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Dating Body Language Tips to Improve Your Listening Skills

Listen to Your Partner with your

 BODY LANGUAGE

Remember To Be Gentler

Patti Wood, MA, Professional Speaker expert in body language and nonverbal communication. Author of SNAP Making the Most of First Impressions Body Language and Charisma. www.pattiwood.net

What you can do to help focus and show that you are listening to your partner

Give Facial Feedback

Let your nonverbal expressions show your emotional response to the message. Matching and mirroring your partner creates similar chemicals in your body, increases empathy and understanding, and signals your partner that you "GET" what they are saying.

Eye Contact

A listener should give more eye contact than the speaker. Research suggests that if you want to have a good rapport, you should maintain eye-contact 60 to 70 percent of the time that someone speaks to you. Females are better at this than men and need more eye contact from listeners to feel comfortable in the conversation. Eye contact cues are more complicated for men. This may be because dominance is communicated by either staring or a lack of eye contact. It would help if you made good eye contact. Research shows that a typical business gaze focuses on the eyes and the upper forehead, and in a social gaze, the listener's gaze drops down to include the nose and the mouth.

Nod Your Head

You do not have to have a bobble toy head. Just occasionally nod your head to show you are listening and empathetic with the speaker's message. An added bonus of nodding your head is that it releases endorphin-like chemicals into your bloodstream to make you feel good and feel more affable about the speaker. Be aware that women nod their heads whether they agree with the speaker's message or not. Men may think that you agree with them if you nod too much, so be careful not as you use it as mere feedback. Don’t give men "I'm Listening" nods if you disagree with what a man is saying.

Turn Off Technology

We have become so accustomed to checking our phones while talking to someone we forget how rude it is. all those things are.  Signal to your partner your intent to really listen by turning away your laptop, turning off your cell phone, and even saying out loud, "Let me turn this off and put this away while we talk."

Lean Forward

Proximity, that is, being physically close, signals your desire to be emotionally or physiologically close. I don't mean get in their face but merely lean in toward your partner. Research shows that in a seated conversation, a backward lean communicates that you are dominant. A forward lean shows interest.

Expose Your Palms

We hide the palms of our hands when we are nervous or lying. Keep your hands open and visible to create comfort in others.

We all want to be seen heard and understood. There is no greater gift to give to someone than your interest. Be GENTLE with your listening.



Patti Wood, MA - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com.