nonverbal communication, baby and dog video
I love the Bonnie Hunt Show. So, instead of my usual academic read of some one's body language, here is a video from her show of a baby and a dog greeting each other nonverbally. If you read my blog you know I am the queen of handshakes. Who knew that dogs and babies had their own unique handshakes. It shouldn't surprise us dogs have been bred to read human body language more accurately than chimpanzees. To read more about handshakes just type it in my blog or go read the perfect handshake article on my website at www.Pattwood.net
How to Become a Body Language Expert
I got an email from Dr. Paul Ekman's office yesterday. After I stoped jumping up and down with excitement, I answered his assistant's request. Since the new TV show, "Lie To Me" based on Dr. Ekman's life has come out, his office is getting queries on how to become a body language expert. Here is my answer.
It was so kind of you to contact me. Dr. Paul Ekman is my idol. I read his research in my first nonverbal class when I was 19 years old, I quoted his research on my Master’s and Doctoral exams and I have been sharing the results of his research with my audiences since I taught my first body language class at Florida State in the 80’s.
There are many ways to become an expert in any field and I will give you different paths to take. I will start with the most arduous and then give you easier routes.
It was so kind of you to contact me. Dr. Paul Ekman is my idol. I read his research in my first nonverbal class when I was 19 years old, I quoted his research on my Master’s and Doctoral exams and I have been sharing the results of his research with my audiences since I taught my first body language class at Florida State in the 80’s.
There are many ways to become an expert in any field and I will give you different paths to take. I will start with the most arduous and then give you easier routes.
The first path is one that I chose. Get a degree. Don't freak out. The academic route is rewarding. If You want to pursue a full education I recommend you look for universities that have a program in Nonverbal Communication in a their -Communication Department, but also have a strong psychology, sociology, business communication and or anthropology departments. I was able to take courses in other colleges within my University to create my undergrad degree and I feel that truly helped me have a strong foundation in both brain research and the social interaction research on nonverbal communication.
Another path is take just take a college course on the topic. Look online at the college course catalogue. The course may be listed as nonverbal communication, but you may have to go deeper into the course description. Typically, you find courses that have a section or module on the topic under Psychology or Communication. You may also find them in the Business School or in the Anthropology Department or in the Sociology Department.
If someone wants a different kind of education please let them know I am taking on students for one on one coaching. I also take on student interns to work with me in my business.
Please let Dr. Ekman know I enjoy the television show and marvel at the accuracy of the nonverbal information. It is wonderful to have this show on the air for those of us who teach and have a passion for the field of nonverbal communication. If there is anything else you would like to know please feel free to call me.
The web is full of information, but some of it is far to simplistic and some is just plain wrong. Look for the experts with degrees in the field. When you do a Google search use the word "research, as the first word in the search. Read www.SceinceDailyNews.com
You may also want to find read some of the best books on the subject. I recommend going deep and reading all of Paul Eckman's books. Also read Desmond Morris' seminal contributions to the field.
Another path or mode of learning is to become a keen observer. Watch talk shows, look closely at the behavior. I have a chart in my Success Signals book that you can use to note when certain nonverbal behaviors occur and how many times they occur. One of the key times to watch is the pause before someone speaks. There are the micro expressions that Paul Ekman discovered that occur in that fraction of a second. They are the truthful expressions. Start looking for what people say, before the words come out. Then, observe what they do with their face movement and gestures and body, just as they finish speaking. There is the least amount of control at those moments so there is so much truth in those moments.
Don't over analyze your daily interactions; it will take you out of the real moment with people. It can make you crazy, or just make other people think you are crazy. Instead, observe as an outsider. Go the mall or the airport or the bookstore or coffeehouse or the grocery store and see if you can predict people’s next actions or get gut impressions of how people respond to waitress or cashier. For that matter, do something I do. Look for the nice people. For example, look at all the cashiers at Target, observe their nonverbal cues and decide which cashier will make your interaction the best. Personally, I look for the person who appears friendly, and present rather than an autotron. For you, that may mean choosing someone who is fast. Form an impression then predict their future behavior. Test your skills.
You can also look for a mentor or coach to guide you through the process. Find someone who is skilled at reading people as well as a good teacher.
Personally, I earned two degrees in communication with a specialization in Nonverbal Communication and did an additional four years of Doctoral coursework in nonverbal communication and taught Nonverbal Communication at the University level for many years. I have also been doing research on the topic since the early 80’s. My favorite areas of research are first impressions, handshakes and greeting behavior, rapport building, gender differences, deception detection and touch.
I studied with Dr. Larry Barker for my Masters to specialize in nonverbal communication and I did Doctoral coursework in Nonverbal Communication in the same manner as my undergraduate degree, by seeking courses in other departments related to the field.
If someone wants a different kind of education please let them know I am taking on students for one on one coaching. I also take on student interns to work with me in my business.
Please let Dr. Ekman know I enjoy the television show and marvel at the accuracy of the nonverbal information. It is wonderful to have this show on the air for those of us who teach and have a passion for the field of nonverbal communication. If there is anything else you would like to know please feel free to call me.
The real origin of the handshake
Why do we shake hands with people? Well today on MSM front page ever day mysteries wrote today that the origin of the handshake ,"...lies in medieval history. By offering a right hand to a stranger, a hand that could otherwise be used to draw a sword, men were overtly displaying their intentions of peace toward one another. " But that is not accurate.The real origin of the handshake started not in medieval times but in Roman times. Romans clasped arms to show I hold not weapon. It was the medieval nights who made the shift from arm clasping to hand clasping and later to the shaking, but the shaking part of the handshake originated because of a trick of some medieval nights of hiding weapons up in their sleeve. So when Knights went to grab hands they started shaking the other guys hands so if there where any hidden weapons hidden in the sleeves of their potential opponent they would fall out during the "shake down.
At that point handshakes became weapons checks.
Nowadays, from signing a treaty to settling a bet with friends, "shaking on it" remains a symbolic sign of agreement.
For more about the handshake check out my book on my website. www.pattiwood.net
At that point handshakes became weapons checks.
Nowadays, from signing a treaty to settling a bet with friends, "shaking on it" remains a symbolic sign of agreement.
For more about the handshake check out my book on my website. www.pattiwood.net
Lie to Me
In preparing for my deception detection class tonight I thought I would watch a few minutes of the new television show called, "Lie to Me." The program is based on the research of Paul Ekman the leading authority on facial expression research. I have read all of his books and have been quoting his research since I began teaching body language at Florida State in the 80's. Durring the few minutes I watched the information on the facial expression that comes before someone is about to attack was accurate. I will be writing more about the show.
Obama's voice and body language read
I was going over my notes from the History Channel special I did this fall and came across my notes on Obama. Since I had so many of my audience members ask about him I thought I would cut and paste my notes. I am prepping for my deception detection class tonight so I am giving you these notes in their pure, make that not edited in anyway, form.
(i) Barack Obama How does he use his voice to project an impression? Rhythmical, very powerful, charismatic.
(ii) I just analyzed his voice as he did his victory speech at the Iowa Cacus back in January.
(iii) Barack Voice is naturally a deep full low baritone. Deep low voices are perceived, according to research, as more authoritative believable and trustworthy. Combine that with the ease at which he can speak loudly without any vocal strain and you can hear his voice coming from the TV in another room and feel its authority and power. Hilary voice as much as she tries to control it and make it lower is not naturally low and she strains it and sound screechy and angry when she attempts it.
(iv) Obama paralanguage is chameleon like he changes his voices so dramatically to suit his location his audience his topic that it is difficult to know no just what his real voice is but who is truly is.
(v) Listen how Obama cadence that rhythm that sounds like a Baptist preacher. Listen to how he speaks on beat and extends certain words the word saaaaaaaid this day would never come. Preachers have a special rhythmic speaking were there voice goes up and down like a song and pauses on a beat rhythmically like a drummers reptile paradiddle on a drum.( demonstrate) When he does this his speaking is musical and very pleasing to the ear. We listen and moved by the rhythm so much we may not even hear the words; in fact the words may mean nothing.( and he didn’t really say anything new in the speech) But his voice is hypnotic. We know when his voice goes up and he pauses we must cheer and say amen. You can’t help your self. His other preacher speaking aspect copies the I had a dream, Listen how to volume goes up and up and up stirring the crowd and then he pauses for effect. He very effetely uses He uses the power of the pause he will say something like. He waits till the audiences cheers till he moves on to the next sentence. Pausing makes the word before the pause and sometimes the entire sentence before the pause sound more powerful and important.
(vi) Barack Voice is naturally a deep full low baritone. Deep low voices are perceived, according to research, as more authoritative believable and trustworthy. Combine that with the ease at which he can speak loudly without any vocal strain and you can hear his voice coming from the TV in another room and feel its authority and power. Hilary voice as much as she tries to control it and make it lower is not naturally low and she strains it and sound screechy and angry when she attempts it.
(vii) Obama paralanguage is chameleon like he changes his voices so dramatically to suit his location his audience his topic that it is difficult to know no just what his real voice is who is truly is.
(viii) Listen how Obama cadence rhythm that sounds like a Baptist preacher. Listen to how he speaks on beat and extends certain words and he say ‘They saaaaaaaid this day would never come. Preachers have a special rhythm were there voice goes up and down like a song and pauses on a beat rhythmically drummers reptile paradiddle on a drum.( demonstrate) When he does this his speaking is musical and very pleasing to the ear. We listen and moved by the rhythm so much we may not even hear the words; in fact the words may mean nothing. The voice is hypnotic we just know when his voice goes up and he pauses we should cheer and say amen His other preacher speaking aspect copies the I had a dream, Listen how to volume goes up and up and up stirring the crowd and then he pauses for effect.
(ix) And listen for how he says particular words like said you small towns and churches Ameeerica, affooodablllee draws it out he puts on a slight southern more accent that slightly slurs the word. That makes him sound like one of the common folk. So even when we know he came from upper class family when he says, Callused hand by callused hand he sounds like he was with us working on the farm and ploughing the field.
(x) He very effetely uses He uses the power of the pause he will say waits till the audiences cheers till he moves on to the next sentence. Pausing makes the word before the pause and sometimes the entire sentence before the pause sound more powerful and important.
(i) Barack Obama How does he use his voice to project an impression? Rhythmical, very powerful, charismatic.
(ii) I just analyzed his voice as he did his victory speech at the Iowa Cacus back in January.
(iii) Barack Voice is naturally a deep full low baritone. Deep low voices are perceived, according to research, as more authoritative believable and trustworthy. Combine that with the ease at which he can speak loudly without any vocal strain and you can hear his voice coming from the TV in another room and feel its authority and power. Hilary voice as much as she tries to control it and make it lower is not naturally low and she strains it and sound screechy and angry when she attempts it.
(iv) Obama paralanguage is chameleon like he changes his voices so dramatically to suit his location his audience his topic that it is difficult to know no just what his real voice is but who is truly is.
(v) Listen how Obama cadence that rhythm that sounds like a Baptist preacher. Listen to how he speaks on beat and extends certain words the word saaaaaaaid this day would never come. Preachers have a special rhythmic speaking were there voice goes up and down like a song and pauses on a beat rhythmically like a drummers reptile paradiddle on a drum.( demonstrate) When he does this his speaking is musical and very pleasing to the ear. We listen and moved by the rhythm so much we may not even hear the words; in fact the words may mean nothing.( and he didn’t really say anything new in the speech) But his voice is hypnotic. We know when his voice goes up and he pauses we must cheer and say amen. You can’t help your self. His other preacher speaking aspect copies the I had a dream, Listen how to volume goes up and up and up stirring the crowd and then he pauses for effect. He very effetely uses He uses the power of the pause he will say something like. He waits till the audiences cheers till he moves on to the next sentence. Pausing makes the word before the pause and sometimes the entire sentence before the pause sound more powerful and important.
(vi) Barack Voice is naturally a deep full low baritone. Deep low voices are perceived, according to research, as more authoritative believable and trustworthy. Combine that with the ease at which he can speak loudly without any vocal strain and you can hear his voice coming from the TV in another room and feel its authority and power. Hilary voice as much as she tries to control it and make it lower is not naturally low and she strains it and sound screechy and angry when she attempts it.
(vii) Obama paralanguage is chameleon like he changes his voices so dramatically to suit his location his audience his topic that it is difficult to know no just what his real voice is who is truly is.
(viii) Listen how Obama cadence rhythm that sounds like a Baptist preacher. Listen to how he speaks on beat and extends certain words and he say ‘They saaaaaaaid this day would never come. Preachers have a special rhythm were there voice goes up and down like a song and pauses on a beat rhythmically drummers reptile paradiddle on a drum.( demonstrate) When he does this his speaking is musical and very pleasing to the ear. We listen and moved by the rhythm so much we may not even hear the words; in fact the words may mean nothing. The voice is hypnotic we just know when his voice goes up and he pauses we should cheer and say amen His other preacher speaking aspect copies the I had a dream, Listen how to volume goes up and up and up stirring the crowd and then he pauses for effect.
(ix) And listen for how he says particular words like said you small towns and churches Ameeerica, affooodablllee draws it out he puts on a slight southern more accent that slightly slurs the word. That makes him sound like one of the common folk. So even when we know he came from upper class family when he says, Callused hand by callused hand he sounds like he was with us working on the farm and ploughing the field.
(x) He very effetely uses He uses the power of the pause he will say waits till the audiences cheers till he moves on to the next sentence. Pausing makes the word before the pause and sometimes the entire sentence before the pause sound more powerful and important.
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