’t recommend staying underground too long. Someone might forget you were mad and walk right over you.
Maybe we should learn to be level headed like the echidna. Though if 50 percent of our brain was the language rich, reasoning, rational thinking neocortex like the Echidna's instead of the measly 30 percent we have, it might be easier not to rant and rave under stress. Again being reasonable is always great, but I recommend making conflict management choices based on the situation rather than shouting out to the galaxy that we all need is to be more logical-- a sort of Star Trek's Spock-- under stress. Of course, there may be another reason the pacifistic echidna can deal well with conflict and live a long life. They are covered with spines. When I meet anyone spinney I know I avoid conflict with them. So let’s add one more conflict management choice to the mix. Sometimes it’s good to be sharp and aggressive. So what have we learned? Be like a long-beaked echidna and have more than one way of dealing with conflict. You can choose to:
1. Let it go and don't stress about it
2. Leave it or avoid it
3. Be logical and reasonable
4. Be aggressive
5. Be weird looking
For specific tools to deal effectively with conflict you may wish to check out my books, “The Conflict Cure” and “Sword Shields Daggers and Handshakes” on the products page of my website www.pattiwood.net or consider having me come in to speak to your group or talking to me about one-on-one coaching.

Music Memories

The article about song memories that I referred two posts ago just appeared here is the link. I am quoted in the second paragraph.
http://tunesnews.com/love-music-and-memories/
Since then my grad school roommate and I have reminisced about listening the Sade's song. "You give me the sweetest taboo." while we danced around the house one night before going out. It was a good memory as I spent almost every night for seven years of grad school studying at the house or library or at my night job heading a survey research team. Going out was a big treat and going out with my roommate who was and is so much fun was a special treat.
We also remembered being in the car with a guy freind and rocking out to a song about MTV. We sang the lyrics on the phone with each other yesterday and were transported back to the eighties. Ahh.....music memories.

Fear of germs and use of antibacterial liquid

Oh my goodness, more news on antibactirial liquid. I was watching a special on NBC about Obama's West Wing and the dispensers showed up on the desks of Obama's secretary and several cabinet members and they mentioned his "body guy" carries some for the president. We have become germaphobic. I can just see it now. Obama shaking hands with UK prime minister Gordon Brown and then asking for a antigerm blast from his presidential dispenser.

Do you have "song memories?"

I responded to a media query today about music memories from a journalist at Tunes News – http://tunesnews.com
The piece is going to be about songs and the memories that they evoke. The entire piece is revolving around the upcoming release of Song Journals – http://songjournals.com , which is dedicated people sharring their song memories. Do you have memories that come to you when you hear certain songs?

I am very interested in the concept of song journals. My journals from teenage years up untill till about five years ago were filled with the titles of songs. I would write in not just the titles but because I wanted to be a lyricist often the song lyrics. As an expert on nonverbal communication I am fascinated with the connection in the limbic brain of music to emotion and memory.

As a kid in sixties, I remember sitting in the way way back of the station wagon singing along with my two sisters t “See you in September” as my family drove to Florida one summer.
In the seventies I remember sitting together with my three best girlfriends in the front seat of a old 56 seven Chevy car dancing to “I shot the sheriff. “ on the way to a high school football game. In fact I was with my high school best friend Rose yesterday and we shared that mutual memory.
Also in the seventies I remember listening one Sunday afternoon to Casey Casem’s top 40 on the whole house stereo. I was dancing around my house pool to the rock hit “Smoke on the Water.” In junior high, I remember standing up against the wall at big school dance feeling so lonely and humiliated because no one asked me to dance to “Color my World.” For four years whenever I heard that song I longed to dance to it and finally I was able to in my senior year of high school and I now have a fantastic memory of dancing to it with my high school crush, a college boy, at a church dance!
I also remember singing John Denver’s “Almost heaven West Virginia” with members of my church youth group. We were on top of a roof repairing it for an Appalachian women on a church mission to West Virginia. I remember we thought it was so funny to be on a roof in West Virginia putting hot tar on the roof on a hot summer day singing that song.

Do you have song memories?

Fear of germs in the USA, anitbacterial liquid dispensers

I have a friend from Paris visiting me this weekend. Michael found out I wanted to start a body language discussion group and wanted me to start it today. So check out my Facebook group, Body Language Discussion Group. Since Michael arrived Friday, he has been fascinated by all the antibacterial liquid dispensers and signs about washing hands and other funny cleanliness issues in the States. We went to Wendy's today. I know, I know, I am taking him to all the hot spots in the U.S. (I need to explain that they don't have Wendy's in France and Michael worked at Wendy's in High School.) The Wendy's manager who was serving us said, "Thank you for washing your hands," to an employee returning from the restroom. Michael asked her about it and she said it is something they have to say so the customers know the employees wash their hands. He simply could not figure out why we are so germ conscious. I said it was marketing by the companies that make all the germ-fighting products. I shared with him my experiences with people’s fear of shaking hands that I have written about on my website and here on my blog. What do you think about our fear of germs in the U.S.? Do you think it is affecting our interactions? If you live in or travel to other countries what are the differences?