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Does a Narcissist Want You to Chase Them?


They like pursuing and being pursued

They like both pursuing and being pursued; ultimately, they want to control. Narc’s feel good when they control the happiness of others. They get Narcissistic supply from controlling their target’s happiness.

If the victim pursues them, the Narc can control the flow of joy by being out of reach and unattainable, just out of reach, seemingly won, and then out of reach again, in a continuing cycle.

They can get a supply hit from seeing their target’s efforts to pursue. When they appear “gotten,” they can get a hit of supply from knowing that it is all a ruse, a game, and then they can get a bit hit supply from dropping the victim, disconnecting, ghosting, and then another by reappearing.




https://upjourney.com/does-a-narcissist-want-you-to-chase-them
Patti Wood, MA - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com.
     

Megan Fox & MGK's Proposal Body Language by Body Language Expert Patti Wood,



Get out your celebratory blood vials, everyone! Megan Fox and Machine Gun Kelly are officially engaged. On Jan. 11, MGK proposed to Megan during a vacation in Puerto Rico. The musician popped the question under a banyan tree that already held significance in their relationship — apparently, back in July 2020, they sat below the same tree and “ask[ed] for magic.” (Would you expect anything less from them?) Their romantic wish came true, and Megan and MGK’s proposal body language is exactly what you’d expect from the couple: dramatic (if curated) and full of excitement.


body language expert and author of SNAP: Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language, and Charisma, Patti Wood explains to Elite Daily that the proposal looks “staged.” Filmed from multiple angles, the engagement video looks like a movie clip of some sort of ritual sacrifice. “They’re at an apex as if it was a sanctuary. Their intention here is to show that it was a holy act,” Wood guesses.

And that intention continues to seep through the rest of the video. “There’s a silence to it,” Wood also notes. Despite the fact that we can clearly see MGK and Megan talking to one another in the clip, all you can hear is the sounds of nature and birds chirping. Wood says, “They want to elevate it and make it more sacred. It’s definitely curated and produced.”


After MGK kneels, Megan immediately covers her mouth with her hands — it’s an obvious sign of surprise, but it looks exaggerated in the moment, per Wood. “It seems a little over-acted,” she says. Within the next few seconds, however, you see a more genuine side of their relationship.

In the video, Megan sways slightly back and forth with looking at her beau. “It’s a spontaneous, sincere, rocking motion. She’s truly nervous and excited,” says Wood. The back-and-forth rocking reminds her of a child seeing a birthday gift, eagerly waiting to get their hands on it.

Megan’s anticipation is clear, but MGK has a much more zen vibe going on. “He seems fairly calm,” Wood adds. To be fair, he had more time to adjust to the idea of engagement — custom engagement rings take some time, after all!

When Megan processes what’s happening, she quickly joins MGK on the ground, kneeling with him. “It’s unusual,” per Wood. Usually, people either stay standing or bend over to reach their partner during the proposal.


They aren’t just literally on the same level, either. Her joining him on the ground hints at a strong connection between the two of them (surprising literally no one). “Coming down to his level shows a desire to be closer to him and equanimity in feelings,” Wood says.

That’s not all. Wood also notices how Megan “presses down on the top of her head” as MGK speaks to her as if she’s trying to physically “keep herself together” — or stop the excitement from literally bursting out. At the same moment, MGK nods at her. “[The nod indicates that] he feels the same about this,” Wood says. AKA, they’re both feeling a little overwhelmed by how excited they are.

t’s what I call a ‘look pretty’ kiss,” Wood says of Megan and MGK’s post-proposal smooch. There isn’t a lot of heat or discernible passion. And although the whole scene has sensual overtones, per Wood, the kiss is slightly lackluster. (Believe me, I’m as shocked as you are.)

“They’re not pressing toward each other,” Wood adds, pointing to the way the couple keeps space between them even when they are kissing. “There’s no energy or pulling each other closer, which usually indicates passion.” (A little refresher: This is the same couple that has “the kind of sex that would make Lucifer clutch his rosary,” according to Megan herself.)

Here’s hoping we get to see the professional photos — or drone footage — from this proposal soon! Three camera angles are just not enough!

They’re Feeling Overwhelmed



Patti Wood, MA - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com.
     

Techniques to Deal with a Celebrity Death

I am an expert in body language, and I speak on dealing with grief loss and trauma.

I remember the Day John Denver died I had an overwhelming urge to call my childhood friend Robin Wilkinson and share my grief with her. So I called her and we did, one of the best things you can do to deal with a celebrity death that affects you, we told each other stories about John and his music. We had so many memories! Times we had enjoyed listening to his songs together. Times we sang his songs in the car on the way to football games. Years that our friends at church gathered in a big circle and played Denver's songs on our guitars. I thanked Robin for giving me a John Denver album for a birthday present when I was recovering from getting my tonsils out. And she remembered I had played that album with her and cheered up immediately. It helped.

Here are 7 Techniques to Deal with a Celebrity Death that affects you. By Patti Wood. 

  1. Find some of their "artistry" to relive and enjoy the pleasure of what made them special. Play their music, watch videos of their interviews, find their stand-up routines. Watch your favorite movie.
  1. Share Stories about what you loved most about their talent and memories you have of enjoying them. Reach out to people in your life that you share memories attached to the celebrity's artistry. Sharing positive stories about someone softens your grief and honors them.
  1. Write down in your journal or online in social media a positive memory or even more than one positive memory of their artistry. Writing is a great form of healing. It gets thoughts out of your body and releases them to the universe.
  1. Be ok with your grief. It is ok to be sad. And even be sad and you think about different times in your life that have passed.
  1. Reach out to that artist's community to share your condolences and memories.
  1. If you're an artist of any kind, create some form of art to honor them. Paint a picture, write a song, a joke. 
  1. If you want to move out of sadness, move your body. Do something to give yourself a physical release. Grief operates in the right hemisphere, the limbic brain so you can shift out of grief by moving. Take a brisk walk, turn on some music and sing or dance. Go hear live music. Get in the car and take a meandering drive somewhere pretty. Take a shower. You can breathe in slowly and deeply. Play with your pet. Bounce a ball.
 

 

 




Patti Wood, MA - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com.
     

The Five Steps to Deal with Negative Self-Talk and Conflict By Body Language Expert Patti Wood

 The Five Steps to Deal with Negative Self-Talk By Patti Wood

1. Tune in to your body.
2. Breathe and send yourself love
3. Use self-talk to see things differently.
4. Consider and choose the best behavior options.
5. Congratulate yourself.


Step 1. Tune in to your body.


When you're critical of yourself, you tune into the critical thinking brain in your neocortex. You want to release the critic, turn it off, and move to your emotional brain, where body language and feeling are processed. The first step is to be inside your body. Be aware of how criticism may negatively affect your body, then shift or change that aspect of your body language. Next, you want to be mindful of the physical signs of tension, so you can release them before they develop any further. Body signals indicate increasing negativity. Here’s what to do if you notice them: 

·        Tensing of muscles — move and let go and relax your body from the feet up.

·        Lowering your head — bring your head up. Let it lift as if a balloon holds it.

·        Your hands, arms, and legs are pulling in to make yourself smaller — bring your limbs out. Spread your feet apart. Get big.

·        A change in your breathing (perhaps your breath is shallower) — breathe deep.

·        A change in voice tone or volume. Notice if you are frozen in place or perhaps not talking at all or lowering the volume or the strength of your voice — shout or sing or yell out something positive.

 

Step 2. Take note of the message that you are sending yourself.

 

Realize you are in control. Say to yourself, "I am feeling negative about ____   right now. I choose not to let it get bigger, or I choose to let that thought go. Or I choose to change that thought. For example, imagine you have had a bad interaction and find yourself dwelling on a thought such as I let that coworker raise his voice and say horrible things to me. I'm not strong. You can say to yourself, "I chose not to say anything this time, but I will be prepared the next time someone treats me badly. I can say, ‘Please treat me with respect or I can ask for an apology. I might say to myself, "That coworker is not emotionally healthy, and I chose a safe non-engaging response to deal with them. Now I will let that interaction go so that unhealthy person does not take any more of my headspace and cause me any tension or stress.”
 

Step 3. Switch your negative message to positive self-talk to see things differently.

Learn to use a different kind of self-talk. The exact same situation will produce different emotions if you change your interpretation

Write out your negative message, then flip it and write the opposite positive message.
Write anything that you like about yourself and are proud of.

Examples:

·        Hey, I can deal with this.

·        I'm a creative person, and I may be stuck at this moment, but this moment will pass, and I will be in flow again.

·        I can stop this task for now and shift to something that brings me pleasure and confidence.

·        True, things aren't going how I planned, but being negative won't help.  What can I do right now to shift my thinking? How can I still get something good/fun out of this experience?


Step 4. Consider and choose the best behavior options.


Do something to give yourself a physical release. Again, critical talk comes from the left hemisphere, so do things that activate your right brain. Take a brisk walk, turn on some music, and sing or dance. Hear live music. Get in the car and take a meandering drive somewhere pretty. Take a shower. Breathe in slowly and deeply. Play with your pet. You can imagine you are at the beach or in a meadow or looking at a stream or mountain. Bounce a ball.


Step 5. Congratulate Yourself


Focus on any improvement of your abilities. One step at a time is okay and congratulate yourself. 

·        Hey, I did that well. I am really proud of myself! YES!

  

Interviewed several times a week by national media outlets for her expertise in nonverbal communication, Patti Wood is an Atlanta-based consultant, speaker, and author. And speaks to Fortune 500 companies and  associations on communication, including 

 

Patti Wood, MA - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com.

     

How to Give Compliments and Praise and Show Gratitude for Good Behavior. ERASER METHOD Praise and Compliments

As a body language expert, in my speaking and coaching, I realized that people often notice bad behaviors in others and are critical, but people don't always notice the good behaviors of others and show them their gratitude for doing something good.

I use the Sunrise Manifesto Gratitude Journal in my coaching, It has a daily request to write about someone you are grateful for.

I tell my clients to write out their gratitude, using my Exact and Aware Gratitude Tool and, when appropriate, share their gratitude with the actual person. I find that very quickly my clients focus more on positive behaviors. They also share with me that it creates uplifting conversations and interactions very quickly.

                                                   Gratitude And Praise Tool 

Noticing and being grateful for people's
nonverbal behaviors.  

Exact    With exact terms, state the person's behavior as it exists now.  Answer the following questions in your statement.  When did it happen? Where did it happen? Who was involved? How often has it happened? Be specific. Make it real and concrete. Don't use generalizations such as alwaysneverevery time.  

 Example:    Three times in the past three weeks, you've called me just to chat.

 Example:    In the last week, you've come through the door and immediately kissed me.

 Example:   I noticed as I stood in line how you made eye contact and smiled and chatted so warmly with the customers before me.     

     

Aware       Make the person aware of the emotion(s) the behavior arouses in you.  How do you feel in

response to their behavior?


Example:  When you call just to chat it makes me feel connected to you, and we end up talking about good things and bad things and laughing and that feels wonderful. Thank you. I am grateful for your friendship.

Example:  I love being first! And when you kiss me I feel like you are happy to see me and you desire me. Thank you, I am grateful for our marriage.                    

Example:  It made me so happy to see your warmth and kindness. Thank you. I am grateful for your happiness. 


Patti Wood, MA - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at www.PattiWood.net. Check out Patti's website for her new book "SNAP, Making the Most of First Impressions, Body Language and Charisma" at www.snapfirstimpressions.com.