Patti Wood Body Language Expert Blog : 09/01/2010

The Way You Pucker Up Reveals A Lot About Your Relationship

From a perfunctory peck to a passionate embrace, the way you and your man pucker up reveals a lot about your relationship. And it's not just the lip action that counts - how you hold onto your honey also tells a secret or two about your bond, says Atlanta -based body language expert, Patti Wood. She has analyzed a few star smooches for First For Women to figure out the true feelings behind their camera kisses. To get a reading on your relationship, grab a photo of you and your man locking lips and match it to one of the kissing couples. Next, go to the link to find out what Patti reveals about the smooch!

http://www.scribd.com/doc/38188729/FirstForWomenThe-SecretBehindTheSmooch

Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at http://pattiwood.net/. Also check out the body language quiz on her YouTube Channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.

Facial Expressions Tell The Story

Chucky may look "happy and confident" in the first pic at the left according to Patti Wood, body language expert and author of People Savvy, but she goes on to tell ESPN that the feeling didn't last. Patti analyzes Gruden's facial expressions on the day Tampa was eliminated from playoff contention. Check out what's revealed in pics 1 - 5 at the link below!

http://www.scribd.com/doc/38188681/ESPNGettingAFacial

How Do You Get Someone to Be Honest and Not Lie to You?

The Law of Honest Feedback

Make requests throughout your delivery and ask for agreement with each point and sub point.

Getting honest feedback is inherently difficult. The next few posts will give you different methods to get honest feedback. The following techniques and exercises are in my book and in my workshops.

The Law of Honest Feedback-

Make requests throughout your delivery and ask for agreement with each point and sub point

“It sounds good to me.” “How does it sound to you?”

“It seems reasonable to me.” “How does it seem to you?”

“It feels like a good choice to me.” “How it feels to you?”

Be ready to seem surprised, but not upset if they do not agree. Also, make sure you listen to their doubts carefully without interruption

Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at http://PattiWood.net. Also check out the body language quiz on her YouTube Channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.

Bishop Eddie Long's Body Language after Sexual Molestation Allegations

More on my interview on CNN reading Bishop Eddie Long's body language,

Bishop Eddie Long's Body Language in his sermon after Sexual Molestation Allegations

When you are doing a body language analysis of someone suspected of wrong doing you go through a multistage process. One of the first steps is to compare the person's behavior with a baseline of what a normal innocent person's body language would be in the circumstances. You also take into consideration what the normal behavior would be for a power person (celebrity, politician, sports figure or in this case popular minister of a large congregations' behavior would be in these circumstances. Innocent people who are accused and the in the grip of media attention want to speak, they want to speak about their innocence, they want to speak as soon as possible and they want to speak continually until they know you believe in their innocence. Even if Bishop long was advised by his lawyers to "..not try the case in the media." I believe if he was totally and completely innocent of the molestation charges he would have said he was innocent of those charges. Instead he used the confusing phrase that, "I am not the man portrayed in the media.' Even someone guilty of the charges, could believe he was not a "bad" guy. Believing yourself to be "portrayed" differently than you see yourself is not the same thing as not having committed a crime. Recently, I watched a murderer's testimony of killing two of his ex girlfriends. He said, "I am not a bad guy." "I was angry." "I regret the killing ----(the second) girlfriend." "I wished I hadn't done that." He regretted killing the second girlfriend, because that led to his arrest! . But he believed himself to be a good guy.

In the Bishop Long sermon he also nodded his head counter to his statements several times a clear cue of deceit, he also did tongue thrusts of passive aggressiveness. More later. Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at http://PattiWood.net. Also check out the body language quiz on her YouTube Channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.

The Love Language of Hands

For proof your honey cares (without waiting for him to say so!), check out your hand-holding style. "This gesture sheds light on the type of connection you share, as well its intensity," says body language expert Patti Wood in First For Women Magazine. To see how deep your bond is with your honey, find the star couple whose clasp resembles yours, then read Patti's analysis at the link below!

http://www.scribd.com/doc/38188766/First-for-Women-the-Love-Language-of-Hands

Body Language of Bishop Eddie Long about Allegations, Sex candal. Long Speaking to Church Concerning Sex Allegations

Bishop Eddie Long doesn't say he is innocent nor does he apologize to his congregation for putting them through all the pain caused by the sex scandal. I just analyzed his body language for CNN Headline News "Prime News"
He paused, he read from his notes, he used his glasses theatrically. But he didn't say, "I didn't do it."

He used humor to work the congregation before he brought up the charges. He smirked, just liked Former president Bush, showing his glee at getting the congregation on his side. More later.

Who Wears The Pants?

Patti Wood, body language expert, reads the nonverbal cues that these power couples in Hollywood are displaying for Cosmopolitan. She reveals which mate has more control in the relationship. The placement of one's hand, a pelvis and chest pressed into another and walking out in front of the other person are all gestures that reveal who wears the pants. Patti reveals their meaning at the link!

http://www.scribd.com/doc/38188642/CosmoWhoWearsThePants

What Your Fingernails Reveal About You

"The color we paint our nails and the care we give them subconsciously reflects our priorities and emotions," says nonverbal communication expert, Patti Wood, author of People Savvy. Patti tells First For Women, "we gesture with our hands when speaking from the heart, and since our nails are at the tips of our fingers, they become conduits of our feelings." Check the link to discover what your digits reveal!

http://www.scribd.com/doc/38188811/First-for-Women-What-Your-Fingernails-Reveal-About-You

Body Language Gestures That Reveal You're In Sync With Someone

Patti Wood, body language expert, tells Us Weekly that Jennifer and Scott are not displaying the "typical" behavior for a couple in sync as they pose on the red carpet. Out for a stroll......walking far apart.......hiding their hands...........what could all this mean? Patti reads the cues and shares her insights at the link!

http://www.scribd.com/doc/37892363/Us-Weekly-Jennifer-Scott

The Story Behind The Photo

Even though it's Mandy's "big night" ......she's in the lead position.....Patti Wood, body language expert, reveals for In Touch Weekly that Mandy doesn't forget to show boyfriend, Andy, that he's important to her. How does Mandy do it? Patti reveals the answer at the link!
http://www.scribd.com/doc/37892290/InTouchMandyMoore

Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at http://pattiwood.net/. Also check out the body language quiz on her YouTube Channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.

Body Language Of Winners & Losers

"Not the typical behavior of a winner" says Patti Wood, body language expert, when she did a photo read for Us Weekly of American Idol winners and losers. Ruben 's body language says he's happy to share the lime light with Clay but notice Clay's stiff body. Kelly is also displaying some "unusual
behavior for a winner" as she pulls Justin close.....and what's with Justin's smile?
Patti shares her insights at the link!

http://www.scribd.com/doc/37892561/Us-Weekly-Winners-Losers

Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at http://pattiwood.net/. Also check out the body language quiz on her YouTube Channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.

Are there signs of an affair in Ashton and Demi's body language?

I just read Ashton and Demi's body language for signs that there is trouble in their relationship.
Star magazine and Life and Style say the rumors are that Ashton had an affair. Today they where photographed at an event. Read the mags online or next week on the stands for my full read. I didn't see cues of tension from her. Demi and Ashton seem to still have a good healthy connection. However, Ashton's usually up buoyant body language was very different. His shoulder sloped downward. His eye brows and eyes normally up and open like a child on Christmas morning were down and more closed than normal. His cheek muscles bagged down. His jaw muscles sagged. These are nonverbal cues showing his fatigue and sadness.
Demi didn't show signs of stress. In the photos she is either leaning in towards him or erect in her posture. There were no signs or her leaning or pulling away from him. Their hand holds don't seem overly tight. Demi is not holding on tight. Her fingers are not pulled back. In one photo her little fingers were pulled out and away, but not stiff. Often their hands are interlaced. Her face doesn't show fatigue, tension, nor any disfavor or animosity towards him.

Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at http://PattiWood.net. Also check out the body language quiz on her YouTube Channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.

A Cuddle Sends Out A Message To Those Around

Colin's cuddles are sending

nonverbal messages to those around. Patti Wood, body language expert, reveals for Us Weekly what vibe he's putting out and how those being cuddled feel about it.

Notice the facial expression of Amelia and Spears in the first two photos. Major difference!

Check the link for her insights!

http://www.scribd.com/doc/37892325/UsWeeklyColin-sCuddles

How To Make Eye Contact

Author of "People Savvy" and body language expert, Patti Wood, shares with Cosmopolitan tips on how to make eye contact with that droolworthy dude sitting across the room and some coy moves to make when he is at close range. Check the link to find out the "head tilt" move !
http://www.scribd.com/doc/37892274/Cosmos-Eye-Contact

What's Revealed By A Hand On A Thigh?

Patti Wood, body language expert, shares her insights about Carson's hand on the thigh of his girlfriend, Josephine, for In Touch Weekly. Look at how far apart Carson's legs are in this photo. Also notice how he reaches his arm all the way across her body.
Check the link below for the story behind the pic!

http://www.scribd.com/doc/37822080/CarsonDaly

Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at http://pattiwood.net/. Also check out the body language quiz on her YouTube Channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.

When You Think They Don't Like You. First Impressions

You meet someone for the first time and perhaps they don't smile, or lean forward or make significant eye contact. Is it you? If you worry about your first impression, you may start to freak out. You don't have to. I am doing research on the brain and how people can make changes in their body language. Self Awareness, discovering what people might think about you is productive, but you don’t need to go overboard.

Years ago my audiences joked that after my seminars they were so self aware, so conscious of all the cues in the perfect handshake, the most sincere smile and all the other body language they learned, they didn't know what to do first. Now and then we talked about how to implement personal behavioral changes into their lives. I was reading the book, "The Mind and The Brain." looking to see how one of the authors, Doctor Jeffery Schwartz, advised his OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder) patients to make productive changes in their behavior. I was looking for a method to effectively calm any destructive or paralyzing self consciousness about your first impression. To paraphrase he instructed his patients to follow the Buddhist philosophy of wise attention (as supposed to unwise attention.) Schwartz advises his patients to "Revalue." See things for what they really are rather than as you may imagine them to be. I interpret this to mean. Instead of thinking, "Don't think of pink elephants." "Oh my God, there may be dangerous pink elephants." "Think instead of what is real and what isn’t.”Pink elephants don't exist." "The likelihood of a Pink Elephant coming into this room and stomping me is nil."

Apply this to situations when you are forming a first impression. Instead of meeting someone and thinking, "They didn't smile, they didn't lean forward." "They hate me!" "They are not making eye contact.”Oh they must think I am the biggest dork." See those disturbing thoughts for what they are and as Schwartz says, for his OCD patients he says "Wise attention means quickly recognizing the disturbing thoughts as senseless, as false, as errant brain signals not even worth the gray matter they rode in on, let alone acting on it." In analyzing someone’s behavior towards you in a first encounter instead assess it wisely. Think first the person then the topic or situation. Lastly think of yourself. Here is in more detail

First ask yourself, “What is going on with this person that may be motivating him to act this way?"

Then, what about this situation or what we are talking about may motivate him to act this way and finally, and with the least likelihood, what about I could make him act this way.

Very good advice I think.

Virtual Interviewing, Body Language,

Companies are taking virtual interviewing to a new level with Avatar virtual world New Life Interviewing. IT and international companies are using virtual worlds for interviewing.

http://www.newscientist.com/blog/technology/2007/09/first-impressions-second-life.html
Friday, September 28, 2007
First impressions, second life
I blogged last week about people working in virtual worlds. But I must admit I didn't think about how the ritual of the job interview might look in a virtual world.

In fact, global consultancy Accenture has already started using job interviews in Second Life to recruit real-life employees. That's what Darren Nicholson at Rowan University, New Jersey, US, told me. He's been studying how teams of IT workers can collaborate using virtual worlds, as an alternative to email or instant messaging.

Since May, two large job fairs attended by multi-national companies including Microsoft and Accenture have been held and, as a result, Accenture spent three days interviewing candidates inside the virtual world at the end of August.

To me, it sounds a little pointless. Unless they were using the still-buggy voice chat in Second Life, it would be much like interviewing using instant messaging. I'd consider the avatars a distraction from the content of a conversation, but Nicholson thinks they make an important contribution:
"When I prepare students for interviews with big companies I advise them how to use the behaviour recruiters are looking for. With an avatar you are even more in control. Are you wearing power red? Are you rearing dark blue? There are so many social indicators that we use in real life that are being transported into virtual universes."
But Nicholson doesn't think virtual interviewees will be able to game interviews more easily. Interviewers will be ready for it, he says. "It could work in their favour - I think you can learn a lot about people by the avatar they create and the way it acts."

Nicholson predicts the IT industry is where the practice will become common first. Teams of software developers are already work together from different parts of the world so it makes sense, he says.

The first place this will be tried on a large scale is probably Beijing. The city government did a deal in May with the producers of a virtual world called Entropia, with a view to shifting thousands of the over-crowded municipality's workers into offices in a virtual city.

Tom Simonite, online technology reporter
Labels: virtual-reality, virtual-worlds

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Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at http://pattiwood.net/. Also check out the body language quiz on her YouTube Channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.

The Power Of A Smile, Research On Smiling And Risky Behavior

The Power of a Smile, Research on Smiling and Risky Behavior

Research on Smiling and Risky Behavior
http://www.newscientist.com/article/mg20227024.700-cheery-traders-may-encourage-risk-taking.html

Cheery traders may encourage risk taking 07 April 2009 by Peter Aldhous Magazine issue 2702. Subscribe and save for similar stories, visit The Human Brain Topic Guide

WAS it just greed that prompted the risky financial decisions that triggered global economic meltdown, or could other factors have been at work?
Before rushing to condemn the traders and bankers responsible, consider this: perhaps they were in too good a mood. That's the intriguing implication of experiments showing that even a fleeting exposure to a smiling face makes people more likely to make risky investment decisions.
At the Cognitive Neuroscience Society meeting in San Francisco last week, graduate student Julie Hall of the University of Michigan in Ann Arbor described experiments in which 12 male and 12 female volunteers played a game in which they repeatedly had to choose between investing in a "safe" bond and two much riskier stocks.
For every round of the game, the bond paid out $3. One of the stocks paid out $5 half of the time, while the other lost $5 at the...

What Stars Posing Body Language Shows...Photos Say More Than "Cheese!"

Find out what Patti Wood, body language expert,
sees behind the poses of these stars. The camera doesn't lie Patti tells US Weekly!
You can check out her insights at the link below!

http://www.scribd.com/doc/37126568/Repeat-Pose-Offenders-US-Weekly

Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at http://pattiwood.net/. Also check out the body language quiz on her YouTube Channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.

Loneliness and Body Language

Loneliness and Isolation. Five years ago I started a post with the words, "I am lonely today." Have you felt that way recently? As I work on the techno impressions chapter for my new first impressions book I reread what I said about the cost of loneliness. Isolation and lack of community are so much a part of our fast paced lives. Life can be rich and meaningful. It seems amazing to me that I could have ever felt lonely even when I had so many people in my life that I loved. The original post was lost on this blog when I switched host providers so here it is again.

I am lonely today. I got up and got on my computer like so many people hoping to download emails from friends. Sure enough there were emails from friends meeting me tonight for dinner and comedy improv competition and other friends that want to meet for dinner and movie tomorrow night and one from a girlfriend who was just checking in. But I am still lonely. I am sitting at my computer in my big old four bedroom two story house, all by myself. Well there is Bo, the wonder dog, curled up at my feet, but I am so lonely I am resisting the urge to belt out the old 70’s song ALL BY MYSELF. That’s lonely. I don’t think that we were meant to be so lonely and isolated.

We spend so much time working to get the big old car and house and live in suburbs where we can’t hear our neighbors and have to drive to get anywhere…we co-exist rather than live in community. Richard Schwartz, a psychiatrist who co-authored the book, "Overcoming Loneliness in Everyday Life," with his wife, Jacqueline Olds, MD, assistant professor of psychiatry at Harvard Medical School says, "Our notion of success is being able to purchase what you need and not be obligated to anyone,'' I Want to be obligated to people. I have that with my wonderful friends. I want someone to expect things of me. I want someone to expect me to be there when they call, to love hearing their voice, to enjoy seeing their smile, to think that there company is a delight. I want someone to miss me when they have not seen me in a while. I want intimacy.

Last week I missed my Thursday night discussion group and they called me from the restaurant to find out where I was. That felt so good. It is strangely comforting to be missed. Yet I think we may fear the opposite in our romantic relationship. We may fear becoming so close to someone that we will miss them when they are not there. That is my fear. Or if we allow them to get close to us they will expect things from us that we don’t want to give. Something that is not a problem for me but I know is from experiences with others. And both those fears keep us lonely.

Now you may have read my article about my falling down the stairs weight loss adventure and think, hey you say you are getting hit on all the time, what is with the loneliness? You don’t think I actually follow through with any of those grocery store and parking lot flirting do you? No I just avert my gaze, look down and smile tensely. Romantic Relationships are scary. And even when we are in one, fear can make people in them get very close and then fear that intimacy. Now you may be wondering what any of this has to do with nonverbal communication. Everything. Because when we are scared we respond with our primal Freeze Flight Fight instinctual brain. Our neocortex with all its beautiful language is not accessed. So we stop talking and use nonverbal actions to communicate. We may communicate with silence, distancing and time. I have experienced the rubber band stretch that Mars and Venus relationship Guru John Grey talks about. Romances where the man gets very close then gets scared and stretches out and away like a rubber band then snaps back again and in again and out again. I have wanted to say “It will be OK, we can help each other through our fears.” But fear stops us and we stay silent.

Here is research on the topic.

One of the most fascinating revelations of the last decade is that emotions change the cells in our body. Just as exercise can change your molecular pathways so can emotion. Anger, stress and loneliness are signals for “starvation” and chronic danger. Research shows that lying on the coach watching TV melts our muscles not just because we aren’t jogging but because it isolates us. And positive emotions that come from loving other, building friendships and community actually trigger process in our body that help us build our bodies. Loneliness “melts” our bodies as surely as sedentary living. Optimism, love and community trigger the process of growth, building our bodies, hearts and minds. I am ready to do some growing.

Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at http://pattiwood.net/. Also check out the body language quiz on her YouTube Channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.

Men Are More Attractive If Other Women Look... Research on Attraction

Men Are More Attractive If Other Women Look...

Research on Attraction

What Makes Men Attractive?
Well, if other women look at him, he could get a lot cuter!

http://www.newscientist.com/article/dn10966-beauty-is-in-the-eye-of-your-friends.html

Beauty is in the eye of your friends
00:01 17 January 2007 by Debora MacKenzie
For similar stories, visit the Love and Sex Topic Guide
It is a classic image: a group of young women sighing over the latest heartthrob. But do they all really share identical taste for, say, Brad Pitt, or that cute guy in physics class? A new study suggests that, in fact, women will look more favorably on the men that other women find attractive.

Female guppies, quail and finches tend to mate with males that look like the males they have seen other females paired with. Such "mate choice copying" can pay off. If it is difficult to choose the best mating material, or takes a lot of time and energy, it makes sense to go with what works for the other girls.

Yet although human mate selection suffers just such difficulties, there has been little evidence that women do this, until now.

Ben Jones at the University of Aberdeen in Scotland, and colleagues, showed 28 men and 28 women pairs of male faces and asked them to rate their attractiveness. The photos had been already been rated by 40 women as of about equal attractiveness.

Striking difference
The researchers then showed the same faces alongside a third photo of a female face in profile, positioned so she was looking at one of them, and smiling - or not. The viewers were asked to grade the faces again.

Women found the men who were being smiled at suddenly more attractive, while men who apparently elicited no such smiling approval were pronounced less attractive.

Men, meanwhile, behaved in a strikingly different manner. They rated men who had been smiled at as less attractive. "Within-sex competition promotes negative attitudes towards men who are the target of positive social interest from women," the researchers conclude.

Or to put it another way, the next time you hear a man say "I don't know what she sees in him", remember the fact she's sees anything at all may be off-putting enough…

Journal reference: Proceedings of the Royal Society B (DOI: 10.1098/rspb.2006.0205)

Body Language Expert to Speak at High School, College or University

If you need a Body Language expert to speak at your High School, College or University please contact our office. I am a body language expert and I speak to students, at schools, colleges and universities. Typically I am brought in to speak through the career service office or the student activities director and or the Business School or MBA program.

If you would like me to speak to your college or university feel free to call or email our office and or send me the names and contact information for the career service office and or the student activities director.

If you are a High School Student and you would like me to speak at your High School please send me the names and contact information, emails phone numbers etc. of your school principal. I would be happy to contact them to see if they would like me to speak for the whole school. You might also send the head of the "in service" training and education for the teachers as I have spoken to groups of teachers and groups of school principals.

We get many requests from students that would like me to speak to their class or as part of a senior project. I can do that if I have a paid speaking engagement at your school on the same day.

Body Language Reads of Politicians

Body Language reads of Politicians. Eliot Spitzer is on the far left. Far right is George Pataki. Next to him is David Paterson. The commentator is next to Spitzer. Did a photo read today for the New York Daily News. http://www.mydailynews.com

Were The "Sparks" Flying?

Patti Wood, body language expert, weighs in for US Weekly on the nonverbal gestures of Cameron and Justin. What did their body language reveal about their relationship?

Find out Patti's insights at the link below!

http://www.scribd.com/doc/37126467/Cameron-and-Justin-US-Weekly

Football Coaches And Quarterback''s Body Language

A reporter for Sports Illustrated called me yesterday for a story on leadership in sports and body language. We had a great discussion about isopraxism, a pull towards the same behavior, that leaders create. He was interested to know that negative body language has a stronger pull that positive body language and that a quarter back or coach's nonverbal behavior can have a dramatic effect on the team. The story should be available at www.sportsillustrated.com next week.

Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at http://PattiWood.net. Also check out the body language quiz on her YouTube Channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.

Why Black Women May Smile Less and Get Angry Instead

Why Black Women May Smile Less and Get Angry Instead

Patti, Christelyn Karazin here, the author of the book on interracial and intercultural relationships you spoke with a while back. Can you comment for, www.beyondblackwhite.com, regarding the issue of black women and why many just don't smile. Here's an article for reference: > http://www.theroot.com/views/single-minded-black-girls-puberty from Helena Andrews, author of Bitch Is the New Black.

Here are the rough notes from my response. Christenlyn. Fascinating

smiling is sign of appeasement,
people with lower status smile more often to get what they want,
Women smile more than men in social settings.
Men are often uncomfortable when a women who typically smiles in not smiling. (I believe men who say, "why aren't you smiling?' are concerned that a non-smiling women may be angry or trying to assert power if she is not smiling. Each time I taught my Women and Leadership workshops at the Wharton School of Business I would ask how many men have said, "Why aren't you smiling," to you and every woman would raise her hand.

Research also shows:

High Status seemingly "Powerful people" smile less, Male or Female
Men with more testosterone smile less and are quicker to respond with anger.

Here you have a fascinating and in some ways very sad, cultural and racial switch. So a women says, "I can't smile if I want to be powerful and accepted." to look tough and be accepted by my female peers “I need to sneer, and look like a bitch."

An angry face does get a different response than an appeasing smile. It can feel empowering. But at a great cost.

A smile actually changes your brain chemistry so you feel happier.
The "facial feedback loop" insures a smile is typically met with a smile from other people.
Women who smile are typically seen as more friendly and more attractive
Women who smile in the yearbook photos are found to be happier 25 years later.

A sneer is a prickly protective armor. You won't be stomped on, but you may keep people too far away to touch and hold you close. It may feel like it empowers you. Tyler Perry gets laughs by showing angry bitchy sneering non smiling women. The title character in the Stephan King movie Deloris Clayborn says, "Sometimes being a bitch is all you have to hold on to." sometimes the Black angry women in Tyler Perry's movies just complain, but often the angry "bitch" is energized to powerful destructive action. The iconic defiant sneer on the wife in the movie, "Waiting to Exhale" comes to mind. She goes from a happy smiling wife to a sneering ragging tiger getting mad enough at her unfaithful husband that she takes all his clothes and goodies like his golf club and piles them on his Mercedes and sets them on fire. The sneer on her face along with her defiant upraised chin as she watches the flames climb seemed to say to Black Women, stop smiling and taking it, get angry and start taking.

Smiling Research...Words Are Funnier If Sounding The Word Makes You Smile

Smiling Research...Words Are Funnier If Sounding The Word Makes You Smile

Words Are Funnier If As You Say The Word Your Mouth Forms A Smile.

http://www.newscientist.com/article/mg19426070.700-quacked-humour.html

Quacked humour
09 June 2007 by Ivan Berger, Fawood, New Jersey, US
Magazine issue 2607. Subscribe and save
Richard Wiseman's theory that "Quack" is funnier than "Moo" holds true for English speakers (12 May, p 46). But is it true for those whose languages assign the "k" sound to other animals' cries and not to ducks? Or are there no such languages? The only foreign duck sound I know is the French "quank", in which the "k" would probably have less effect, overshadowed by the preceding nasal sound.

From Kevin Whitesides

You suggest that the spoken hard "k" sound is likely to be funnier because of "facial feedback", for the reason that saying the "k" sound can supposedly make one mimic smiling. This is easily refuted. Try it yourself and you will very quickly recognize that your smiling face is the result of the vowel that precedes or follows the "k".

For example, contrast the facial expression of the word "quack" (as in the article) with the word "cook", which clearly does not create a smile when said. It is the hard "a" sound in "quack" that makes the smiling face. If there is indeed some reason that "k" is funnier than other sounds, it's not because it makes you look like you're smiling.

Also the people in the article were reading a joke, not being told the joke orally. So the facial aspect would not have come into play, unless the person was reading the joke aloud or at least mouthing it.

Arcata, California, US

The editor writes:

• Further personal experimentation suggests that it is the combination of "k" with certain vowel sounds that produces the strongest "forced smile". For example, "key" does so more than "be", "dee" or "fee", although "k" with some other vowels lacks the effect.

Talk So Anyone Will Listen!

Body language pro, Patti Wood, reveals for First For Women the telltale traits and communication secrets of four distinct personality types - and how best to get through to each one.
Check the link!

http://www.scribd.com/doc/37126602/Talk-So-Anyone-Will-Listen-First-For-Women

How You Can Change Your Mood With Body Language And Color Choices!

First For Women has asked Patti Wood, body language expert, to share her insights on the secrets of appearing energetic and the secrets of appearing sexy. Think "up", color effects your energy by.......these are body language tricks that take you from cranky or blue to what's best for you. Check her link below to discover how you can choose what mood you want to be in. http://www.scribd.com/doc/37126619/Which-Mood-Do-You-Choose-First-For-Women

Women and Smiling,

Women and Smiling

I have been reading the responses to the blog entry on women and smiling.

As I say in my book. I really think they are just incredibly uncomfortable. When men see a smiling women, they know she isn't a threat. A women who is not smiling is troubling. Men as a gender don't read the subtle differences in facial expressions. They have difficulty discerning the 57 types of smiles. I am speaking on body language and first impressions at a Women of Color conference in New York next month and one of the tactics I will be discussing is choosing to smile or not smile.

Who's The Boss In The Relationship?

Subtle nonverbal signs speak volumes about shifting

relationship dynamics. First tapped seasoned body
language expert, Patti Wood, for her insight into the
surprising "tells" of relationship dominance.
For Patti's insights, check the link below!
http://www.scribd.com/doc/37126303/Who-sTheBoss-First

Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at http://pattiwood.net/. Also check out the body language quiz on her YouTube Channel athttp://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert .

Bachelor Bob's Body Language, Being Bad

Body language expert, Patti Wood, examines the bad behavior of Bachelor Bob for US Weekly. Check out her insights at the link below!

http://www.scribd.com/doc/37126345/Bad-Behavior-US-Weekly

Smiling, Why Do Women Smile When They Are Angry?

Women smile when they are angry, to protect themselves. The smile softens the strength of the anger and is seen in those who lack power or status.

Studies reveal that women smile more than men. Women are often taught not only to mask our aggressive feelings, to smile and not get angry. There are benefits to smiling. It projects warmth, conveys confidence and is a valuable tool for establishing rapport.

The problem comes when there is a mismatch. Giving a smile when you don't feel happy.

Smiling "happy" when it is inappropriate confuses men. Smiling "happy" when your tone of voice is angry or saying nothing is wrong while your tight smile says there is isn't honest. It can work against you by sending a mixed message. After observing and researching smiling since 1982 I fear that it is one of women's biggest challenges in work and personal relationships. My friend Elaine is brilliant, yet when she worked in corporate America she often met a glass ceiling. Yesterday she read a chapter in my new book and said, "Oh my gosh Patti, I think I smiled and laughed too much." After reading this chapter I realized I smiled at work when I was angry as well.

Isn't it funny when we are angry, we try not to communicate it, yet we want people to listen to us and grant our unexpressed request? When we sell a product or an idea we want to be credible, but we smile to be liked and so we may look weak instead of powerful, flirty and silly instead of credible.

Patti Wood, MA, Certified Speaking Professional - The Body Language Expert. For more body language insights go to her website at http://PattiWood.net. Also check out the body language quiz on her YouTube Channel at http://youtube.com/user/bodylanguageexpert.

They're Not In Tune! Bob And Estella Couple Body Language

According to body language expert, Patti Wood, Bob and Estella didn't seem like a couple on The Ellen DeGeneres Show. Patti is quoted in In Touch Weekly saying, "They're not in tune." Check out the link for all the details!

http://www.scribd.com/doc/37126506/It-sOver-InTouch

Attraction Tips, Smiling And Eye Contact Research

Attraction Tips, Smiling and Eye Contact Research

In my body language programs you learn not just what to do but why certain nonverbal behaviors work. It's great to say, smile and look someone in the eye to enhance the attraction process, but to know the research that shows why that is such a powerful action in the attraction process really informs you and can motivate you to change and or improve your nonverbal behavior. So when you say, "You need to smile and make eye contact to win a mate." Here is the why behind the do.

Here is the link and the research.

http://www.newscientist.com/article/dn12886-eye-contact-and-a-smile-will-win-you-a-mate.html

Eye contact and a smile will win you a mate
11:22 07 November 2007 by Debora MacKenzie
For similar stories, visit the Love and Sex Topic Guide
It's official: you are more likely to think other people are attractive if they are looking straight at you and smiling. The finding helps to explain long-standing questions over the subtle ways in which evolution can determine human preferences.

An important question in biology is whether a particular function or ability is the result of evolution or an accidental byproduct of it. Some biologists believe that human perception falls into this second category because there has been little evidence that how we perceive things like faces affects our biological success in ways that are selected for or against.

But the evidence is mounting that evolution has conditioned our perception in subtle ways.

Claire Conway and colleagues at the University of Aberdeen in Scotland, UK, paired nearly identical photos of computer-generated faces, with smiling or disgusted expressions. The pair differed only in where the irises were pointed: straight at the viewer, or off to the side (see image top right).

Several hundred Aberdeen undergraduates, in the lab and online, rated the faces for sexual attractiveness, and for likeability, a sexually neutral quality. Both men and women found faces looking straight at them to be more attractive and more likeable, even if the faces looked disgusted though unsurprisingly, there was a greater preference for smiles.

Sexual bias
But when the viewers were rating the faces for attractiveness, the preference for being gazed at directly by smiling eyes was much greater for faces of the opposite sex, especially when they were rated by men. There was no such sexual bias in the preference for a direct gaze when the students rated disgusted-looking faces, or when they were rating any faces for likeability.

The Aberdeen team says the sexual bias in subjects' perception of sexual attractiveness in a direct, smiling gaze is hard to explain as a functionless byproduct of perception. But it could have evolved to ease the effort of mating, by directing efforts towards people who are already expressing an interest.

The idea that evolution played a role in determining our facial preferences is backed up by other work, such as research showing that perceptions of attractiveness change depending on peer pressure, or even the time of the month.

What about cultures, common in Asia, where gazing directly at someone is rude? "The Asian participants [in the study] demonstrated preferences for direct over averted gaze," Conway told New Scientist. But these are private preferences, she cautions. "Whether or not such preferences are also expressed in public situations we don't know."

Journal reference: Proceedings of the Royal Society (DOI: 10.1098/rspb.2007.1073)

Love - Learn more about the science behind it in our comprehensive special report.

The Human Brain - With one hundred billion nerve cells, the complexity is mind-boggling. Learn more in our cutting edge special report.

John Cusack's First Foray Into The World Of Tweeting.

I just did a read of John Cusack’s first foray in the world of tweeting for Fox News.com

I will put up the link to the article when I get it from Fox News. I have my rough notes below.

Coincidentally, I was working on the techno impressions chapter of my new book when I got the request. I told the journalist that most tweeters speaking on political or social issues tend to make strong declarative statements. They start their sentences with a capital I; they put lots of exclamation points at the end of their tweets and use caps to shout out what they feel. John is not so self assured. The few sentences he starts with an I he uses a little I. It's clear in a content analysis that he is not sure how he should act in this medium. He starts a tweet sharing his opinion, but, in more than half of the tweets I analyzed he stops in the middle of the sentence to ask if he is following the rules or saying things correctly. This is particularly interesting when you compare it to how he is in camera interviews. I have done many nonverbal reads on Johns' TV interviews. He is calm, self assured, intelligent and articulate and often witty. In his tweets he does not use capital letters, or follow the rules or spelling grammar or punctuation. The spelling seems phonetic and the vowels inside words or incorrect phonetic spelling and letters inside words being mixed up are mistakes I see in people, who are dyslexic. That is personally, very easy to recognize as I have dyslexia. It is interesting that he chooses to ignore the rules here but cautious with his words.

1. was that who it was?? RT Shawn Hannity sings 4 Cusack...http://youtu.be/r5KeGccP9Jk . filmed live at a satanist celebrity cult death center.2:33 AM Sep 2nd via TweetDeck

2. doesnt that guy work in politics? or was it entertainment?10:42 PM Sep 1st via TweetDeck

3. whats been going on guys? whhttp://youtu.be/r5KeGccP9Jk10:40 PM Sep 1st via TweetDeck

4. freindship tour rolling through santa monica today..12:15 PM Sep 1st via TweetDeck

taibbi... thttp://bit.ly/cZwdn3

1. ummm.. was sbeing sarcastic about the rules- i'm irish -- dont do well with arbitrary authority1:54 PM Aug 31st via TweetDeck

2. i want to be a good boy for them all-- did i miss something? any other rules i should follow?1:48 PM Aug 31st via TweetDeck

3. hope twipolice tell me what' sok comming out myown little twi-feed....no jokes no CAPS-- no tonaly quesytionabe insights into politcis1:47 PM Aug 31st via TweetDeck

i would sadly agree- a bit overstated- but sadly true-RT @jeffjfyke: Gore Vidal says US has a one-party govt with two right wings.1:42 PM Aug 31st via TweetDeck

1. the gop establishment has been in a shamfull cycle of fear mongering for years in my opinion..1:27 PM Aug 31st via TweetDeck

2. ron paul on everything - but i think he has character in many ways.. depends on the peroson.1:26 PM Aug 31st via TweetDeck

3. nothing... i may not agre with RT @RambobeatsRocky: John, I've watched your movies for 25+ years...what do you have against conservatives?1:25 PM Aug 31st via TweetDeck

4. and the flag..? i know were not supposed to make jokes about anything - now that america has turned back to the lord..1:23 PM Aug 31st via TweetDeck

without changing context.. am i for or against ? how about a celebrity death cult center? i will join as pennance to the folks who own god1:22 PM Aug 31st via TweetDeck

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Smiling, Why Do Women Smile When They Are Angry?