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What Science Says Makes You Sexy, 5 things that can make you look sexy and irresistable.

Here is a great article on “The science of sexy: 5  things that can make you irresistible.”
I always new as a women that I think funny men are very sexy. And that laughing at a mans jokes can make a women appear more sexy. Here are other attributes that make someone sexy.
The article is below here is the link to it on THE WEEK’S site.  http://theweek.com/article/index/262300/the-science-of-sexy-6-things-that-can-make-you-irresistible
From my favorite magazine called THE WEEK
Establish that you're hard to get in general — but very enthusiastic about the person you're with
By Eric Barker, Barking Up the Wrong Tree | June 10, 2014

If, unlike JT, you didn't bring sexy back, follow the rules below. (Pascal Le Segretain/Getty Images)

1. Humor is sexy
Humor is attractive to men and women — but not in the same way. The research shows women like men who make them laugh, and men like women who laugh at their jokes.
Recent research suggests that while both men and women say they like a "good sense of humor" in a potential mate, they differ in what they mean by this phrase. Women tend to prefer men who make them laugh, whereas men tend to prefer women who laugh at their jokes.
Consistent with this, Robert Provine analyzed more than 3000 singles ads and found that women were more likely to describe their good humor appreciation ability whereas men were more likely to offer good humor production ability.

 Why is humor sexy? Funny people are smart, and smart is sexy.
Gil Greengross and Geoffrey Miller found in a sample of 400 university students that general intelligence and verbal intelligence both predicted humor production ability (writing captions for cartoons), which in turn predicted lifetime number of sexual partners (a proxy of reproductive success). They found, however, that males showed higher average levels of humor production ability, which is consistent with the sexual selection perspective. From these results, Greengross argues that a sense of humor evolved at least partly through sexual selection as an intelligence indicator.

So ladies can boost their attractiveness by chuckling a bit more.
And guys, you can garner more attention by learning how to make women laugh.
Men in the "humor" condition received phone numbers from 42.9 percent of the female participants and were refused 57.1 percent of the time. In comparison, men in the "no humor" condition were refused 84.6 percent of the time and were only accepted 15.4 percent of the time. In other words, men who were observed as the humor producers of the group were nearly three times as likely to receive a phone number than those who were observed as laughing at a friend's joke instead.

2. Being liked is sexy
Want to increase someone's interest in you? Might be worthwhile to make sure they find out you're interested in them.
Dr. Aron affirmed that the subjects' expectation that the other person was going to like them had a huge effect. "If you ask people about their experience of falling in love, over 90 percent will say that a major factor was discovering that the other person liked them," according to Dr. Aron.

This idea is affirmed by studying the effectiveness of "playing hard to get." What's the best way to play that game?
Establish that you're hard to get in general — but very enthusiastic about the person you're with.
As a result of the interviews, the researchers speculated that the best strategy would be to give a potential date the impression that in general you were hard to get (and therefore a scarce resource worth having) but really enthusiastic about him or her specifically. They tested this notion by using some of the same techniques… and found overwhelming evidence to support their hypothesis.

3. What you talk about is sexy
Random conversation with someone you're interested in can be a bad idea. Why? What you talk about can matter — a lot.
Emotional, personal information exchange promotes powerful feelings of connection.
Arthur Aron, a psychologist at the State University of New York at Stony Brook, is interested in how people form romantic relationships, and he's come up with an ingenious way of taking men and women who have never met before and making them feel close to one another. Given that he has just an hour or so to create the intimacy levels that typically take weeks, months, or years to form, he accelerated the getting-to-know-you process through a set of thirty-six questions crafted to take the participants rapidly from level one in McAdams's system to level two.

How effective is it? In under an hour it can create a connection stronger than a lifelong friendship.
What he found was striking. The intensity of the dialogue partners' bond at the end of the forty-five-minute vulnerability interaction was rated as closer than the closest relationship in the lives of 30 percent of similar students. In other words, the instant connections were more powerful than many long-term, even lifelong relationships.
That said, don't get so nervous about your words that you can't speak…
When a woman is very attracted to a man, whether his pickup line is good or not doesn't matter at all.
When women are looking for a short-term fling, however, it may be a different story. One study conducted on college students found that women favored men for a short-term fling if they found the men attractive regardless of the content of their pickup lines.

4. Personality is sexy
Conscientiousness is predictive of a number of very important positive elements in life.
Agreeable, conscientious people make better spouses and parents — but disagreeable, non-conscientious people have more sex partners. The former invest in quality, and it seems like the latter make up the difference in, well, volume.
Looking to settle down? Check if that person has their ducks in a row, is organized, and easy to get along with. That's marriage material.
Nettle and Clegg reported that in a sample of 545 people, men (but not women) with low levels of agreeableness and conscientiousness tended to have a higher number of sexual partners. It has also been found cross-culturally, across 10 world regions, that low levels of agreeableness and conscientiousness are related to higher levels of sexual promiscuity and relationship infidelity, so there may be reproductive benefits to those on the low end of these traits.

5. How they make you feel is sexy
Research shows we don't really fall in love with a person — we fall in love with how we feel when we're with them.
This is best demonstrated by the concept of emotional contagion: We're bad at telling what made us feel a certain way, but good about making associations.
Feeling excited, stimulated, and aroused is often associated with the people around us, even if they're not the cause.
This can be taken to extremes: having someone try to kill you can actually make you more attracted to them.
Those in the high-fear condition did show, for example, significantly more desire to kiss my confederate (one of the key questions) and wrote more romantic and sexual content into their stories. Looking at the details of these results, I found that the situation had generated, quite specifically, romantic attraction.

You might find the notion that we're just "feeling junkies" un-romantic, but this idea can save relationships and prevent divorce.
…if partners experience excitement from other sources (such as novel and challenging activities) in a shared context, this shared experience can reignite relationship passion by associating the excitement with the relationship. ["Marital Boredom Now Predicts Less Satisfaction 9 Years Later" from Psychological Science, Vol. 20, #5]

http://bodylanguagelady.blogspot.com/2014/05/men-find-women-more-attractive-with.html
http://bodylanguagelady.blogspot.com/2014/02/the-research-shows-anti-redhead.html
http://bodylanguagelady.blogspot.com/2010/09/attraction-tips-smiling-and-eye-contact.html


Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com. Also check out Patti's YouTube channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.

Apps: Has Disruptive Tech Gone Too Far?






Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com. Also check out Patti's YouTube channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.

Sofia & Joe are Stuck Like Glue



After three months together, Sofia Vergara and Joe Manganiello are not much for giving each other space.  During a July stroll, Patti says she likes the way that Sofia gently hangs onto Joe's hand.  His arm around her, while his left hand is in his pocket, is such an alpha male gesture.  In August, their roles were reversed during a shopping trip in Malibu.  Sofia is like a child with a brand-new toy.  She is grabbing Joe like she is saying, "He's mine!"

July photo gets a 4 on the Life & Style True Love Rating Scale

August photo gets a 3 on the Life & Style True Love Rating Scale.

Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com. Also check out Patti's YouTube channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.

People Don't Like Anything (or Anyone) Moving Toward Them


People Don't Like Anything
(Or Anyone)
Moving Toward Them

There is a new study discussed in the October Harvard Business Review that says people don't like anything or anyone moving towards them. The research the interview is based on is called Approach Aversion: Hedonic Reactions Toward Approaching Stimuli. 
The third research study method had a video tape of a man walking toward the subjects 
viewing the tape, walking backward away from them and walking in place. The researchers found complex results but, in the discussion in the Harvard review they recommend that speakers not step forward towards their audiences when they speak as the subjects in the original study had an approach aversion result. Though the subjects in the study viewed the man approaching them on tape negatively no matter how he approached I wonder if because it was a video tape rather than a live person who could establish rapport? I think there is another way to look at it as well.
As a body language expert and presentation skills trainer I strongly recommend moving toward the audience to break through the "stranger barrier" and establish rapport with the audience and to indicate that the you are the one in charge and have power.  So there may be another benefit that goes along with the advance aversion finding. You can briefly shock your audience by moving towards them and thus capture their attention.   I am a short blond women so I know moving into the audience is a significant advantage for me as a professional speaker.
The research study had the man on the tape use different facial expressions. In on his facial expressions where neutral, another he was somewhat frowning and in the positive he was somewhat smiling. There are gender based differences in many aspects of persevered power and perceived fear. I do believe that men need to be more careful about moving toward their audiences to start their speeches. They should give what I call "softening signals" first such as smiles, as in the studies, but be very careful what kind of smiles. Having done research on smiling for many years a small change can make an enormous difference in the perception and emotional response. You may want to look at my blog posts on smiling to see what a true full face smile looks like and practice smiling all the way to eyes so you have the little pockets under your eyes and the small lines radiating outward as well as a relaxed lips smile. The smile is helpful to make your approach be less threatening, but I advise you also open  up the front of the body, showing the palms of their hands, raising the eye brows in an eyebrow flash and perhaps if they are tall or otherwise imposing, tilting their head to the side very briefly before or as they move forward. You might also make sure your opening is positive and warmly given so your voice (para language) agrees with the warm opening. 







Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com. Also check out Patti's YouTube channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.

How To Stay Positive

I love this funny little video. It is so hysterical. This little girl knows how to get her day started right. My new morning ritual is to start the day like she does!  

https://www.facebook.com/video.php?v=393561765678


Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com. Also check out Patti's YouTube channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.