Do You Know a
Stand-Up Guy or Stand-Up Gal?
Are You a Stand-Up Person for Someone?
My dad
was a Stand-Up Guy, and I didn’t know it. The other night I was talking to my
mom about love and she shared a story about my dad. Many of you know my
parents met and married seven days later. (Read that romantic story here)
Sitting
in the convertible on the beach under a full Miami moon, my dad proposed and my
mother turned him down. She gestured to her hearing aids, two large transistors
in the pockets of her dress and the chords going to her ears and said, “I can’t
hear well and you deserve to marry someone without a hearing problem.” My dad
responded, “That will never be a problem.” “We will take care of it.” And he
did. My mom said, in the many years that they were married and she still had
the hearing problem, he never once said, “You are not listening.” Or “You need
to pay attention.” In all those years he never in any way mentioned it or
demeaned her or made her feel less than.” Not once. She said, “He saw me
as a whole person, so I could see myself that way.” Now by this time I am
crying on the other end of the phone, because I didn’t know this about my dad
and my heart is just filling up. I fell in love with my dad again. I thought
about how much love they had. It would have been so easy for anyone to such a
disability as weakness against their partner.
My mom
goes on to share that my dad spent years researching her hearing problem and
after I was born finally found a doctor at the Mayo Clinic and my mother had
surgery, in fact eventually six surgeries which my father researched,
interviewed doctors about and arranged every other detail to make happen. My
dad was a Stand-Up Guy. Suddenly, so many things about the deep affection my
parents had for each other, how they always held hands, how she looked at him
with love, even though he was a tough man to love at times made sense. For me
this story was a revelation and it made me think about all the Stand-Up Guys
and Stand-Up Women I know. The people that do the right thing, the moral and good
thing, who give of themselves even for just a moment can heal, change and
inspire you. How they can help you stand up in life. My father died when I was
in college and my parents didn’t share this story with my sisters and I and I
am so glad my mom shared it.
I have
been asking friends and audience members to share stories of their stand up
friends, family colleagues and more. I have heard some beautiful, heart tugging
stories. Stories about doctors that serve patients in extraordinary ways,
stories about special moms and dads, of support through divorce, job loss,
illness and depression. I have heard stories about open hearted mentorship, and
even a story about a guy who talked on the phone to the wee hours so that a
friend who was struggling could fall asleep comforted with the phone against
her ear. What a great gift it is to know a Stand-Up Person.
I would
love to hear more stories of Stand-Up People, so please send them on. Write it
down, just a few words, or share it in voice to text or record it and then
please share it. I want to hear about these people in your life and what they
have meant to you. In my body language programs on deception detection and my
programs on leadership I share a method you can use to recognize if someone is
credible, if they are a person of integrity.
You can read the short version of the method here: http://www.pattiwood.net/article.asp?PageID=10452
Good
people make you feel good, and giving of yourself, being selfless, even for
moment, can give back to you and enlarge your heart. Ask someone today if they
have known or know a Stand-Up person and perhaps, pull your shoulders back a
little and bring your head high, open your heart and know the strength and love
inside you that always gives you the opportunity to Stand Up!
Patti Wood, MA - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com.
