Patti was interviewed by the Toronto Sun on how to recover from a bad first impression. Read her tips below!
You Blew It! Now What?
How to Recover From
A Bad First Impression
JOANNE
RICHARD
Special to Postmedia Network
Your gut tells you that you messed up, but you don’t get
a
second chance at making a good first impression right?
Well,
possibly you do but you must go in prepared. A
recovery
mission to alter an initial perception requires
persistence.
According
to experts, if you’ve made a bad first
impression,
people then search for behaviors that
backup
their initial perception, and ignore information
that
conflicts with what they already believe. Beliefs stick
and
may limit opportunities in many areas of life.
Persistence
According to body language expert Patti
Wood,
(pattiwood.net) first impressions are
made within seconds
and it can take up to six months of
continuous face-to-
face interaction to change an incorrect
first impression.
First impressions are stubborn, social
psychologist Heidi
Grant Halvorson tells Business Insider. “And they can
Sometimes be way, way off.” If you’ve
stumbled, here’s how
to recover and make a great impression — the
second
time around!
Set a new intention, recommends
Set a new intention, recommends
Patti Wood, author of Snap: Making the Most
of First
Impressions, Body
Language and Charisma.
Think of the
new impression you want to send. Anchor
it with a specific
set of behaviors you will do at a
specific time.
“Let’s say you are seen as overly
critical in meetings so
at each meeting you set the intention:
I will give one piece
of praise by midway in each meeting and
smile and look
at the person or group as I say it,”
says Wood.
Provide the perceiver with abundant
evidence that they
are dead wrong about you, suggests
Grant Halvorson in
Business Insider.
Repeat your evidence behavior over and over.
Piling it on will need to go on for quite
Repeat your evidence behavior over and over.
Piling it on will need to go on for quite
some time. Adds Wood: “If you want to
change your
impression you will have to give your
better impression
over and over and again to build trust.
Don’t be discouraged.
Keep trying. Your consistent positive
behavior
will nurture a more accurate healthy
impression and long
lasting healthy relationships.”
Show a different, better side
Show a different, better side
of your personality to help reshape
perception, recommends
Wood. “If you come across as gruff,
turn and show
your sense of humor. If you come
across a cold, show your
warmth — perhaps by showing the way you
are a good listener
by leaning forward, paying attention. “If
you come across as critical,
show you are actually a positive person
who notices
good things by making a comment about a
great movie you
just saw or giving a concrete piece of
praise,” says Wood.
Interact in a different place.
“Research on first impressions
says they are more likely to change if
the person sees you
in a different environment,” says Wood,
so if the blunder
happened in a meeting room, stop and
chat in the hall or
break room. “If you interact every day
in the office, go out
with the office staff to lunch. Mix
your environments.”
Watch and listen to yourself. Wood says
to use your
phone to audio or video tape yourself
to see what it is
you are doing that sets a bad impression.
“Then watch the
tape and write out the behaviors or
have someone else
listen to or look at the tapes and give
you feedback.”
Check in at the start and end of
interactions.
Be aware of your first and lasts
The first thing and last thing you do in an interaction has the greatest
Be aware of your first and lasts
The first thing and last thing you do in an interaction has the greatest
impact on your impression, says Wood,
so be sure to take
note of what you’re doing and make
adjustments in your
behavior at those times.
Ask for a do-over
Consider
a do-over. If you really messed up and are
committed
to reversing that bad first impression, then
apologize
and start over. Be profuse and gracious with
your
apology, recommends Vicky Oliver, author of 301
Smart Answers to Tough Interview Questions. This
must be
done with integrity to work, adds Wood.
You must sincerely
wish to improve how you are. “A very
brave way to change
a bad first impression is to ask for a do-over then ask that
very person to tell you the
one small behavior you can change to
begin to heal and
change their impression of you.,” says
Wood.
joanne.richard@sunmedia.ca
“A very brave way to change a
bad first impression is to ask that very
person to tell you the one small
behavior you can change to begin
to heal and change their
impression of you.”
Patti Wood
Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com. Also check out Patti's YouTube channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.