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Domestic Violence, Why Emotional Abuse May Be Harder To Heal From


I speak and write on recovering from Grief, Loss and Trauma. Physical abuse is usually far less treacherous than the psychological and emotional abuse. The worst part of victimhood is the dread, the fear of what can happen, the fear of what an abuser could do, That is really what’s at the core of understanding the stress of such a relationship. A victim of domestic violence lives in a heightened state of vigilance, tiptoeing around an abuser every minute of every day.



Patti Wood, MA - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com.
     

How a Cough or Clearing of the Throat May Indicate Deception

Someone can cough or clear their throat because they have a cold or allergy. But sometimes a scratchy throat is due to psychological irritation. Nerve endings, including those in the throat, can fire when we are stressed. Our central nervous system is alerted that something is not right.

Liars can cough or clear their throat subconsciously when they lie, and sometimes we subconsciously, cough or clear our throats when we hear someone else lie.The symbolism is powerful. We hear someone lie or we know about a lie or secret and the topic of the lie is being discussed and we want to say the truth but, it catches in our throat. Our central nervous is responding to the dissonance. We have the truth inside but, it is blocked from coming out.

In order to distinguish whether someone's cough, throat cleanse is a response to a speaker’s lie note the timing, in this case, Mulvaney was not coughing and suddenly started coughing when Trump was asked about his tax returns. Again, Mulvaney might have had a throat irritation but, typically that would be indicated by him coughing throughout the interview, in this case, it was an isolated cough time with a question about Trump's tax returns. 

“Trump had been asked a question about his tax returns when someone off camera – identified as Mulvaney – reportedly begins coughing.”



Patti Wood, MA - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com.
     

How to be Prepared for a Medical Emergency During Travel

How to be Prepared for a Medical Emergency During Travel
By Patti Wood

Twenty years ago, I got a kidney stone while traveling. I was very lucky, and I had my insurance information with me, and all was well, but after that experience, I realized the importance of being prepared. I have shared with anyone I know that travels to have their critical information listed under ICE on their phones and on a card in their wallet. This even prepared me years later when my boyfriend (at the time) who was a pilot had a stroke. I had helped him put ICE on his phone, so I knew he had all his doctors’ numbers and medications listed on it. When the EMT’s wouldn’t believe me when I said he was having a stroke and said they thought he was having a medication side effect issue I was able to call the pharmacy to make sure none of his medication was causing his severe headache so he could quickly get the stroke medication that helped save his life! The following is a great reminder of what you need to do right now to prepare for an emergency at any time.
Emergency Contact
Every smartphone has the “in case of emergency” (ICE) contact list. This is a list of contacts you select that can be accessed without unlocking your phone. If you are involved in an accident or taken ill, the ICE contact could provide critical information for paramedics.
Your ICE contact should know:
• Pertinent medical history and allergies.
• How to access a current list of your other medical information such as primary care physician, specialists, and medications.
• How to contact your immediate family and employer.
Choose your emergency contact strategically. It does not have to be a family member, but it should be someone who is aware of health concerns or any on-going medical issues. Here are a few tips for setting up the ICE list in your phone:
• Have more than one ICE contact in case, one is unavailable or one is traveling with you.
• Do not use choose two ICE contacts that could be traveling with you at the same time (i.e.: spouse and child).
• Include every method of communication you have for each ICE contact (cell phone, work phone, home phone, and email).
Medication and Allergies
Many prescription drugs have side effects that could land you in the hospital when mixed with certain foods, supplements, or antibiotics. To avoid making a medical situation worse, it is critical to know the types of medication you are taking. In addition to medication, you need to remember vitamins, nutritional supplements, and herbal products. Lastly, if you have any reactions or allergies to certain medication or something like latex, make a note on your medication list.
If you are traveling, more than likely you will not have the full-size medication bottles with you. Here are three ways to document your medications and allergies:
• Create a gallery in your phone and take a photo of each bottle to show the label including dosage and ingredients (if it has other ingredients).
• Create a contact in your phone called “medications” and list each medication and dosage in the notes section of the contact. Include this contact as an ICE*.
• Hand write a list of your medications with dosage information and place it in your wallet.
It is not necessary to expect your ICE contact to have this information memorized, but it is important that your ICE contact knows exactly where to find it. Make sure you share the location or provide them with a copy.
Insurance
Even with the best intentions, it is not a guarantee you will have your insurance card if you have a medical emergency during travel. Take a photo of your insurance card and make sure at least one of your ICE contacts has a copy of it. Alternatively, you could create a contact in your phone called ICE-Insurance and enter basic information into your phone.
Travel and Meetings Schedule
Your ICE contact needs to be aware of your travel and meeting schedule. This is especially important if you do not have an assistant or you are a solopreneur. Having once carried my phone on a gurney into an emergency room writhing in pain with a kidney stone so I could call my client if I had to have emergency surgery, I would not advise that as your best option!
If you are in the hospital, your client needs to know as soon as possible that you are not coming due to an emergency, and that you will reschedule when you are feeling better. If you are dealing with an emergency, you are not going to be able to make these calls, but someone will need to. Your health is your main priority, but you certainly do not want to have a “no call, no show” with someone who is a potential customer or who may have already paid you to be there.
• Make sure someone has access to, or knows how to gain access to, your calendar.
• Enter specific information on your calendar for appointments including meeting location, contact name, and phone number.
• Enter your travel itinerary onto your calendar including confirmation numbers. Services like TripIt make this easy.
After the important issues are hashed out, make sure your ICE contact or assistant calls your airline and cancels or reschedules your return flight. Do not expect the airline to refund your ticket if you are hospitalized, there are no laws requiring them to do so. If you have priority status, your airline may decide to waive your rebooking fee, but unless you are flying on Southwest you will likely have to pay a rebooking fee.
Start Planning
While we all hope to never actually need to use an emergency medical plan during a business trip, it is a good idea to have all the information in an easy to access location. Here is a simple checklist for you to use to create your emergency medical plan along with a one-page document to print. I followed the checklist and it took 20 minutes of my Sunday afternoon to complete. I will gladly trade 20 minutes of my Sunday afternoon now to prevent wasting precious time during an emergency medical situation trying to locate this important information.
*When using the ICE function on your phone you may be required to use a number for the contact to appear on your lock screen. You do not need an actual phone number; a single number will do.

Patti Wood, MA - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com.
     

Travel Tips, Tips From Patti Wood to Make Travel Easier, Less Stressful and Safer

I have been traveling as a professional speaker every week for a few decades. What do you do to make travel easier, less stressful and safer???
After years of trying every folding, rolling and tissue pack your cloths tip that didn’t work I pack each item of professional clothing on a hanger and in a separate dry-cleaning plastic bag and fold it into the suitcase. I never have to iron anything in a dry-cleaning bag.
I travel with protein bars, cashews, crackers, and fruit in case of delays in travel.
I carry a spare phone charger in my packed suitcase.
I use a noise-canceling headset to reduce my stress level.
I always have at least one paperback book with me to read. (typically three, because you never know when you will have to sit on the floor of the airport overnight, but I will be fine if I can hug my book nights)
I have multiple spares of everything I need to use my laptop.
I go through my check sheet list of items I need that’s taped on the inside of the suitcase before I zip up the suitcase.
In the car in the driveway, I do what I call the three key check and pull out and touch each item.
1. Do I have my house key?
2. Do I have any medication I might need?
3. Do I have my phone and charger?
When I go to get off a plane, I do my five alive check
1. phone
2. purse
3. noise canceling headset
4. suitcase
5. jacket/coat/sweater
What's on your list?


Patti Wood, MA - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com.
     

Song in Honor of My Dad - Morning Breaks


Years ago, shortly after my father died, I carried the groceries into the kitchen from the car and as my mother watched me, she broke down and started crying. I asked her what was the matter and she said, "The whole time we were married your dad did that for me" "We shopped on the military base and I never pushed a grocery cart or brought in a bag of groceries." I wrote the original draft of this song over a year ago in honor of my dad. I wasn't satisfied with it and shelved it, but the chorus haunted me, So on Memorial Day, when I was missing my dad, I tweaked it and wrote two new verses to see if it would work on my new album.
Morning Breaks
I take a deep breath in when people ask me how I am.
I nod and smile, say I’m fine, and ain’t the weather grand.
At the Piggly Wiggly I push the cart all by myself,
Can’t reach the can of peaches up on the top shelf.
At the corner store, I get nails to fix the fence.
I shore up what’s falling down, paint on pleasantness.
I sew new curtains for the windows, cut coupons, and make lists.
I dust and sweep and scrub away, a pretend perfectionist.
Chorus
And every day is a waiting game
Brave face for my brave guy
You’re doing your duty I know
But when morning breaks, so do I.
At night, when it gets dark, I turn the porch light on.
I cook dinner, eat just half, then I call your mom.
In bed, a romance novel is the only company I keep.
I can hold it, till I drift off, shut my eyes and sleep
And every day is a waiting game
Brave face for my brave guy
You’re doing your duty I know
But when morning breaks, so do I.
Bridge
I can keep it all together for you, in the perfect picture frame.
Till dawn comes, and you’re not here again
When Morning Breaks I cry, I cry, I cry!
When Morning breaks so do I




Patti Wood, MA - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com.