6 Secrets to Negotiating a Raise Like a Boss
Whether you’re negotiating the terms
of your contract before accepting the job or asking for a raise that reflects
your value as an employee, asking for more money is a skill you’ll rely on time
and again throughout your entire career. Having “The Talk” can be complicated,
not to mention intimidating. But because the gender pay gap is far too wide,
with women making a national average of 79 cents for every man’s dollar,
championing your self-worth has never been more important.
“This is a very complicated issue,
but what we do know is that the pay gap starts as soon as a woman throws her
graduation cap in the air,” says Deepti Gudipati, VP of Member Leadership
Programs at the American Association of University Women (AAUW), a leading
organization promoting equity and education for women and girls. “The AAUW’s research shows that just
one year out of college, women working full time already earn less than their
male colleagues earn—even when they have the same major and work in the same
field.”
The Equal Pay Act hasn’t been updated since 1963,
so it’s up to us to institute change. Until Congress takes actionable steps
toward equality, celebrate Equal Pay Day tomorrow by using these tips from the
pros.
1. Choose Syntax Wisely
“Our research suggests you should pronounce the ‘give’ in negotiations rather
than the ‘take.’ In salary negotiations, this means what the other party gains
from you,” says Roman Trötschel, a researcher and professor in the department
of social and organizational psychology at the University of Lüneburg.
First, gauge the other party’s
underlying interests: What does your boss or the recruiter want, and why? “Most
employees only talk about the money without emphasizing what they are willing
to give. This leads to a huge power imbalance,” he says. It’s crucial to have
an arsenal of evidence-backed defenses at the ready when asking for more money.
Make mental notes (or better yet, a fact sheet documenting all the targets
you’ve exceeded or projects you’ve initiated). Here are some safe phrases to
put your boss’s mind at ease:
Through my work, the company gained
x, y, and z in the last years.
If you agree, we both could win . . .
I’m offering to take on the
following tasks in the future
. . .
And be decisive. A recent study by
Trötschel published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology
found that saying something declarative to the effect of “I charge $50 per hour
for my services” is more effective than asking, “Will you accept $50 an hour?”
2. Pose Powerfully
Sure, it’s easy to relegate yourself to the confines of email when discussing
touchy topics like money, but schedule an IRL meeting with your boss and you’ll
reap major financial rewards. Not only does that suggest you’re serious about
making a case for yourself, but it will give you the opportunity to power pose.
A recent Harvard Business School study found that those
who adopted expansive, high-power poses, as opposed to contracted ones like
hand clasping, performed better during high-stakes professional settings. The
study also found that nailing these nonverbal poses reduces stress and anxiety,
giving you the confidence to fake it until you make it (the money that is).
3.
Perfect Your Voice
It’s all in the delivery. Don’t deviate radically from your natural intonation,
since that could come off as insincere, but if you have a bad case of vocal fry
(a common speech trait in women where definitive statements come off as
questions), now’s the time to keep it in check.
To
complicate matters a bit more, a study published in NeuroImage,
a Journal of Brain Function, found that your boss, regardless of their gender,
may interpret a high-pitched female voice differently than a male’s, activating
certain regions in the brain that may process information in a
gender-discriminatory way. The (somewhat) good news? “You can train [your
voice] to be lower,” says Patti Wood, president of Communication Dynamics, body
language expert, and author of Snap: Making the Most of First Impressions,
Body Language & Charisma. She suggests deep relaxation using in-and-out
breathing counting on the count of three to relax the vocal cords. Use caution
when pepping yourself up on coffee or iced beverages, since they can shrink
your vocal cords, registering your voice higher.
4.
Dress the Part
If a picture can speak a thousand words, perhaps your outfit can speak a
thousand bucks. Before that meeting with your boss, think critically about what
you want your appearance to convey. Of course, don’t show up completely
unrecognizable, but go the extra mile to iron out any creases in your blouse.
“More
than anything, you have to feel your very best in whatever you’re wearing. It
has to be your favorite, whether a skirt or a jacket,” says Wood. “Whatever you
wear needs to have a power or comfort to it. Do what feels best for you.”
Employ power colors like red and black that tend to make people feel protected
and strong. Finally, Wood recommends sticking to flats since they’ll help you
maintain balance both mentally and physically.
5.
Visualize Success
In moments of stress, our brains tend to shut down, which does little in the
way of putting your best negotiating skills forward. Instead of letting your
mind travel to dark places of failure, condition it to do just the opposite.
“Actually
visualize and script out your success. Think of that as an obstacle course that
you’re winning,” Wood says. This way, your brain is already familiar with
feelings of success, so you’ll be more confident. She says she’s seen it work
wonders for clients.
6.
Stay True to Your Feminine Side
Women often have a strong kind, nurturing side, and those traits often don’t
fit within the traditional schema of “power.” But there’s a silver lining. “One
thing you want to use in negotiation is your ability to read people,” says
Wood. “We’re adept at that: being able to understand people. You can read
people to know how far to push or how soft you need to be. See it as a
strength.”
Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at
www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at
www.snapfirstimpressions.com. Also check out Patti's YouTube channel at
http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.
