What Your Sleep Position Says About You

Sleep On It: What Your Sleep Positions Say About You
For more information on Body Language Contact Patti@PattiWood.net

Nonverbal communication is more honest because it is under less conscious control, so what could be more revealing than the positions you assume in your sleep. The secret messages of your sleeping positions can reveal your true waking personality style. Here are the most popular sleep positions and what the research says it means.

The Spaghetti Noodle (lying on your side, stretched out)
According to British researcher Professor Chris Idzikowski (2003) fifteen percent of people sleep in this position. This is not the curled up or stiff limbed posture with arms at your sides, but rather one that is relaxed and stretched out. These people are calm, peaceful and steady. They are easy going and do what is expected of them. They want to be liked and part of the group. They are not driven or aggressive. Some research says people who sleep on their side with their right arm stretched over their head are said to be blessed with power and fortune.

The Fetal Position
Approximately 51 percent of women and 41 percent of all 1000 people surveyed sleep curled up on one si The Full- Fetal Position- The full-fetal is the characteristic womb position. Sleepers lie curled on their sides, with knees pulled all the way up, heads bent forward. Usually a pillow or blanket mass is centered at the stomach. These people are highly emotional, sensitive, artistic, and have intense one-on-one relationships. Oddly, it's found that women who sleep in this position normally have heightened capacity for multiple orgasms. de.
The symbolism is that of a baby in the womb. People who sleep in this position would have the innocence and unaffected personality of a child. If they are hugging a pillow they need a lot of love and support. They are sensitive and trusting. They tend to see the world as full of goodness as if they are wearing rose-colored glasses. They are friendly and social. They give support. They are the ones who bring the birthday card for everyone at the office to sign; a sense of community is important to them. They long for what they had in the womb: security, warmth and intimacy. They give joy to others. If the position is tightly curled up, it may show a slight degree of insecurity. A sudden change to this position could show stress and a need to return to the womb.

Semi Fetal- The most common position, the semi-fetal, has sleepers lying on their sides with knees slightly bent, one arm outstretched above the head, the other resting comfortably on the opposing upper arm to cradle the head. Conciliatory, compromising, non-threatening, non-shakers; sleep experts claim this to be the optimal sleep posture position.

The Yearner (side sleeper and reacher)
The same research shows this position is used by 13 percent of sleepers. People who sleep on their side with both arms out in front are said to have an open nature but can be suspicious and cynical. They are slow to make up their minds, but once they have made a decision, they are unlikely to ever change it.

The Crab (lying face down)
The sleeper is face down on the stomach with arms extended and bent, usually framed above the head this position has quite different meanings. I feel when a sleeper suddenly takes on this position it shows they are afraid of something. They may not want to face something or they are dealing with intense stress. Research says that sleepers who regularly sleep in the prone position tend to have strong compulsive tendencies and stubbornness in their personalities and are persistent and goal-oriented. The symbolism is of someone who refuses to see others’ viewpoints. They are serious and stubborn. They hold strong beliefs and try to have everything done their way and will use force to gain compliance. They are tense and focused in order to get things done. They do not give ground easily. If their hands are in fists, they could be showing hidden aggression. They are “my way or the highway” people.

The Soldier (on back and face up, arms at the side)
According to American researchers, 43 percent of the population sleep in this position. The nonverbal symbolism indicates that of someone facing life; you are secure and self assured. Professor Idzikowski’s British research says that only eight percent of the population use this position. I guess there are a lot more soldiers in the USA. The soldier position is held by lying on your back with both arms pinned to your sides. Professor Idzikowski says that people who sleep in this position are generally quiet and reserved. They don’t like a fuss, but set high standards for themselves others.

The Royal Position is the geometric opposite of the prone. The royal sleeper lies supine, fully on the back, with arms slightly akimbo at the sides. It's an open, vulnerable and expansive position, and these people display self-confidence and self-involvement. Workaholic businessmen and entrepreneurs often prefer this position.

The Star (on back, face up with the legs open and arms spread wide)
You are a star and freedom loving. You are comfortable taking over the space. This is the sleep position of an extremely confident person. You are not only assured, you are open to the world. You’re ready to hug the world. Sleeping in this position shows you have a sense of well-being. You’re confident and optimistic and not particular keen on planning or scheming, but you can be surprised by scheming of others.

Starfish (on back with both arms up around the pillow)
British research says that these sleepers make up five percent of the population, make good friends because they are always ready to listen to them, and offer help when needed. They generally do not like to be the center of attention. I disagree and give a specific assessment based on the position of the hands on top and I call it The Crown.

The Crown (hands are on top of the head or arms are crossed to support the head)
They are putting a crown on their heads because they think they are kings. They listen so they can be the wise sage and then tell people what to do. They think they are supportive and merely giving helpful advice. The crowned sleeper is highly intelligent and enthusiastic but some of their ideas are only good to them.

The Twister (tied up in knots)
People who sleep all tied up in knots (twisted) or with limbs flung out all over the bed are experiencing stress. They are under constant pressure. It is difficult to always feel that life is a struggle and these people often feel that they are falling short. The tension will eventually wear them down, hopefully leading to a new approach to life that is less stressful.


Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional
The Body Language Expert
Phone-404-315-7397
Web- http://www.PattiWood.net
Blog- http://www.bodylanguagelady.blogspot.com
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Controversial CoSleeping as Seen in the Movie "Away We Go."

I just got a request from a journalist who wanted to interview me about Cosleeping, that is sleeping with the child or children in the parents' bed. Obviously this is a controversial topic. In fact, there was a very funny scene in the new independent film "Away We Go". The scene made CoSleeping seem like a crazy sixties hippie-like thing to do. When I discuss couples' sleep positions (Just type in couples sleep positions in my search to find those insights) I point out the importance of the couples connecting with each other during sleep. The research on Cosleeping--also called family bed sleeping--shows quite a long list of benefits for the child. Babies who Cosleep have less stress and more self confidence and parents create a deeper bond and sense of understanding with their children.(See below for more benefits as well as warnings.) I have spent years researching touch and body language. There are so many things healthy touch can do. It is an amazing thing. For all the health and psychological benefits of touch you can read the chapter in my body language book or check out my website. I have friends and relatives who practiced Cosleeping with their children and they are now the most confident, happy kids I have ever seen. There is research on how wonderful it is for the baby to Cosleep, but there are dangers for babies as well. I like the idea of the family cuddling together in a big family bed, and then, for safety, moving small babies to a separate bed to sleep. Of course no matter the choice the parents make they have to make sure they get a good nights sleep! Personally, when I was a baby and growing up my family slept in their own beds, but on Sunday mornings my sisters and I would all run in and jump on our parents' bed. We would cuddle as we talked, laughed and read the funnies. It made me feel connected to my family and also let me see my parents as a couple side by side. All very wonderful and healthy ways to spend time as a family.

Below is information on Co-Sleeping provided by Wikipedia.

Stress hormones are lower in mothers and babies who co-sleep, specifically the balance of the stress hormone cortisol, the control of which is essential for a baby's healthy growth.[11][12][13][14]

In studies with animals, infants who stayed close to their mothers had higher levels of growth hormones and enzymes necessary for brain and heart growth.[15][16]

The physiology of co-sleeping babies is more stable, including more stable temperatures, more regular heart rhythms, and fewer long pauses in breathing than babies who sleep alone.[17][18]

Co-sleeping may promote long-term emotional health. In long-term follow-up studies of infants who slept with their parents and those who slept alone, the children who co-slept were happier, less anxious, had higher self-esteem, were less likely to be afraid of sleep, had fewer behavioral problems, tended to be more comfortable with intimacy, and were generally more independent as adults.[19][20][21][22] However, a recent study (see below under dangers) found different results if co-sleeping was initiated only after nighttime awakenings.

Co-sleeping is known to be dangerous for any child when a parent smokes, but there are other risk factors as well.[5] Some common advice given is to keep a baby on its back, not its stomach, that a child should never sleep with a parent who smokes, is taking drugs (including alcohol) that impede alertness, or is obese.[23] It is also recommended that the bed should be firm, and should not be a water bed or couch; and that heavy quilts, comforters, and pillows should not be used. Young children should never sleep next to babies under nine months of age.[24] It is often recommended that a baby should never be left unattended in an adult bed even if the bed surface itself is no more dangerous than a crib surface.

Job Interviewing Tips

My intern Julie interviewed me recently about body language tips for job interviews. She will be posting our interview on the blog and website soon. I just wanted to add some tips that are important in interviewing that are not directly related to nonverbal communication.

Let go of performance anxiety - Let go of the stressful thought, “Will I be good enough in the interview?” The interview is really about filling a job. They are looking for a match of characteristics and qualifications. It about a match rather than about you being good enough. And sometimes it is about the personality of the interviewer. Many interviewers are looking for someone like them. Some matching and mirroring of the interviewer could get you a job offer, but then you need decide if you like the energy of your new this person, who may be your future boss.

Be Polite - The smallest thing you do and say that shows your caring and courtesy has an impact. From holding the door for the interviewer, waiting for them to take a seat first if they don’t ask you to sit first, thanking them for taking the time to speak with you at the beginning and again at the end of the interview, to thanking them for offering you a beverage--your ease and proper etiquette shows so much.

Show you came prepared- Bring a nice leather bound notebook with a pad and pen clipped inside. The pocket should have copies of your resume and the printed research you did on the company and the job. You can even pull out the research you did on the company and ask the interviewer a question you have prepared based on your research.

In my presentation skills course and my How to Give a Great Interview course I talk about the power of words. I suggest you don’t use soft words like hopefully, if I get the job, and instead use words that show your confidence. "When I get the job..."

When you leave the interview, at your first opportunity write down your impression of what you did and any questions you might need to go over should you have another interview. Also write down things you did well and pat yourself on the back. Completing a job interview is like climbing a mountain. Sit back a moment and congratulate yourself and enjoy the view.
For information of public seminars Patti is giving on body language and deception detection in Philadelphia in the summer of 09 though Paliani consulting please contact us or go directly to the Paliani site. You can always contact Patti at Patti@PattiWood.net

Reading Body Language Can Make You a Better Listener

This is a direct quote from a recent participant in my body language seminar.

"Patti, I attended you public seminar in Philadelphia. I found that out of all the benefits of attending your body language program, the biggest was becoming a better listener. Yes, learning to read others body language has actually made me a better listener. I know that sounds strange, but I would often have a lot of “mental noise” that kept me from truly listening to someone. When I would be in a sales meeting the other person (prospect) would be talking and I would be thinking about my answers or what I wanted to say next, etc. Now that I know body language I am not just listening to the words, I am watching my clients. This has helped me eliminate all my mental noise and allowed me to focus, listen and engage much more effectively."

Attractiveness, skinny, funny

I have been blogging about our love of skinny woman and horrible prejudice against those who are overweight. You may not know that I am constantly working on my weight and I got this joke from speaker Nigel Risner today.

"Inside me there's a thin person struggling to get out, but I can usually sedate him with four or five cupcakes." -Bob Thaves

In my case it would two or three Dove bars.