Some of you know I use to teach at a law enforcement training center and that I am particularly interested in what body language can make people open up. In grad school I wrote a paper on body language to increase self disclosure and I have been researching that process ever since.
Recently I have been corresponding with a police officer about some of his experiences Here is one of his stories that I thought was interesting.
"After hearing your handshake lesson and reading the article in your book, I started shaking every one's hand I was introduced to. I meet people all day long, but I used to shake hands only about 1/2 the time. I notice now that when you offer it first, usually there's a brief smile on the other end of it- almost like they do not expect a cop to be friendly- it works!"
"Now, when I shake a suspects hand, we have already made inroads into the rapport-building phase of interviewing him. I of course want a confession- or at least an admission from a bad guy to help me make my case...I clearly remember at least 3 times when I was on domestic calls and would not shake a guy's hand. The call would be all but over and we were literally leaving the scene. Me not shaking the dude's hand at the close of "business" would make him mad all over again. Hey it's a tactical consideration, but I wonder if I could have shaken more hands now."
I would love to know what you think. Do you think shaking hands can make people self disclose more? Do you have a story to share?
The 10 and 5 rule of body language and greeting behavior
How can body language change a business.
For years in my programs I have talked about greeting behavior and it's impact on first impressions.
In the Atlanta paper Sunday there was an article on customer service that mentioned a business that applies one of my greeting principals.
The Georgia World Congress Center, the fourth largest convention center in the country is working to improve it's customer service with specific directives. One of those directives they call the "10 and 5 foot rule." Workers are trained to make eye contact with a customer at 10 feel and acknowledge the person at 5 feet. How does this help. Well typically when we are walking and meet someone we make eye contact at 15 feet and do an eyebrow flash to show we are not going to harm them then if we are going to interact we stop at about 4 feet to greet (that's handshake distance) and shake hands. I suggest in customer service situations and sales situations that you actually smile and make eye contact and reach out your hand earlier at about 5 feet to let the other person know you want to stop to interact. In sales situations it always increases your chances of getting a good handshake in situations where prospects may try to avoid that contact. So the Congress Center knows that that the greeting can make strangers in their huge monilith building feell safer in the space by giving a extra freindly greeting. Yep, they have that body language thing down.
For years in my programs I have talked about greeting behavior and it's impact on first impressions.
In the Atlanta paper Sunday there was an article on customer service that mentioned a business that applies one of my greeting principals.
The Georgia World Congress Center, the fourth largest convention center in the country is working to improve it's customer service with specific directives. One of those directives they call the "10 and 5 foot rule." Workers are trained to make eye contact with a customer at 10 feel and acknowledge the person at 5 feet. How does this help. Well typically when we are walking and meet someone we make eye contact at 15 feet and do an eyebrow flash to show we are not going to harm them then if we are going to interact we stop at about 4 feet to greet (that's handshake distance) and shake hands. I suggest in customer service situations and sales situations that you actually smile and make eye contact and reach out your hand earlier at about 5 feet to let the other person know you want to stop to interact. In sales situations it always increases your chances of getting a good handshake in situations where prospects may try to avoid that contact. So the Congress Center knows that that the greeting can make strangers in their huge monilith building feell safer in the space by giving a extra freindly greeting. Yep, they have that body language thing down.
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