A trustworthy person has consistent, predictable behavior. You can rely on
them to do what they say they will do and act in a way that makes sense and
considers others’ feelings.
An Untrustworthy person is just the opposite.
1.
Unpredictable. You can’t count on them to act and
respond as they have in the past and or changes in their normal baseline of behaviors
that don’t seem to make sense. That they don’t want to talk about or that they
give lame excuses for and or they get mad at you for noticing.
2.
The amount of time they want to spend with you or communicating
with you changes. For example, they were calling, texting several times a day
and suddenly they go quiet and can’t be reached.
3.
Lateness. Time is a powerful nonverbal communicator and
someone saying they will be somewhere at a certain time and then breaking that
promise shows a lack of respect for you and your time. Again, you can’t rely on
them, you can’t trust them.
4.
Quick mood changes that don’t make sense. They may get
mad for no reason at all, or get mad at you for something that was not a big
deal, or that if you step back is bullying. Everyone can show emotions, but if
the emotions are used to make you be quiet or not question their odd behavior
and make YOU feel bad that’s not healthy. Trustworthy people can cry and get mad,
but you know what makes them upset, and it is reasonable considering the
circumstances. You don’t have to avoid topics or walk on eggshells to prevent
them from getting emotional.
5.
Related to that they change how they act towards you
and feel about you. One minute they may be super happy, and energetic, and act like you’re
the most wonderful person in the world smiling at you, giving you focused
intense eye contact and hanging on every word you say, the next minute they are
mad, crying, or cold.
6.
Someone can come off as untrustworthy when YOU feel uncomfortable
around them. If you can’t predict someone’s behavior and or you fear their intense
emotions you are going to be tense, on edge, filled with cortisol when you are
with them, and tired and or drained or numb when they aren’t with you. Inconsistent
intense people can create an oddly addictive response. You're high with them, get
a fix or intense emotions, and then nothing. Just like a drug addict, you may
crave the high and or just the intensity.
